


look for the girl with the broken smile (ask her if she wants to stay awhile)

by xavierurban



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), Heroes in Crisis (DCU Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Hood/Arsenal (Comics), Titans (Comics)
Genre: Acquaintances to Lovers, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blowjobs, Bottom Jason Todd, Bottom Wally West, Bruce Wayne’s A+ Parenting, Creampie, Cunnilingus, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, Double Vaginal Penetration, Edging, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Heroes In Crisis Fix-It, Human Vibrator Wally West, Hurt/Comfort, Jason Todd Needs A Hug, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Metahuman Jason Todd, Multi, Multiple Orgasms, Multiple Sex Positions, No seriously there’s so much porn, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Past Character Death, Porn With Plot, Recovery, Referenced Drug Addiction, Referenced murder, Restraints, Rimming, Rough Sex, Roy Harper Needs a Hug, Speedster Sex, Top Roy Harper, Top Wally West, Unhealthy Relationships, Unrequited Love, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Wally West Needs a Hug, degradation kink, fem!Jason Todd - Freeform, ish???, ok it might be more than undertones tbh, romantically it is i guess???, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:53:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 50,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26423671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xavierurban/pseuds/xavierurban
Summary: For FemJay Week 2020Day One:Stayed with the League/Ummi Jay|Relationship with Mask/Villain|First TimeDay Three:Arranged Marriage/Secret Relationship|Baby of the Family|Meta/Augmentations"Was," Roy says quietly, "Shewasyour wife."Wally blinks rapidly as tears start to well in his eyes, and he rolls over, turning his back to Roy, who sighs again.His words bounce around in Wally's mind, and he curls around himself as a few tears slip free. It's a few minutes before Roy sighs once more and then curls himself around Wally's back, holding him tightly as Wally lets out a sob.AKA the hoodflash heroes in crisis fix-it fic that no one asked for.
Relationships: Jason Todd/Wally West, Roy Harper/Jason Todd, Roy Harper/Jason Todd/Wally West, Roy Harper/Wally West, Tim Drake & Jason Todd, background Roy Harper/Donna Troy, past Linda Park/Wally West
Comments: 38
Kudos: 73
Collections: FemJay Week 2020





	1. i.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m a bit late because I got sidetracked by some friends last night and was nodding off by the time I got to the last ten pages on my final, pre-posting edit >.>; But better late than never, yes? This is a combined fill for Days One and Three of Fem Jason Todd Week 2020; the prompt I chose for day one – relationship with a mask – colours the whole story, but the prompt for day three – Meta – plays a more significant role in part two. But on the topic of being late, uh, consider this your heads up that there’s a very, very high chance that chapter 2 will be late. Based on my current schedule, I’m hoping it will be no more than two weeks late, though hopefully less than that.
> 
> Before we get started, there are a few small things I wanted to mention/warn for:
> 
>   * Chapter 1 is… particularly porn-heavy, although plot is still happening. Unless things change drastically, chapter 2 will be a fair bit heavier on the plot.
>   * I’m not tagging this as anti-Roy because it’s not meant to be character bashing (pls jayroy is one of my top two Jason ships), but he… definitely doesn’t come across in the best light in this fic, so if that’s a deal breaker, this might not be the fic for you. He’s not ill-intentioned or anything, just a bit… oblivious to the impacts of some of his behaviour.
>   * I’m also not tagging infidelity, because I don’t really see this as a ‘cheating fic’, but you should probably bear in mind that, even though Linda remembers nothing right now, Wally still considers them kinda married.
>   * Finally, there is one content warning that applies to chapter 2, but it’s also… super spoilery? So if you really want to check, you can scroll to the endnotes. The other main one I can think of applies to chapter 1 and is for a nightmare sequence that involves character death; this scene is entirely in italics, so if you need to skip over it, then that’s your tip-off.
> Title from She Will Be Loved by Maroon Five


Jay and Roy are already there when Wally arrives at Sanctuary, though it’s only on the third day that he realises it. He’s heading back to his room from a session in the Chamber when a familiar laugh rings out from the other end of the hall. It shoots right through him, making his heart clench and his gut twist, and Wally reroutes himself without thinking about it, desperate for some kind of recognition.

Some kind of _interaction_ , God, because he’s not built for this, not built for solitude and secrecy and _hiding_.

He finds himself in the communal kitchen, and there are only two other people inside. One of them has to be Roy, and a closer look makes it clear which one. Absently, Wally reaches up to touch his own hair, wonders if it’s distinctive enough to be a dead-giveaway, too.

Or maybe it’s just because he knows Roy.

The person with him is a woman, tall with dark hair, and, for a moment, Wally thinks it might be Donna, but--

But, no.

Donna is too strong to ever need a place like this.

And then she turns, and she’s not wearing the same garish gold mask that he is, the one that’s given out to everyone who enters the Sanctuary.

 _Optional_ , the greeters had said it was.

Instead, there’s a simple red domino mask covering her eyes, and Wally wonders why she bothered with the robe at all when it’s so obvious who she is.

Or maybe it’s just that Wally can put the pieces together, given how closely she’s standing to Roy.

He steps further into the kitchen and her head snaps up, her blue-green eyes tracking him warily through the open lenses. Roy turns then, too, and Wally can’t help being curious about the way he seems to instinctively place himself in front of Jay. She seems to notice it, too, if the annoyed twitch of her lip is anything to go by.

Wally hesitates and raises his hands in a show of peace, and he keeps his voice low when he speaks, not wanting to risk outing any of them to potential passer-bys.

“R?” He asks, keeping it simple. He wishes he could see Roy’s face, but it’s enough to see the way the tension bleeds out of him as he relaxes and then steps forward--

And then Wally finds himself trapped in the archer’s strong arms, caught up in one of his signature, inescapable hugs.

“Hey, Kid,” he says, and his voice is softer than Wally would have expected, but he supposes this isn’t an environment where you’re hoping to run into an old friend.

Well, unless you’re him, apparently, because the relief that courses through him as he sags against Roy’s chest is undeniable. Roy only holds him tighter in response, squeezing him close against him before finally letting him go.

Wally steps back, reaching up to rub the back of his neck awkwardly, and Jay wordlessly takes down another mug, dropping a tea bag into it before turning to lift the kettle off of the stove. She nudges it towards him after she pours the water and then steps back with her own mug in her hands, inhaling the rising steam for a moment before she sighs.

“Let’s go somewhere a little more private.”

Wally nods numbly as he picks up the mug, and he watches as Roy does the same with his before turning to lead the way out of the kitchen and back down the hall.

They stop in front of a door that’s only two down from his own, and Wally feels something loosen in his chest at that. He’s not alone here. He’s _not_.

He trails in behind Roy, and Jay follows behind him, stopping to shut and lock the door before she crosses to set her mug down on the dresser. Wally watches idly as she strips out of the robe and peels her mask off, and, well, he doesn’t _mean_ to, but his gaze trails appreciatively over her body, taking in her long, toned legs and the slim dip of her waist. The curve of her breasts beneath the tight fit of her sports bra and the thickness of her thighs where her skirt ends inches higher than it should, not even making an attempt to cover the kris that’s holstered on her left thigh. 

He looks away, grateful for the mask that hides the embarrassed flush of his cheeks when Roy, now unmasked, raises a brow at him and smirks like he knows exactly what Wally’s thinking.

And he’s _not_ , he’s not thinking anything, okay. It’s just that Jay’s grown up so much since coming back to life, and she’s not the little girl he tends to remember whenever something happens to make her cross his mind.

She’s gorgeous, and Wally has _eyes_ , but he’s not thinking anything.

He’s married, for Christ’s sake.

Wally’s just standing there like an idiot, though, and he startles when Jay approaches him and takes his tea from his hands.

“Not that you have to,” she says, shifting from foot to foot, “But. I mean, you can take it off, if you want.”

Wally nods dumbly, and then shakes his head.

_Get it together, West._

It’s only been a little over two days, how can he possibly be this awkward around other people already?

He takes the mask off first, hesitating as he looks around before he decides to set it on the chair near the door, and then he pulls the robe off and sets that on the chair, too. Jay’s smile is warm when he turns back to her, and he accepts the steaming mug back with a quiet expression of thanks.

“C’mere, Wally,” Roy says gently, and Wally gravitates towards him like iron to a magnet, just like he always has.

They end up sitting on the bed, because there isn’t really much other choice, and Jay curls herself up against the headboard, her knees drawn in towards her chest, as Roy sits a few inches from her and sprawls his legs out.

Wally doesn’t even think about it before he settles into the vee of Roy’s splayed legs and leans back against him, and Roy grunts in surprise but then slings an arm around his waist to stop him from changing his mind and pulling away. Jay’s gaze sweeps over them, but, if she’s surprised, she does a damn good job of hiding it.

“So,” Roy says after taking a long swallow of tea and then reaching out to set the mug on the side table, where Wally knows it will end up being forgotten, “How long’ve you been here?”

Wally doesn’t answer right away, just traces the lip of his mug with the pad of one of his fingers as he shrugs.

“S’day three,” he says finally, and then, “You?”

“‘Bout a week.”

Wally nods, because what else is there to say to that, and silence falls awkwardly for several long minutes as Wally sips his tea and tries to figure out something to say.

It’s Jay who finally breaks the silence, and gratitude wells in his chest. People like to say that the Bats are emotionally inept, but Wally would disagree. _The_ Bat is, maybe, and the current Robin - Damian - too, but Dick rarely is. He has his moments, sure, but Wally has always been able to rely on him to help him screw his head on straight.

He thinks, maybe, that Jay falls more on her older brother’s side of things here.

“Are you okay?” She asks, not bothering to beat around the bush. No “how are you holding up?” or “what brings you here?” And, sure, maybe the answer is obvious, because he _is_ here, but--

“No,” he whispers, and Roy’s arm tightens around his waist as Jay gives him a sad smile.

“Yeah,” she agrees softly, “But that’s okay.”

His heart feels like it stops, just for a moment, and Wally can’t quite hold back the whine that tears its way out of his throat. Because it’s one thing to _know_ that it’s okay to struggle, to _not_ be okay, but to hear it directed specifically at himself…

Jay reaches out to take his tea from him when his hands start shaking, and Roy shifts behind him, murmuring a quiet _‘c’mere’_ that has Wally turning to face him. He’s immediately enveloped in another of Roy’s tight hugs, and the dam breaks, tears flooding out of him as he clings to Roy’s shirt and cries into his chest.

“That’s it,” Roy murmurs, and Wally shudders when Roy’s lips graze over the shell of his ear, “It’s okay, Wally, let it out.”

Wally doesn’t remember a whole lot after that, if he’s being honest. He’s pretty sure that somewhere amongst his sobs he’d managed a few short sentences of explanation, thinks he probably mentioned Linda, and Jai, and Irey, mentioned how he misses them, how it _hurts_ , like there’s a gaping hole in his chest that will never be filled again. He thinks he remembers, too, the way that Roy only ever held him closer, murmuring quiet reassurances against his ear as Jay’s hands tentatively settled on his back and his shoulders, soothing him with gentle circles and quiet words of her own.

It all feels like relief, but it feels horrible, too; he feels like a jackass, coming into this safe space of theirs and throwing all of his own baggage at their feet in a desperate bid for someone to help him sort through it. The last thing either of them needs is someone else to look out for, someone else to walk on eggshells around, when they’re obviously here for their own reasons.

And Wally can _guess_ at those reasons.

Lian. Drugs. Drinking. Oliver.

Bruce. The Joker. Artemis. Bizzaro.

 _Dying_.

It isn’t that he thinks his own problems are trivial, not by a long shot, but-

But Wally can’t shake the feeling that he’s supposed to be able to shoulder it all on his own.

He thinks, maybe, that they can see it, too, because he’s barely opened his mouth to apologize once he’s finally cried himself out before Jay is cutting him off with a quiet _‘don’t’._

“It’s okay, West,” she says, and Roy hums his agreement as he squeezes Wally more tightly for a moment before easing his grip.

“You don’t have to go it alone,” Roy murmurs, and Wally sniffles before nodding against Roy’s chest.

“Okay.”

* * *

It doesn’t take long for Wally to clue into the way Roy and Jay act around each other, but he wishes that he’d overlooked it or that they would at least _try_ to hide it.

Call him a bitter old bastard, but, God, it hurts to see them. It hurts to see the way Jay’s eyes light up when she looks at Roy and the way that Roy can’t keep his hands off of her. They gravitate towards each other like it physically hurts them to be apart, and Wally hates it, tells himself it’s because he just wants to be alone with one of his oldest friends and not because seeing them together like that hurts like a stab wound right through the chest.

Fuck, he misses Linda. _His_ Linda. Misses their intimacy, their _life_ together.

Their _kids_.

Fuck, but he misses the kids more than he thinks he can bear most days, their absence a gaping wound inside of him.

He wonders how Roy can stand it, how he’s made it this long with a hole the size of a child in his chest. Maybe he shouldn’t be upset with him for finding happiness where he can, shouldn’t be bitter that Roy has someone like Jay to help him fill that void, but-

But it isn’t _fair_.

Irey and Jai are gone, and Linda might as well be gone, too. Everything that they shared is _gone_ , and it will never be what it once was, even if they do start over. The Linda of this timeline is every bit of the woman he’s loved for years, but she’s also _not_ , and she never will be, either.

But she can be _something_ , and that has to be enough.

Right?

Is it a betrayal of everything he had with his Linda if he starts over with the one here? Is it fair to _this_ Linda, if he’s always going to be comparing her to the woman he loves more than anyone else in the world? Will she ever be anything more than a shade of his real wife?

Will he tear her apart, trying to force her into the box he’s already designed for her?

Is he meant to spend the rest of his life alone, instead? Mourning the loss of his wife and kids and never moving on?

God, but what is he supposed to _do_?

How can everyone else make it look so easy?

* * *

It’s a few days later, in the middle of the afternoon, that Wally gets a text from Roy, asking him to come over to his room. He doesn’t think much of it as he tosses on his robe and settles the mask over his face - it’s unnecessary, he supposes, because he can make the trip from his room to Roy’s too fast for anyone to catch even a glimpse of him, but. Well, he won’t deny that it feels a little like a way of protecting himself. Sure, he’s started to tentatively mingle a little here and there with the other _patients_ , but.

He’s just not ready for anyone to have the chance to figure him out.

Still, he does make the trip faster than anyone can see, not bothering to knock before he swings the door to Roy’s bedroom open and zips into the room--

And then promptly freezes in place, his eyes widening as he takes in the scene before him. A scene that involves Jay and Roy both buck-ass-naked with Jay working herself on Roy’s dick like her life depends on it, except she’s facing _him_. Or, rather, she’s facing away from Roy, down on her hands and knees as she rocks back and forth on his cock. Her skin is slick with sweat, hair damp where it’s sticking to her face and her shoulders, and, when she looks up and meets his eyes, her mouth drops open as she lets out a filthy moan that shoots right through Wally’s body and down to his own cock.

He stares, transfixed, until Roy’s chuckle breaks him out of it, and his eyes snap up to meet Roy’s. His eyes are dark as he lets his lips curl into a seductive grin and tells him, “Close the door, Wally.”

And Wally, for some unfathomable reason, _does it_ , except he’s closing it behind him as he remains in the room himself, and Roy’s grin stretches wider.

“Good boy,” he purrs, and Wally shudders because, fuck, it’s been so goddamn long since Roy’s said that to him.

Since _anyone_ has said that to him.

Jay interrupts with another wanton moan, and Wally looks over to see that she’s lifted a hand in order to reach down and touch herself.

Fuck.

Oh, _fuck_ , his cock is getting hard already, and it’s--

It’s _wrong_. He’s married, for God’s sake. It doesn’t matter that Linda doesn’t know him right now; she’d agreed to _get_ to know him again. And it’s not like he _wants_ to hang all his hope on them rekindling what they had in that former life, but--

But he loves her, and he made a _vow_ to her. A vow to be faithful and to not give up just because things get tough.

“C’mon, slut,” Roy grunts, and Wally jumps a little, looking back towards him, except Roy’s staring down at Jay’s ass and not at him, and--

_Oh._

“Let Wally see you, hm?” Roy continues, and Jay gasps as she pushes herself up and then settles back into a low kneel, bouncing herself in Roy’s lap as he reaches out and drags his hand down her side before grabbing at her waist to steady her. “Yeah,” he groans, “Just like that, fuck, you love it, don’t you? Love letting Wally watch you fuck yourself on my cock like a damn whore.”

Jay cries out at that, or maybe it’s at the way that Roy’s other hand reaches out and snatches at her hair, tugging her sharply back into a deeper arch that has her trembling all over. Her eyes are hazy when they meet Wally’s again, and she moans as she rubs at her clit even harder.

“That’s it,” Roy groans, and, _fuck_ , Wally can’t stop looking at the long stretch of her body when she’s splayed out for him like that. Can’t stop looking at the way that her tits bounce and her ribs expand with each gasping breath. His gaze traces the path of a bead of sweat rolling down one of her breasts in slow-motion and his cock throbs between his legs. The familiar rumble of Roy’s voice cuts through and he blinks, his tongue darting out to wet his lips, and he gives the most pathetic little whimper.

“Go on, slut,” Roy is saying, his fist curling harder into Jay’s hair as he keeps pulling her back, “Go on and show him what a mess you can make, bitch. Show him what a little whore you are so maybe he’ll let you have his cock. You want that, don’t you? Want Wally to shove his cock inside you and make you take it, want him to stuff you full of come so we all know he’s been there.”

He should leave. Heshouldleaveheshouldleave _heshouldleave_ , oh God.

He should turn around and run, should go shut himself up in his own room so he can stick his hand down his pants and pretend it’s thoughts of Linda that have him ready to burst already. Pretend it’s only because it’s been so _long_ since he’s been with someone else that the temptation feels so strong.

But, fuck. It’s not, it’s not just that.

It’s Roy, too, because Roy has _always_ been able to cut to the core of him, has always known how to push his buttons just right until he’s a whining, desperate mess, and it looks like that’s not something he forgot how to do.

And then there’s Jay.

Jay, who is gorgeous even at the worst of times, but who looks ethereal right now, like she’s fucking _glowing_ from the beautiful blush painting her tanned skin. Who- Who _wants_ him when she barely even knows him all that well - or, at least, it certainly fucking _seems_ that way, because Roy’s words keep drawing these sharp whines from her as she frantically rubs at herself, her wide-eyes locked on Wally as she does.

Jay, who sounds downright _debauched_ as she cries out and comes - no, not even that. Saying that she “comes” barely does it justice when she’s gushing all over Roy’s thighs and her own, squirting into the air in front of her with an intensity that Wally’s only ever seen from Kori before.

His own moan rips out of him at the sight, and his cock is painfully hard now, straining against the confines of his jeans as he watches Jay’s slick fingers drag up her body to grab one of her tits and start squeezing, as he watches the way her chest heaves with every breath as she starts to move even faster on Roy’s cock until he’s bucking his hips up and coming inside her with a tell-tale grunt before he releases her hair with a rough shove that has her crying out again and tumbling back down onto her elbows.

She trembles against him, panting and whining as Roy reaches out to grab her ass, groping at it a few times before he starts to spread her open.

“Good girl,” he practically purrs, somehow still making it sound condescending, and Jay whimpers as she eagerly pushes back into his hands, “God, you’re such a messy little slut, Christ.” He lets go of her, then, and swats at her ass hard enough that the sharp sound of skin impacting against skin fills the room for the space of a heartbeat.

“Get up,” Roy tells her, “Turn around and let Wally see your dirty cunt, bitch. Let him decide if he wants my sloppy seconds.”

Jay’s moan mixes with his own at that, and Wally’s fingers flex as he digs his nails into his thigh. The thought that he should leave returns, but he’s too stunned to listen to it as Jay whines and crawls forward so that Roy’s cock slips out of her with a wet sound. She casts him another desperate look before she turns around, her head bowed as she spreads her legs slightly and pushes her hips back, and Wally bites his tongue as he watches a trail of her slick sliding down her thigh.

Oh, fuck, but he wants to follow it back up to the source with his tongue.

Oh, fuck. Oh, _fuck_.

He wants this, he realizes suddenly. He _wants_ this, wants to take what’s being offered to him. Wants to take this out, this opportunity to _move on_ , but can he? Can he really?

Is it fair to Linda, if he does?

Is it fair to _himself_ , if he _doesn’t?_

Jay moans again, and Wally’s attention snaps back to her and the way she’s reaching under herself to slide two fingers into her cunt and spread it open, causing Roy’s cum to start spilling out of her. Wally’s struck by the sudden and vivid memory of Donna doing the same thing when they were younger, and his hands tremble as he digs his nails in harder.

“C’mon, Wally,” Roy says after a moment, “Are you really gonna leave her waiting like that?”

Jay looks back at him, then, her teeth worrying at her bottom lip and her eyes wide and wet and _pleading_ , and Wally feels all of his control snap in one fell swoop. He barely registers stripping his clothes off and darting forward to stand behind Jay, barely registers swatting her hand away and then dragging the head of his cock through the sticky stream of Roy’s cum before shoving it all back into her along with his dick.

It’s the sound of her startled shout that draws him back, and, shit, yeah, fuck, she probably didn’t even have the chance to see him coming, can probably barely process how quickly he went from standing by the door to _being inside her_ , and Wally strokes over her hip apologetically even as he pulls out and then slams back into her.

“Oh, _fuck_ ,” he groans when she clenches around him and pushes herself back, and Wally reaches out to grab her by the ass, squeezing at those perfect, firm globes as he drags her back to meet his thrusts, “Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck, shit, _ohmyGod_.”

Roy smirks, like the smug bastard he is, and props himself up against the headboard with his arms behind his head and his legs splayed open shamelessly.

“Good boy,” he says again, eyes dancing with mischief, and Wally whines as he slams into Jay even harder, “Go on, give it to her good, Wally. She can take it.”

Jay herself moans at that and pushes back against him as if to prove Roy’s point, and Wally groans when she clenches around him again like an invitation. His hands shift to her hips and he holds on tightly, keeping her held in place as he allows himself to speed up - not _too_ much, though. Not enough to really tap into his actual speed, but it’s still enough to have her gasping out these delicious, sharp sounds with every thrust.

He’d be embarrassed by how quickly he comes, after that, except _it’s been so long_ , okay, and even when it’s just him and his hands, well--

He hasn’t been _this_ turned on in a very long time.

It’s okay, though, really, because he’s still _him_ , and even after he’s worked himself through his orgasm, _he’s still hard_. The way Jay tightens around him as she follows after him helps, too, as does the way Roy keeps running his mouth, telling him to fill Jay up until she’s spilling around him, calling her a slut for letting him come inside her, for getting off on the fact that he _did_.

Fuck.

Taking a page from Roy’s book, Wally reaches for the back of Jay’s head, sliding his fingers into her hair and then pushing down with his palm until she lets her arms go out from under her and slumps face-first against the mattress. He holds her like that for a bit as he keeps thrusting into her, and the sound of his balls slapping against her skin seems obscene when mixed with the quiet mewling noises she’s making and his own harsh panting.

“Yeah, just like that,” Roy grunts, and Wally looks at him again, meeting his heated gaze for a moment before Roy’s drops to trace the steep curve of Jay’s back, “Fucking wreck her cunt, Wally, it’s what a slut like her deserves, isn’t it? She can take more, you know. She gets so fucking _tight_ when you shove your fingers in her, too.”

He and Jay both moan at that, and his cock jerks inside her as she clenches around him again, almost like she wants to prove that she’s already tight enough.

“Fuck,” Wally grunts, and he drags his hand up the slope of her spine, his nails digging in as he goes, “Is that right, Jay? Is my cock not enough for you?”

She whines, pushing back against him as she turns her face so that her cheek is pressed to the mattress. “Please,” she begs, “Please, please, it’s so good, I can take more, please.”

Wally swears under his breath and draws his hand back further, dragging the tip of his index finger down the crack of her ass and making her shiver and moan again. He teases it around the tight pucker of her asshole, and she gasps, her muscles locking up slightly when he nudges it in ever so slightly.

“Oh?” He teases as he shallowly dips that finger in and out, “You want me to stuff you full in both holes, Jay, is that it?” She whines, shaking her head, and Roy chuckles.

“Don’t let her lie to you, Wally,” he says, and she whimpers again, though the minute trembling of her tense muscles subsides when he withdraws and keeps tracing that finger lower, “She’ll take whatever you give her and beg you for more. Nothing’s ever enough for her.”

Jay sobs at that, shaking her head again, and Roy huffs. Wally can’t see him right now, not when he’s watching the way her cunt stretches and drags around his cock, leaving him wet, but he can guess that the other man is rolling his eyes right now.

“Shut up, bitch,” he says, and Jay sobs again before bringing her hand up to cover her mouth, “You know I’m right.”

Wally looks up at Roy, then, staring at him with wide-eyes for a long moment, and, holy _shit_ , it’s so different, hearing Roy talk to someone _else_ like that, when it used to be something reserved for him.

God, he’d never realized quite how harsh it sounded.

No, that’s a lie. He’d known, and he’d craved it exactly like that, reveling in the way it made him feel like he’d do anything to prove he was still worthy.

Roy meets his stare with a challenging look and gestures towards Jay as if to tell him to get on with it, and Wally grits his teeth as he focuses down on her again and starts working the tip of his finger into her alongside his cock. She whines but pushes back dutifully, and Wally pushes it in further, until he’s down to the last knuckle, and then starts sliding it back out. He keeps working at her like that for a while, adding in a second finger when she finally starts to loosen up around him, and Wally can’t help but groan at the way it instantly makes her feel tighter again, his fingers closing the already minimal gap between her slick walls and his cock.

She cries out when he starts vibrating those two digits inside her, the sensation moving through her just as much as it’s stimulating his own dick, and Wally watches as she bites down on her knuckles to keep from making too much noise.

Right. Because Roy told her to shut up, and, _God_ , Wally knows how that goes.

“Fuck, your cunt is amazing,” he tells her, groaning when she clamps around him in response, “So fucking tight, babe, shit. So _wet_ , fuck, bet you’ll be dripping everywhere when I pull out, huh? _Fuck._ ”

Jay practically screams around her own fingers when her orgasm slams into her, leaving her cunt contracting wildly around Wally’s dick and his fingers, and, shit, it’s like a goddamn _vice_ , squeezing around him until she drags him over the edge, too, until he’s coming inside her again with a shout.

He eases back slowly after taking a few long moments to gather his wits, sliding his dick free and then spreading his fingers inside her. She whimpers in response, but she stays put, and Wally pets at her thigh with his other hand as he curls his fingers inside her and strokes at her walls. They’re _soaked_ , soft and so fucking hot to the touch, and Wally almost wants to lament the fact that his cock is actually softening this time, because the temptation to push right back into her is immense. He turns his hand after a moment and then adds a third finger, vibrating them ever so slightly as he quickly fucks them in and out of her until she’s mewling and shaking and coming _again_ , right when Roy tells her to.

She slumps further against the mattress when his fingers finally withdraw, and Wally’s breath stutters as the weight of what just happened starts to crash over him.

“Wally,” Roy cuts in, and Wally’s attention shifts to him almost desperately, seeking the familiar, steadying comfort that he offers, and Roy’s expression softens as he continues, “Get up here, baby. Not gonna let you run from this, Kid.”

Still, he hesitates for a moment, his gaze flicking towards the door before he swallows and steels himself to face whatever fallout may come from this.

He made his choice the second he decided to stay and watch Roy and Jay fuck instead of heading for the hills.

He crawls up onto the bed hesitantly, pausing to help drag Jay up from where she’s still slumped at the foot of it, and he’s surprised when she chooses to curl in against him instead of turning to cuddle up to Roy. Roy, he notices, looks decidedly less surprised, and perhaps even a little pleased as he slides closer and molds himself along Jay’s back. He reaches out to snag Wally by the hair and tugs him closer, kissing him messily, and Wally is left feeling a little dazed when Roy pulls back.

Jay stirs slightly and Roy huffs out a laugh and presses a kiss to the back of her shoulder before settling down again. Wally opens his mouth to--

Well, he’s not sure, exactly. To ask what the Hell just happened? To confirm what he already knows is true: that Roy and Jay planned this? To ask _why_?

“Nap first,” Roy says before he can, though, and his tone doesn’t really leave any room for argument, so Wally just shuts his mouth and gives a short nod.

Roy hums and his hand strokes down Jay’s side before curving around to cup the front of her pussy; she whines quietly but doesn’t react otherwise, not even when he dips lower and starts playing with her and murmuring about how sloppy she is, how he knows she sleeps better with a cunt full of cum.

Wally’s cock gives a little twitch of interest at that, and he groans as he tucks his face into the pillow and squeezes his eyes shut. Roy laughs, the bastard, but he does quiet down, though it does nothing to stop the slick sounds of the way he’s fingering Jay, and he can _feel_ it when she comes, more from the way her body jerks and trembles than anything else, but.

Still.

As he finally lets the post-sex exhaustion creep in, he has one last fleeting thought, and he knows in his bones that it’s true:

_I’m in trouble._

* * *

Jay is all over him the next morning, and it’s slowly driving him mad.

They never did have that talk he was hoping for the night before. Instead, when they woke up from their little post-coital nap, Jay had blown him while Roy fucked her, and then they’d just--

Gone about the rest of their day.

He’d been a fool to think that, maybe, that would be that.

It starts after breakfast, with Jay dropping into his lap where he’s sitting in the living room watching the news, completely unbothered by the fact that they aren’t alone. And, fuck, he’s probably not going to have much anonymity after this, is he? Because Wally’s pretty sure everyone knows she’s Red Hood, and there are really only so many gingers in her life right now. Eventually, someone’s going to tie her to Arsenal, and then they’ll tie Roy to him.

Then again, anyone who wants to disparage him for this is going to be admitting their own involvement, too.

Maybe it’s not the _actual_ anonymity that makes this work.

_Anyway._

It starts with Jay sitting in his lap, shifting constantly like she can’t get comfortable, and maybe that’s how it will look to anyone else, but Wally knows better. Knows because he can feel the way she keeps grinding against his cock, knows because it starts to _stir_ , stiffening up and making him bite down on his cheek to suppress the groans that want to escape every time she shifts again.

Eventually, she slides out of his lap and leans into his side, instead, turning to throw her legs over his lap. She reaches up to put his arm around her shoulders, lets his hand linger _so close_ to one of those perfect, perky breasts, and leans into him, her hair tickling the underside of his chin as she rests against him.

He can feel every point of contact between them, even when none of them are outright sexual, and his dick is still hard from when she was sitting in his lap. Every little puff of breath she lets out ghosts across the hollow of his throat and makes his cock jump with renewed interest, and he can’t _think_ , fuck. He stares at the tv screen, seeing nothing, and jumps when she grinds the palm of her hand against his cock.

His gaze darts around the room, finding it suddenly empty, and she gives him the most devilish grin when he looks down at her. She does it again, and then Wally feels deft fingers working to undo the button of his jeans even through the thin cotton of his robe. He shudders and she leans up, kissing the underside of his chin and letting her bottom lip drag over the slight stubble that covers it. She unzips his jeans and then shifts a little, getting her hand around the outline of his cock and starting to not-quite jerk it off, using just the tips of her fingers, and Wally throws his head back as he tries to keep the groan that escapes low enough that it won’t travel.

She gives a pleased hum at that and continues as she is until Wally’s cock is at full hardness, and then she shifts again, crawling into his lap and lifting the bottom of her robe so that it bunches up. And, _fuck_ , Wally can’t help the vivid flashes of imagery that come to mind then. Images of her with nothing on underneath that robe, images of _him_ with his own pulled up as she sits on his cock with only the excess material of her own covering them from prying eyes.

His hand moves to her back and then slides lower and then lower still until he can slip it beneath all that clean, white material to grope at her ass, and he groans again at the feeling of bare skin against his palm. His fingers wander, finding the thin sliver of material riding up her ass and then following it down, and she whines against his throat.

Wally feels his control snap as if in slow-motion, and then he’s zipping down the hall with Jay clinging tightly to him, her arms around his shoulders and her legs around his waist. He practically tosses her onto his bed after slamming the door shut, and he watches her bounce for a moment before he’s on top of her, kissing her desperately as he reaches for the bottom of her robe and pushes it up with both hands.

Jay moans, a little breathless, as she gets one hand in his hair and slides the other down the back of his shirt, her nails biting into the tightly-corded muscles of his back. She raises her hips to grind against him once the robe is past her hips, and Wally lets go of it in favour of dragging his hands down her thighs and then spreading them open wider. He pulls back, ignoring her whine of complaint, and looks down at her, his cock jerking again when he sees that he was right; she’s not wearing anything underneath except her underwear, not even another one of her skimpy little skirts, and he groans as he drags his thumb up the thin material of her thong.

 _Christ,_ she’s already wet enough that he can feel it.

He pulls back again, long enough to strip himself with more than a little help from the speedforce, and then helps her struggle out of her own robe. She blinks up at him when he peels the domino from her eyes, and Wally dips in to kiss her again as he slides his hands beneath her to undo the clasp of her bra. He pulls it off of her, tossing it aside as he leans down to get his mouth on one of them, his teeth nipping and tugging at her nipple for a moment before he swirls his tongue all around the areola. He gropes at the other tit with one hand, squeezing it firmly and drawing a groan from her as he flicks his tongue over the hardened nub of her nipple.

He pinches at the other one, then, rolling it between his fingers until it, too, is hard, and then he sits up and stares down at her, watches the pink flush on her skin as it spreads down her neck and onto her chest. Her chest rises and falls a little quicker than it normally would, and Jay licks her lips as she looks up at him through wide eyes.

“Wally,” she whimpers, rolling her hips up against him, and Wally groans as his attention is drawn south again. He doesn’t bother with finesse, snapping the elastic on either side of her underwear and tearing them off of her, and then he grabs his own cock, dragging the head of it up through her slit before grinding it against her clitoris.

She gasps, throwing her head back and moaning when he does it again before he drags his cock back down to the opening of her cunt.

“Tell me if I misunderstood,” he growls, straining to keep himself from simply pushing forward into all that waiting heat, “Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll stop.”

“Don’t you dare,” Jay grunts as she rolls her hips again, pushing down against him so the head of his cock starts to press against her entrance. She shifts, starting to roll over, and Wally growls as he pushes her back down.

He starts to press forward, groaning her name, and she freezes, yelping out a _‘wait!’_ that has him freezing, too.

“Don’t,” she starts, and she sounds so… uncertain, “Don’t you want me to turn over?”

Wally frowns down at her, and she grimaces, turning her face away as she reaches up to hold onto his shoulders.

“N-nevermind,” she mutters, “Just, Roy always…”

She trails off, and that uncertainty seems to linger. It makes him frown harder, because it just seems. Off.

That’s never really been Roy’s MO before - the bastard loves kissing too damn much to only ever fuck from behind.

He must take too long to answer, because Jay seems to wilt beneath him, her breath turning shivery with impending distress, and Wally shakes his head. He leans in and kisses at the hinge of her jaw as he grinds against her again, and she shudders, turning to look at him with a questioning gaze.

“No,” he says firmly, his gaze going dark with arousal, “I want to see your face when I make you scream for me, Jay.”

She whines sharply at that, eyes brightening, and Wally takes the distraction and uses it to slam into her in one hard thrust so that he’s completely bottomed out inside her.

She _does_ scream for him, then, her nails biting into his shoulders as she throws her head back and shouts out her pleasure.

 _Fuck,_ she’s just as warm as she was yesterday, if a little less wet and a little tighter, a little less worked-over and pre-used, and Wally’s moan rips out of him as she squeezes around him.

Wally presses himself down over her as he starts to pull out, licking his way up her throat before kissing her, and she whimpers into his mouth as she rakes a hand up the back of his neck and fists it into his hair.

He fucks her more slowly than he did the day before, letting her really feel every inch of his cock as it drags out of her and then pushes back in, and she lifts her legs after a few seconds, wrapping them around his waist and crossing her ankles. He fucks his tongue into her mouth as he kisses her, swallowing every little noise that she makes, and braces himself above her with one hand as the other slips between them to grope one of her tits.

She pushes up into his grip with a whine, and Wally tears himself away from their kisses in order to suck a mark into her neck as he keeps fucking into her at that near-maddeningly slow pace. She rocks up against him, trying to take him faster, and Wally brushes his thumb over her nipple a few times before he pinches it between two fingers and starts tugging. She arches up into him with a cry at that, tugging slightly at his hair in response, and Wally swears as he lets himself move a little faster.

He sits back, smirking at the way she whines beneath him and drops her arms to splay uselessly above her head.

“Gorgeous,” he coos, watching as her cheeks darken and her eyes go wide and wondering. He reaches down, getting a hand on each of her breasts and pushing down as he fucks into her even harder. Her cunt clenches around him as she moans, and Wally grunts as he has to work a little harder to keep going when she feels so impossibly tight.

He squeezes her tits and then shoves them together, groaning at the thought of fucking his cock in between them and coming all over her throat. His hips stutter briefly as the image before him seems to shift, memories of having Linda beneath him just like that coming to mind, and he clenches his jaw as he pushes them away.

_Not now._

He can’t think of her right now when he’s got his cock up another woman’s cunt.

He doesn’t realise that his grip has tightened, too, in his frustration, not until Jay actually whimpers and shifts uncomfortably beneath him, and he lets her go immediately.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he murmurs, and she just blinks up at him, her lips pulled into a smile that seems to tremble slightly.

“It’s okay,” she says, and then arches up to push her chest out, “Y-you can. Whatever you want.”

Wally swears, his hips stuttering again as his cock jerks, and Jay’s eyes go wide as she throws her head back.

“Whatever you want,” she gasps again, “You can- Can pull on them, or slap them, or, or- _anything_. Oh, fuck, _Wally_ , please. Pleasepleaseplease.”

A fresh wave of arousal washes over him, leaving Wally flushed and panting as he starts to fuck her faster, and he reaches down to start rubbing over her clit.

“Is that what you want?” He grits out, “You want me to hurt your pretty tits, Jay? Want me to slap them around until my handprint’s branded into them?”

She moans loudly, the noise coming out more like a keen, and her cunt contracts around him, squeezing so tight it’s almost painful, and Wally groans when she comes, gushing over his cock and easing the slide of it inside her trembling, wet passage.

“Fuck,” he swears, his eyes blown wide open as he stares down at her and keeps going, fucking her right through the aftershocks until she’s whimpering and mewling beneath him.

He lifts one hand while the other continues to work almost aggressively over her clit, and then reaches out to do exactly as he’d teased, slapping at the side of one of her tits and making it jiggle as she cries out. He does it again before switching to the other and repeating the action a few times, and Jay gives a sharp cry when he switches to pinching hard at one of her nipples, pressing down as if he means to crush it between his thumb and his forefinger.

She comes again when he finally releases it, and, this time, he follows along after her when her cunt contracts around him. His cock pulses inside her, slicking up the inside of her cunt with his cum, and Jay moans as she pushes her hips harder against him like she’s trying to get him in even deeper. He fucks her through it until they’re both panting and gasping for breath, and then Wally leans in to kiss her as he wraps an arm around her back and lifts her up. Her legs tighten around him and she yelps when he spins them around and leans back against the headboard, his legs splaying out in front of him as he helps her settle into her new position in his lap.

Wally drags his hands down her sides until he can grab her hips and he starts guiding her into rolling her hips until she gets the idea and starts doing it herself.

“Good girl,” he praises, and she whimpers. There’s something almost hesitant in her eyes when she leans in to kiss him again, but Wally meets it eagerly, nipping and tugging at her bottom lip with his teeth before kissing her properly as she settles into a quick rhythm in his lap. He lets her get used to it for a few long moments and then, with a smirk that he buries against her throat, his cock starts to vibrate.

She cries out, hips stuttering for a moment before she pulls herself together, but soft little puffs of air keep escaping her lips as she rides him. Wally gets his hands on her upper back, digging his nails into her skin and then gently raking them down, and she gives the most deliciously wanton moan Wally thinks he’s ever heard.

“Jesus, Jay,” he grunts as he drops his hands lower and grabs her ass, gripping tightly as he drags her in against him over and over again, “You’re so fucking hot, fucking shit. Look at you, holy shit.”

She whimpers in response, her eyes oddly wet when she looks at him, and he squeezes her ass even harder and then drags her in, holding her tight against him as he vibrates his cock faster inside her. He holds her down as she tries to squirm, her voice rising in pitch with each passing second as she reaches out to claw at his shoulders and grinds forward against his pelvis.

When Wally finally lets go with one hand and reaches between them to press two fingers to her clit and starts vibrating them, too, she doesn’t last more than a few seconds, and her scream seems to reverberate off the walls of the room as she comes. True to his word, Wally’s gaze stays locked on her face, taking in every shift in her expression as pleasure overtakes her senses, every drop of sweat that beads up at her hairline and starts to roll down. Every inch of the blush that darkens her cheeks and spreads steadily lower.

“That’s it,” he says, “Good girl, just like that. Fucking beautiful, Jay, you’re so good.”

She gives a sound not unlike a sob right before she slumps against him, and Wally chuckles as he grabs her hips again, easily picking her up and dragging her back down, punching desperate little cries out of her as he fucks her cunt down over his cock until his own orgasm crashes over him. Jay trembles against him as he spills inside of her, mouthing at his throat and his chest like she can’t help herself, and Wally folds himself around her when he finally comes down from his high. He buries his face against her neck and sucks another mark there, and she shudders and whines, clenching around his sensitive cock in a way that makes him gasp against her skin.

It’s a few minutes before either of them has the energy to move, but, finally, Jay lifts herself off of him with shaking limbs, and Wally has just enough time to catch a trickle of thick, white cum leaking from her cunt before she drops down on her back next to him and gives a breathless laugh.

“Holy shit,” she says, and Wally smirks.

“Another satisfied rider of the Speedster Express,” he quips, and Jay laughs and then rolls over on her side to look at him.

“Oh, God, you’re a dork,” she groans, an expression of feigned betrayal on her face, and Wally laughs, too, as he stretches himself out next to her.

“That’s over a decade of friendship with your brother for you,” he says, and her face scrunches up cutely.

“Please don’t talk about Dickhead when I’m still full of your cum.”

Wally laughs again and then pulls her in against him, and Jay flicks at his nipple with the back of one of her nails.

“Alright, fine,” he concedes before kissing his way down the side of her neck lazily, his tongue flicking out over some of the marks he’d left earlier, and Jay gives a breathy little sigh as she squirms to get more comfortable and then lets herself relax. The skin beneath his lips changes suddenly from smooth to rough, and Wally pulls back slightly, eyes seeking out the discrepancy. And, of course, it isn’t like he didn’t know it was there, but, somehow, in this moment between them, it’s like he’s seeing the scar across her throat in a whole new light.

There had never been any doubt that someone had tried to slit her throat, but it had never been his place, before, to ask. To seek to know more. The who, and the when, and the why.

But. Maybe he can, now.

Maybe he should.

He brings a hand up to gently cup her throat and lets his thumb trace up and down over the scar.

“What happened?” He asks, his voice hushed. Jay’s lashes flutter for a moment, and she turns her head, facing away from him. It puts even more of the scar on display as Wally slowly pulls his hand back -- a jagged, ugly thing that every shift of her neck pulls at it.

“Bruce,” she breathes.

Wally freezes, but it’s not… disbelief, not really. Surprise, maybe. He hopes she can see that, hopes he isn’t making her feel doubted. It’s a lot to take in, is all. A wound like that… That isn’t attacking to subdue, not with someone like Bruce who prides himself on not making mistakes in battle.

On top of all that, it’s far too healed to have been from that most recent fight they’d had, that vicious beatdown across the Gotham skyline after Jay had shot the Penguin.

“When?” He asks finally, and Jay gives a soft sigh as he brushes his thumb along the length of the scar again.

“When I first came back.”

Oh.

Wally doesn’t breath a sigh of relief, but it’s a very near thing. It’s still strange to him that Bruce would attack in such a way, but, then-

Well, he remembers, too, how Jay had tried to kill Tim back then, and he can’t blame the man for wanting vengeance for his child.

“He didn’t know,” he says, and it almost comes out as if he’s trying to reassure himself; he knows he’s misstepped when Jay tenses next to him and then lets out a dry laugh.

“No,” she disagrees, “He knew exactly who I was.”

It doesn’t make sense, it really doesn’t. Wally was there, in the aftermath; he watched as Bruce and Dick both fell apart over Jay’s death. The thought that Bruce could attack her like that while knowing who she was, that he could look at his beloved daughter returned from the dead and strike as if to send her back--

It’s baffling.

Wally would sooner slit his own throat if someone put Irey in front of him right now.

“But he’s your dad,” Wally finds himself saying, and he immediately regrets it, wincing as the words hang in the air between them. After a few tense moments, Jay gives a wet laugh that sounds, to Wally, more like a sob.

“I think that’s just how dads are,” she says, and then she sniffs harshly, as if to hold back her tears.

Wally nuzzles at her jaw and thinks about his own father, a shudder wracking through him at the barrage of memories, and he frowns. He tips his head down to rest against her shoulder and lets out a shaky breath.

“Yeah,” he agrees, “I think so, too.”

Jay is quiet for a moment, but it’s the kind of quiet that you just know means more is coming. After a moment, she turns onto her side to face him, and her hand settles warm against his cheek as his own moves to rest at the small of her back.

“Maybe not all dads,” she says, and Wally’s heart pangs in his chest as he shuts his eyes against the flare of heat that he knows precedes tears. Her lips brush over his cheek before she ducks lower to cuddle into his chest, and Wally’s arm tightens around her reflexively.

“Will you tell me about them?” She asks, and then rushes to add, “Someday. It doesn’t have to be right now.”

Wally presses a kiss to the crown of her head and then lingers there, breathing in the scent of her shampoo.

“Someday,” he agrees finally, and he feels her give a small nod.

Neither of them says any more after that, and it’s nice, really, to just lie there in each other’s company. It’s how Roy finds them an hour or so later, and, just for a moment, Wally feels himself tense, like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting for Roy to start shouting at him for sleeping with his girlfriend or to start throwing punches.

But he doesn’t. If anything, his expression is soft -- fond -- as he looks at them, and his hands twitch at the hem of his shirt as if he wants to tear it off and then join them in bed, but he doesn’t.

“C’mon,” he says instead, “Lunch.”

* * *

Jay slips away after lunch for a session in the Chamber, and Wally and Roy end up in Wally’s room, snacking on overly-buttered popcorn and browsing Netflix.

They’re halfway through some comedy special Wally’s only been half-processing when he shoves the empty bowl aside and nudges at Roy’s thigh with his toe.

“So,” he says, and Roy turns to him and raises an eyebrow.

“So,” he parrots.

Wally frowns, and then shifts to sit up and face Roy properly.

“So,” he starts again, “About… earlier.” Roy just raises his brow higher, and Wally feels his cheeks flush. He grits his teeth, and then he forces himself to keep going.

“How are you not pissed at me?”

Roy blinks, slow in a way that looks judgmental instead of confused, and Wally frowns.

“Pissed about what?”

“I don’t know, Roy,” Wally snaps, “Maybe the fact that I fucked your girlfriend.”

He’s not really sure what he’s expecting from Roy following that, but he knows it isn’t the way his friend outright _laughs_ , loud and boisterous with his head thrown back. Wally can’t help feeling a little offended, if he’s being honest.

 _“Roy,”_ he snaps, and Roy huffs and tries to reign himself in.

“Dude,” he says finally, “Jay is _not_ my girlfriend. Jesus, don’t be absurd.” It’s Wally’s turn to blink at him, his brows pulling together in confusion, and Roy rolls his eyes. “It’s not like that, Walls, seriously. We’re just having fun.” He shrugs, and lets his gaze drift back towards the tv screen.

“So you’re, what?” Wally asks, throwing his hands up to make air quotes, “Friends with benefits, or something?”

“Or something,” Roy agrees, and then he sighs, “Look, Jay’s my best friend, but this… thing between us, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just convenient, you know?” He looks at Wally again, frowning slightly, “Back when we had our whole Outlaws thing going on, she’d join Kori and I sometimes. Then Kori was gone, and it was just the two of us. It made more sense than trying to have one night stands with unsuspecting civilians.”

Wally cocks his head at that, considering it, and, well, it’s not like Roy’s _wrong_. Hell, wasn’t that what they’d been doing with the other Titans for years when they were younger?

(No. No, it wasn't. They had loved each other in their own ways, Wally knows it in his bones.)

“Jay tried that, actually,” Roy goes on, “Then the Joker went after the poor girl, and Jay swore she’d never try it again. It made sense to offer my, ah, _services_ , if you know what I mean.”

He gives an obnoxious wink at that, and Wally huffs out a laugh and then stretches back out, dropping his head onto Roy’s stomach and forcing the air from his lungs.

“Gotcha,” he says, and Roy flicks at his forehead.

“Rude ass bitch,” he grumbles, and Wally feels his lips turn up in a small smile.

So he hadn’t ruined one of his oldest friendships, then.

Not this one, at least, though he's sure that the jury is still out on how Dick will react to Wally fucking his little sister.

Or does Dick even consider her that anymore?

A strange feeling of sadness slams into him at that thought, and Wally forces himself to push it from his mind.

Jay’s family problems are hers to deal with; Wally has more than enough of his own already.

"Anyway," Roy pipes up again after a while, "Be awfully hypocritical to be pissed when I set you up in the first place."

Wally frowns, a spark of anger flaring up at the reminder.

"Yeah," he agrees curtly, and then, "What the fuck was that about, anyway?"

Roy shrugs, looking completely unbothered, like he hasn't created the perfect storm to tear apart the last threads keeping him together.

"I saw you watching her," he says, "Figured you needed a push to start moving on. S'why you're here, isn't it?"

Wally's frown deepens as he thinks that over. He's not ready to touch the first part, not willing to explain that whatever Roy saw, it wasn't like _that_ , but the second part…

Is that really what he's doing? Getting help to move on as opposed to learning to just cope with it? Did he come here because, subconsciously, he knew he needed to let Linda go?

He shifts uncomfortably, pulling away from Roy to lay next to him, and Roy sighs.

"Wally," he starts, but he quiets when Wally turns his head to glare at him.

"She’s my _wife_ , Roy," he hisses, and Roy looks at him for a long moment; the pity in his gaze is stifling.

"Was," Roy says quietly, "She _was_ your wife."

Wally blinks rapidly as tears start to well in his eyes, and he rolls over, turning his back to Roy, who sighs again.

His words bounce around in Wally's mind, and he curls around himself as a few tears slip free. It's a few minutes before Roy sighs once more and then curls himself around Wally's back, holding him tightly as Wally lets out a sob.

"I'm sorry, Wally," he murmurs, "I know it hurts, but you deserve to move on."

Wally reaches up to scrub at his eyes, and he shakes his head in denial, though no protest passes his lips.

Linda's face is there waiting for him behind his eyelids when he closes his eyes again, and Wally gives another quiet sob at the tears that stream down her face as she reaches out to take Jai and Irey's hands into her own. She looks at him for a long moment and then shakes her head as she turns and starts to walk away.

The confusion on Jai's face when he looks back at him over his shoulder breaks Wally's heart all over again.

And then he's alone, dropping to his knees in the dark as he cries and tugs at his hair. It feels like forever that he stays that way before a light touch on his cheek has him lifting his head and looking up in desperate hope, but it isn't Linda kneeling before him.

* * *

Wally wakes up when a knock sounds on the door a while later, and he finds himself tensing up. He relaxes, however, at the hesitant sound of Jay’s voice asking if she can come in.

It’s Roy who gets up to let her in, even though it's Wally's bedroom, and Wally watches as she seems to list towards him immediately. He can feel the lump in his own throat when Roy first takes her shaking hands between his own to steady them and then pulls back to carefully peel away her domino mask. He watches her heave a shuddering breath as Roy drags her into his chest and then bends to sweep her into a bridal carry and thinks that, for a woman as tall and broad as she is, Jay looks _small_ like this, folded up and trembling in Roy’s arms as she is.

Roy carries her over to the bed and Wally scoots over without a word, heart aching as he watches his friend sit down and stare sadly at the woman cradled in his arms. She shifts, her breath catching in an unmistakable sob, and Roy adjusts his hold on her until she’s straddling his lap with her face tucked into the crook of his neck and Roy’s hands rubbing up and down her back.

Wally exchanges a look with Roy over her shoulder, his face twisted up in uncertainty, but Roy just smiles sadly and then presses his lips to the crown of Jay’s head before he reaches a hand out to Wally, who holds onto it like a lifeline.

He finds himself drawing closer as Jay’s soft sobbing slows into sniffles and hiccuping breaths, and it’s almost natural, the way the three of them end up cuddled up in his bed with Jay nestled snugly between them.

Wally isn’t sure how much time passes before Roy’s phone rings, but he knows it can’t have been even an hour yet since Jay turned up at his door. He’s not exactly surprised when Roy answers it, but he is surprised when Roy sits up, the movement pulling a whine of annoyance - or perhaps it’s not annoyance, perhaps it’s something _else_ \- from Jay.

“Donna, hey,” he says as he picks up, and there’s no mistaking the softness in his voice, just like there’s no mistaking the way Jay’s breathing seems to stop for a moment. Roy pauses, listening for a moment, and then stands up. He doesn’t so much as look back as he walks away, but his voice still rings out before the bedroom door closes behind him.

“Nah, I can talk. I’m not doing anything right now.”

Jay gives the barest of flinches, and Wally’s sure he only feels it because, spooned together like they are, that millisecond of movement stretches out so much longer in his own perception.

_Interesting._

Before he can muse on it any further, Jay turns and curls closer to him, looking up at him with the most played-up pout twisting her lips.

“Looks like it’s just the two of us, then,” she says, and her lashes cast delicate shadows along the tops of her cheeks as she bats her eyes at him. She bites her lip, and Wally’s mouth feels dry as his gaze zeros in on the little indent her teeth are leaving in it.

He has the most fleeting of thoughts that tells him that it’s odd, isn’t it, that her mood can switch so very rapidly, but then her lips are on his, and Wally isn’t thinking about much of anything for a while.

It isn’t until hours later, when he’s laying awake and his thoughts have skipped back to the afternoon, that Wally really starts to consider Jay’s response.

It could have just been that she was upset that Roy would consider comforting her to be “not doing anything,” as he’d implied to Donna (and even Wally can admit that that was a dick move), but Wally isn’t so sure that that’s all there is to it. He considers his earlier thoughts on how the two revolve around each other and his mistaken assumption that they were dating, and then he thinks about what it’s like to be around Roy, to spend as much time in his presence as Jay has, and how overwhelming it can be to have all of that focus and easy affection aimed at you. He considers the softness that enters Jay’s eyes when she looks at Roy and the sheer devotion that comes through when she’s trying so eagerly to please and impress him in the bedroom.

It’s easy to draw the conclusion that Jay, at least to some extent, is in love with Roy - and, really, who isn’t, Wally asks himself. You can’t spend that kind of time together and _not_ wind up giving a piece of your heart to Roy Harper. It surprises Wally, a little, the way that his heart pangs not just with sympathy, but with _pity_ for Jay.

Because he knows that Roy doesn’t feel the same, and he doesn’t doubt that Jay knows it, too, not if the way she reacted to Roy taking Donna’s call earlier is any indication.

How can she stand it? How can she stand to stay by his side, to share his _bed_ , when he’s busy chasing someone else, uninterested in the heart held out in offering by Jay’s own hands?

Well, Wally supposes, it might not be so far off from what the future has in store for him, if he really does intend to grow closer to the Linda of this timeline without any expectations. Could he stand by and watch her fall in love and start a family with someone else? Would he rather have a piece of her than have nothing at all?

But, then, as difficult and painful as it would be, Wally thinks he could grin and bear it - but not if Linda was calling him to her bed every other day, too. It would break his heart every bit as much as losing her, Jai, and Irey the first time had.

He wonders, knowing how similar she and her eldest brother can be (how similar _all_ of Bruce’s “children” are, in this, and isn’t it just _sad_ how Bruce has shaped them by withholding his love and trust the way that he does?), how often she tells herself that she can win Roy over, that if she can just be _better_ , just give him _more_ , then perhaps he will love her back. He wonders, too, if that means she blames some shortcoming in herself for why it hasn’t worked yet.

He frowns as he follows that thought further, shifting uncomfortably on his bed as he wonders about her motivations with _him_. Wonders if she’s hoping to make Roy jealous, somehow, or if she’s just so desperate to be _seen_ that she’s willing to accept the attention that Wally is giving her. Perhaps she thinks that Roy’s own fondness for Wally will endear her to him even more if she and Wally are on good terms.

But, then, Jay is _smart_. She has to know that there was nothing to be gained by coming to Wally behind closed doors when Roy isn’t there, too. Has to know that Roy isn’t really the jealous type, anyway.

So, then. Why?

Another option presents itself to him, and Wally’s gut twists with discomfort.

Could it be that watching Roy walk away as she failed to capture and hold his attention had left her feeling that she hadn’t _done enough_? That she hadn’t given him a _reason_ to stay?

Had she thought that, if she didn’t give away some piece of herself, that Wally wouldn’t stay with her, either?

One final thought sits uncomfortably in his mind as he tosses and turns that night, making guilt poke and prod at him:

Is it possible that Jay is sleeping with Roy - and, by extension, himself - not because it’s the only way she thinks _she_ can have _him_ , but because she believes it to be the only way _Roy_ will keep _her_?

* * *

Wally resolves in the morning to pay a little more attention to the way things are between Jay and Roy, and he tells himself it’s so that he doesn’t get himself caught in the middle of it.

Now that he’s looking, it’s so easy to see.

He wasn’t wrong, per se, when he noticed the way they gravitate towards one another, but it might have been an oversimplification. Jay seems to orbit _around_ Roy more than they gravitate _towards_ each other.

That’s not to say that Roy is entirely passive, of course. Wally notices many times the way Roy will put himself between Jay and anyone they cross paths with and the way that Roy’s hands consistently find themselves at home on Jay’s hips, or the way his arm winds around her waist or her shoulders whenever they find themselves side-by-side.

He notices the way Jay never wanders too far from where Roy is, unless it’s for one of them to visit the Chamber or use the washroom. Notices, too, the way that she always finds herself back at Roy’s side before long and the way that she looks up at him like she has stars in her eyes.

But Wally also notices the way that it’s like a flip has switched every time the air around them becomes charged with the electricity of sexual tension. He watches the way the care and gentility in Roy’s touch evaporates away, watches the way Roy goes from attentive and doting to being unable to look into Jay’s eyes and the way she tries so hard to win him back, to gain his approval even as he pushes, and pushes, and _pushes_ , until she’s left completely wrung out. He also notices the way it’s always himself, and not Roy, that she cuddles up to after sex, as if she’s already come to accept that Roy has nothing to spare for her in those moments (and he wonders, too, what happens when he’s not there).

Wally doesn’t notice, at first, the way that he starts trying to make up for it.

It isn’t an entirely conscious decision, the way he begins to lavish kisses upon her and hold her against him like a lover more than a friend. The way that he murmurs praise in counterpoint to Roy’s degradation and goading and makes an effort to actually meet her eyes when he fucks her.

By the time he notices, he thinks taking it away would only do more damage than continuing the way he has been.

* * *

It keeps nagging at him, though, now that he’s noticed it. It’s like every time he looks at them, he can see the imbalance that’s at play. Can see the devotion in Jay’s eyes and the heartbreak in her smile, can see the way that hope sparks up in her eyes and then fades away again every time Roy’s lips brush absently over her temple, every time he rolls her over in bed and mounts her. Every time Roy kisses _him_ , _praises_ him, but can’t spare an ounce of gentility for her.

He watches as Roy practically stares right through her one morning when she cooks them breakfast and brings it back to Roy’s bedroom for them to enjoy together, and Wally makes sure that he thanks her, smothers her with kisses of gratitude until she’s giggling and the disappointment has left her eyes.

But he watches, too, as Roy holds her close when she’s falling apart, as he jokes and spars with her until they’re collapsed in a laughing heap on the ground and Roy cranes his neck to steal a kiss. He watches Jay hold Roy’s shaking hands, watches her press her lips to the crook of his elbows, kissing over long-faded puncture marks, and takes in the way he looks at her like she’s some sort of miracle. In moments like that, Wally thinks he might be able to believe that Roy loves her back.

It’s confusing, he decides, like something important keeps getting lost in translation.

* * *

Time seems to pass both more quickly than Wally had expected, and so very slowly at the same time. But, then, Wally has always had such a strange relationship with time.

It’s hard to fathom that he’s been at Sanctuary for a week and a half already, though. He tries to imagine what it might have been like without Roy and Jay there to share this journey with, and Wally feels his chest go tight with anxiety every time.

It’s strange, really, given how little any of them talk about what they’re doing there, yet the feeling that they’re all in this together is unshakeable. It’s there in the way they all know that they can come together after a difficult session in the Chamber, or even just when the pain and sadness gets to be too much to bear. It’s in the shared heat of their bodies as they spend time curled together, the time they spend holding onto each other to keep them from shaking apart.

Slowly, Wally finds himself beginning to interact more and more with other people, though he keeps his identity held so very close to his chest. Most of the others are the same, but there are some who aren’t, and Wally envies them. Envies the way that they can seek help so openly, can let those around them see them and know that they are not as okay as might have been believed.

He’s surprised, one morning, when he finds Jay sitting outside next to a woman with long red hair. There is a certain tension in the set of both of their shoulders, and yet they sit side-by-side with their hands linked as they watch the sunrise together.

“Gotham isn’t a kingdom to be ruled,” he hears the woman say, “He doesn’t speak for her.”

Jay sighs softly, the fingers of her free hand curling into the meat of her thigh, and Wally silently slips back into the house, leaving the two women to their camaraderie.

It isn’t so difficult, really, to place the woman, especially not when he sees the way she draws the green towards her the next time he spots her walking outside, and Wally tries to ignore the itch under his skin at the thought that this is a place where heroes and villains might walk hand in hand.

But, then. Well.

Some people would call Jay a villain, too.

Wally should know; he was one of those people once.

* * *

The next afternoon finds the three of them out on the vast grounds of Sanctuary’s property, far enough away from the house that they’re unlikely to be disturbed. There’s a blanket spread beneath them on the ground, a picture-perfect scene complete with a picnic basket and everything.

Or, it would be picture perfect if not for the way Wally’s hand has slid up under Jay’s skirt and down into her panties as she leans back against his chest. He starts out slow, teasing her with light strokes up and down her slit and slow thrusts of his fingers when he finally breaches her, working her up until her chest is heaving with her panting breaths before he really starts fucking her on them. She mewls softly and tries to close her legs when he finally starts to speed up, and Wally chuckles as he drops a kiss behind her ear.

“Shh,” he murmurs, “You’re doing so good, sweetheart. So good for me, letting me play with your pussy whenever I want.” She whimpers at that, trembling around him and growing wetter with her arousal, and Wally groans. “Shh,” he says again, intentionally grinding the heel of his palm against her clit to make her whine, “You don’t want anyone to hear and come looking, do you?”

Roy chuckles from across the blanket, looking up from the arrows he's fletching to shoot a glance their way.

“She’d like that,” he says, and Jay whimpers again, her cheeks turning a deep pink as she squeezes her eyes shut. She doesn’t, Wally notices, deny it.

“Let them come,” Roy continues, eyes simmering with heat as he looks up to meet Wally’s gaze, “We’ll line them up and let them all have a go at her.”

Jay gasps, her cunt clenching tight around Wally’s fingers as her leg jerks and the muscles in her stomach jump. Slick gushes against his fingers as she comes, and Wally chuckles as he curls them inside her to massage against her g-spot and draw her pleasure out. She gives a sharp cry at that, raising her hand to cover her mouth, and Roy chuckles as he goes back to his work, muttering _‘slut’_ under his breath.

Wally hums, rubbing at her until she finally relaxes against him again, still trembling slightly and making these delicious little gasping sounds as she rolls her hips as if to coax him into moving again.

“You want more?” Wally asks lowly, and she glances up at him with shining eyes as she gives a hesitant nod. He smiles and reaches up with his other hand to move her own away from her mouth. “Use your words, then,” he says, and she blushes deeper as she blinks up at him.

“Please,” she begs quietly, her voice rising in pitch as Wally’s fingers start to vibrate right up against all those sensitive nerves, “Pleasepleaseplease, more, fuck, Wally, pleaseit’ssogood.”

Roy shifts slightly in the corner of Wally’s eye and he looks up in time to see him adjusting himself in his pants. It makes him smirk as he looks down at Jay again and starts to thrust his fingers so, so slowly. She groans in frustration, her expression darkening into a glare for a brief moment before she tips her head back and moans when Wally speeds up without warning.

“Oh,” she gasps, her thighs trembling as she weakly tries to close them around his hand, “Oh, oh, _oh_ , please, yes, morepleaseohfuckyesyesyes.”

Roy groans, tossing aside the arrow he was working on, and rounds on them, crawling over and forcing her legs apart as he settles himself between them. He reaches down to tug her panties to the side, and Jay gasps, her eyes going wide as she looks up at Roy even though he only seems to have eyes for where Wally’s fingers are dragging in and out of her with slick, obscene sounds.

“C’mon, slut,” he grits out, “You can go again, just like this, can’t you?”

Jay whimpers, one hand flying out to grip at the blanket beneath them, and she bites hard at her lip to stifle a scream when Wally’s other hand joins the first, two fingers pressing against her clit and starting to vibrate against it.

“Do it,” Roy growls a few seconds later, and Jay tightens around him once more as she comes with a sharp gasp, shaking all over as Wally fucks her through it with his fingers. She’s still trembling when he finally stops, one hand sliding up to rub her belly as Wally lifts the other to his mouth and starts licking his fingers clean with a low groan.

He looks at Roy as he does and can’t help but shudder at the intense look on the other man’s face as he stares down at Jay’s dripping cunt and licks his lips. She shivers, giving a quiet whimper when he drags his thumb down her slit and then nudges it into her.

He pulls back after a moment, hooking his thumbs under the band of her underwear and tugging them down, and Wally swallows hard as Roy pulls them off and tosses them aside before he lays himself down between Jay’s legs. Her skirt drapes haphazardly over his head as he ducks beneath it, and Jay jolts as she gives a loud cry. Wally’s own cock jerks where it’s trapped inside his jeans, and he reaches down, shoving his fingers into her mouth to quiet her as Roy eats her out.

He can’t see much, but he can _hear_ it, and Wally shudders as he lazily fucks Jay’s mouth with his fingers until she’s drooling around them with her thighs pressed tight around Roy’s head. Her eyes are wet and dazed as she looks up at him, not quite managing to focus on his face, and Wally grunts as he shifts to grind against her.

Fuck.

His gaze drifts down to Roy again as Jay’s garbled moans grow sharper and more desperate, and he reaches out to flip her skirt up so he can watch the way Roy pulls back to suck on her clit as he slides two fingers into her to replace his tongue. His gaze flicks up for a moment, meeting Wally’s from beneath his lashes, before he groans and focuses back on his self-assigned mission.

If he had to guess, Wally would say Roy has drawn three more orgasms from her before he finally pulls back, dragging the back of his wrist over his slick face as he sits up, and Wally almost wants to roll his eyes. Of course, Roy had to prove that he can still please her the best. Honestly, it’s little things like that that make him wonder if there’s something more going on for him to be so possessive.

But that’s a thought for another time, when Jay isn’t panting and trembling in his lap, too fucked out to register much beyond the cadence of their voices as Wally murmurs to her that she did so well for them. He watches with wide-eyes as Roy whips his cock out, jerking at it a handful of times before he’s coming all over Jay’s pussy with a grunt, and he lets out a low hiss of his own as he grinds against her again. He’s so fucking hard, and he has been for what feels like forever. The material of his boxers is sticky with precum and Wally shifts uncomfortably, making Roy look up at him again. His lips quirk into a smug grin, and Wally shivers.

“You gonna make a mess of her too, Wally?” He asks - goads, really - and Wally tries for a glare, but it’s half-hearted at best. Roy just laughs, and leans back with his hands behind him to support himself, “Go on, then. Get yourself off with her, slut, you’ve earned it, haven’t you?”

Wally feels himself flush all over, his head spinning a little with his arousal and how hard he is, and he shoots Roy one last dark look before he shifts himself out from behind Jay, laying her down gently before he pops the button on his jeans and yanks his zipper down. He only shoves his pants and boxers down low enough to take his cock out, and he’s panting before he even gets his hand around himself.

Jay’s lashes flutter as her head lolls to the side, and Wally groans as he starts to jerk off. Fuck, but there’s definitely a part of him that wants to shove his cock into her, wants to fuck her for as little or as long as it will take for him to come, but he can only imagine how sensitive and worn-out she must be right now. Instead, he follows in Roy’s footsteps, stroking rapidly over his cock until he’s spilling thick ropes of cum all over the outer lips of her cunt.

He lets out a low sigh of relief as pleasure sings through his veins, and Wally sags as his energy seems to fade away along with the sexual tension that’s been keeping him going. He slumps against Jay after a moment, shifting to curl around her, and he hears, distantly, the way that Roy hums, sounding almost fond. He slits his eyes open at the sound of shuffling, and catches a glimpse of Roy settling next to them, arrows in his lap once more and his bow within easy reach. His gaze meets Wally’s for just a moment and his smile softens the intense look in his eyes before he turns back to his work.

It’s not lost on Wally that Roy has placed himself between them and the direction of the house, taking watch while they both have their guard down so thoroughly.

* * *

_“Daddy.”_

_Wally blinks, looking around wildly to locate the source of the voice, but everything is dark._

_“Daddy,” it says again, and Wally feels himself go cold as recognition filters in._

_“Jai?!” He calls out, still spinning around aimless in the dark, “Sweetheart, where are you?”_

_He stumbles forward, his arms outstretched in front of him as he calls for his son once more._

_“I’m over here, Dad,” a voice responds, but that’s not, no, it’s not right. It’s too old, too_ adult _, and Wally bites down on the whimper that builds in his throat at the knowledge that something is wrong._

 __“Jai,” _he calls again, and then something brushes against the palm of his hand and Wally jumps before pressing forward. His hands find shoulders that are far too high and then shift up to cradle a stubbled jaw._

_“No,” he breathes, his head shaking in denial. This can’t be right. It can’t be. They’d-_

_They’d fixed this. He, and Jai, and Irey, they’d gone into the Speedforce together, had_ fixed _this rapid aging problem, so this can’t be right._

_“Dad, I’m scared,” Jai whimpers from right in front of him, and Wally can’t deny it anymore. His arms wind around the boy - man’s - shoulders and he clutches him close._

_“It’s gonna be okay, baby,” he promises, “We’re gonna figure it out, we’ll fix it again, it’s okay.”_

_The body in his arms shudders, and Jai cries out in pain as he clings to his father. When he speaks again, his voice is little more than a croak, and Wally can feel the excess of wrinkles when he moves to cup his son’s cheeks._

_“Dad…” Jai rasps, “Help...”_

_Tears burn at Wally’s eyes as he shakes his head, as if he can just deny that this is happening. Because there’s nothing he can do, and he knows it._

_But he still doesn’t understand; this wasn’t supposed to be a problem anymore._

_“Shh,” he murmurs as he tucks Jai’s face against his neck, “Shh, I’m here. I love you, Jai, I’m right here.”_

_How could they all have been so blind? So_ certain _that everything was better now? How could they let their vigilance ease? His son-_

 _His_ kids _._

 _“Jai,” he asks sharply, panic rushing through him,_ “Where is your sister?” __

_“She’s right there, Dad,” Jai croaks, sounding just a bit confused, and Wally feels the way one hand lets go of him in order to gesture towards the ground._

_He freezes, his eyes squeezing shut even though the darkness itself hides what Wally already knows he does not want to see._

_“Dad?” Jai asks, shaking again as his breathing grows laboured, and Wally’s entire body shudders under the strength of his own sobs as he feels his son go limp in his arms._

_“No,” he cries, pulling back so that he can shake Jai’s shoulders, but there’s no response, “Nonononononononono.”_

_He steps back as another sob breaks through, dropping down to his knees as he drags Jai down with him and cradles his body to his chest. The lights in the room flicker before coming on, except it’s really only the one light - more of a spotlight, really, illuminating Wally himself and the elderly body of his son in his arms._

_He tears his gaze away from his son’s face eventually and tries to look around, his eyes straining against the dark until he can make out a dark shape a few feet away. A whimper tears from his throat as he remembers Jai’s words, and he stretches forward to reach out, sobbing loudly as his hand closes around a stiff, curled hand and he pulls and pulls until the body of an older woman slides into view._

_He isn’t sure_ how _he knows, just that he does, that the body belongs to his little girl._

_The room is silent save for the echoes of his own screams and sobs for a long time before Wally hears the soft click of heels and his gaze snaps up, eyes straining as another spotlight turns on in front of him. In its beam stands Linda, her expression as angry as Wally has ever seen it._

_“This is your fault,” she shouts at him, her hands shaking with rage as tears well in her eyes, “My babies! You killed my babies!”_

_She shouts, more agony than anger, as she drops to her knees and crawls towards him, her hands clawing at him when she swipes at his face._

_“Linda!” Wally cries out as he jerks away from her, letting go of their kids in the process, and Linda gives up on her assault in favour of curling over their daughter’s body._

_“This is your fault,” she moans, eyes filled with pure, unadulterated hatred as she looks up at him again, “I wish I’d never met you, Wally West!”_

_“Linda,” he says again, her name breaking between his lips as tears stream down his cheeks, “Don’t say that.”_

_“I hate you,” she sobs, and Wally feels it like a slap to the face, “I hate you! You destroyed everything!”_

* * *

Wally wakes with a shout, his body shivering from the coolness of the tacky sweat that covers his body. His heart races in his chest, and he reaches up to touch his face, finding it wet with more than just sweat.

A dream.

It was just a dream.

Wally lets that thought ease him for a few moments before reality truly crashes down upon him.

It doesn’t matter if it was only a dream, because it doesn’t change the fact that _his kids are still gone_. They’re gone, erased from the timeline entirely, and they’re not going to be coming back. A sob tears out of him at the thought, and Wally sits up as he curls around himself.

His children might as well be dead, because he’s never going to see them again, not really. He can spend as much time as he wants in the Chamber, but it’s never going to be _real_. He lost them, even more firmly than he’s lost Linda. At least they still have a _chance_ , but-

 _This is your fault,_ Linda’s voice echoes in his mind, _I wish I’d never met you, Wally West._

What if this dream was a warning? What if this is the universe’s way of telling him to stay away from Linda, that trying again can only lead to more pain and suffering for the both of them?

Wally bites his tongue hard enough to draw blood in order to keep from screaming, his heart rate picking up again until it feels like his heart is going to beat right out of his chest.

He needs to, to-

Something.

 _Move_.

He means to go for a run, but his body must have other plans, because no sooner has he bolted from his room before he’s throwing himself into the room two doors down and letting the door slam shut behind himself. Roy bolts upright in his bed, instinctively reaching for the knife tucked under his mattress, alarm clear on his face.

 _“Wally?”_ He asks sharply, freezing in place with the hilt of the knife in his hand. He shudders and forces himself to relax as he slides the knife back into place and lets go, “Jesus motherfucking _Christ_ , you scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry,” Wally squeaks out, though he’s not sure how intelligible it is, given the way he can still feel himself shaking all over. Vibrating, really, enough to blur his form as Roy squints at him in the dark, “Sorry,I’msorry,shouldIgo?Ishouldgo.Ididn’tmeanto-”

“Wally,” Roy snaps, and then he sighs and reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose, “Slow down. Get over here.”

Roy’s breath leaves him in a huff when Wally collides with him, but his hands come up to cup Wally’s cheeks nonetheless, a firm pressure that forces Wally to begin to slow down.

“Jesus Christ, Walls,” he mutters as he presses their foreheads together, “C’mon, Kid. Breath for me, shit.”

Wally sucks in several sharp, gasping breaths, and then, abruptly, he sags against Roy, going limp.

“Sorry,” he murmurs, and Roy sighs again as he lets go of his face in favour of wrapping his arms around him.

“Gonna tell me what the Hell’s got you all freaked out?”

Wally whimpers at that, and Roy clutches him tighter.

“S’stupid,” he mutters, and then, “Had a nightmare.” He laughs weakly at that, shaking his head even as he nuzzles into Roy’s chest and inhales deeply, letting his senses flood with the other man’s scent.

“Just,” he says after a few more seconds, “Just needed, um. I.”

“I got you,” Roy murmurs, shifting to hold Wally more comfortably, “It’s okay, man, I’m here.”

Wally trembles, his fingers clutching at the material of Roy’s sleep-shirt, and lets out a shaky breath.

“Roy,” he says, and, fuck, he sounds so desperate it makes his _own_ heart ache.

“Hey, I got you,” Roy says again, concern colouring his tone, and Wally shudders.

A thought occurs to him, then, and after a few more trembling breaths he asks, “Jay?”

He feels Roy shrug.

“In her own room,” he explains, and Wally nods to himself. He hadn’t really thought about it, he supposes, but, somewhere along the way, he must have assumed that Roy and Jay were sharing a room, even despite Roy’s insistence at their lack of couplehood. Apparently, though, that wasn’t the case.

It doesn’t really matter, anyway, though the thought that they’re likely to remain uninterrupted settles something inside him.

“I need,” he starts but then hesitates, unsure of what exactly he intends to ask for, “I- _Roy_.”

“What do you need, sweetheart?” Roy asks, and Wally _keens_ , prompting Roy to hold him tighter still as he hums. “Use your words, baby,” he says, and Wally’s fingers curl even tighter into his shirt.

“You,” he grits out, fighting half-heartedly against Roy when he urges Wally to lift his head, “I need. You. Please. Roy, pleasepleasefuckIjustneedyou.”

His eyes are wet when he finally concedes and looks up at the other man, and Roy’s expression looks soft in the dim moonlight filtering into the room. It makes his heart beat a little faster in his chest, and Wally swallows hard at the intensity that slowly spreads across Roy’s face.

“Please,” he breathes, and then Roy is kissing him, his tongue pressing in without waiting for an invitation, and Wally surrenders easily, allowing Roy to take control. He goes easily when Roy lifts slightly and then turns to lay him down on the bed, crawling over him as Wally’s legs lift to bracket Roy’s hips.

“Alright, sweetheart,” Roy murmurs as he pulls back just long enough to move his mouth to Wally’s throat, his lips brushing over it as he continues, “I’ve got you. Let me take care of everything.” His tongue lavs over Wally’s Adam’s apple before Roy nips at it and then trails his mouth towards the side of his neck and bites him properly, sucking at the skin between his teeth even though they both know he’ll never be able to leave the bruises he wants to, not with how quickly Wally heals.

“Roy,” he says again, whiney and desperate and pleading, “Roy, _please_.”

“Shh,” Roy chastises, brushing a light kiss over Wally’s lips to quiet him, “Do you trust me?”

Wally nods immediately, his throat bobbing as he swallows, and Roy’s smile looks positively _sinful_.

“Good boy,” he purrs, and Wally feels his entire body shudder in response. He jumps slightly when Roy’s hands slide up his sides, pushing his shirt up with them as he goes, and Wally raises himself up just enough to let Roy pull it off completely before he lays back down.

“That’s it,” Roy hums, his lips leaving a hot trail of open-mouthed kisses down his sternum towards his belly as he shifts further down the bed. Wally lets his legs splay open around him, his cock stirring in his sweatpants as Roy’s mouth gets closer and closer to the waistband. His hands come down to meet it, two fingers tucking in underneath on either side, but Roy doesn’t start to pull them down yet, opting instead to suck at Wally’s cock through the thin material until they’re wet and Wally is grinding up against him.

He pulls back with a huff when Wally reaches out to get a hand in his hair, and Wally whines at the loss.

“Hold onto the headboard for me, sweetheart,” he says, and his words are soft, but there’s something hard behind them, too, a promise of punishment should Wally fail to obey, “You’re not going to let go until I tell you to, isn’t that right?”

Wally swallows hard, his eyes wide and wet as he looks down at Roy and gives a small nod as he moves to do as he was told.

“Good,” Roy praises, and then he looks down again as he tugs Wally’s sweats down, freeing his hard cock and baring him to the cool air of the bedroom. He pulls them off completely and tosses them aside to join his shirt, and then he reaches for Wally’s knees, pushing them up; Wally bends them obediently and shivers with anticipation when Roy pushes them back further until they’re tucked up against his chest.

“Keep them just like that,” he says before letting go, and Wally obeys easily, keeping himself curled up with his ass on display. Heat flares across his cheeks when Roy takes a few moments to just _look_ at him, and a low whimper escapes him when Roy reaches out to drag the dry pad of his thumb over his perineum and then dips it shallowly into his hole.

“How long has it been?” Roy asks, and Wally trembles, “You’re going to be so tight, hmm? Such a good little slut, aren’t you? Bet you’ve been keeping yourself in shape for me, haven’t you?”

He presses down slightly, just for a moment, before he withdraws his thumb and lays himself out on the bed. Even knowing that it’s coming, Wally still jumps and lets out a cry when he feels the wet drag of Roy’s tongue as he licks along his crack before the tip of it starts to circle the tight rim of his hole.

“Mmmmfuck,” he whines, and Roy chuckles against him, the rough scruff on his chin scratching against sensitive skin as he teases his tongue in deeper before he withdraws it to circle around the rim again. Wally clenches his hands around the metal bars of the headboard so that he won’t let go and reach for Roy, and he flexes slightly to draw his knees in even tighter towards his chest.

He rocks down against Roy’s face when his tongue breaches him again, and Roy reaches out to grab at the meat of his thighs, squeezing sharply in warning before he slides his hands lower so that he can use his grip to spread Wally’s cheeks apart. Wally groans, his eyes squeezing shut as Roy’s tongue pushes in and out of him, the hot, wet slide of it shooting little fissures of pleasure up his spine as a slick sound fills the room, sounding so much louder when the only thing it has to contend with is Wally’s own harsh breathing.

His cock is aching, his balls heavy and drawing up tight against him when Roy suddenly stops, and Wally gives a sharp whine of protest that has the other man chuckling as he sits up and wipes the back of his hand over his mouth.

“Not yet, slut,” he teases, and Wally whines as he forces his eyes open so that he can look up at him, though the image before him blurs a little as tears well up in his eyes. Roy scoffs, shaking his head as he adds, “Really? Are you going to cry over not being allowed to come? Pathetic.”

Wally bites at his lip to hold back a whimper, his tears spilling over and dripping down his temples. He might have been surprised by how quickly and easily Roy was able to get him to this state, but, truthfully, Wally’s pretty sure he’s been heading towards this for a while now. With Roy’s focus entirely on _him_ , this time, it’s no real wonder that he’s slipping so easily into the role he’d gotten so used to in his youth.

There are some things you just don’t forget.

He blinks, feeling dazed when there are suddenly cool, slicked-up fingers pressing into him, and looks up at Roy in surprise. The focused look on his face as he watches himself work has heat burning in Wally’s gut, and he clenches around Roy’s fingers, hoping to tempt him into giving him more. Into giving him _everything_.

But Roy just carries on with the same maddeningly slow pace, stretching him open on two fingers for what feels like an eternity before he adds a third and then, after another brief eternity, a fourth.

Wally barely registers the way he’s pleading for more, his fingers gone white and his hands shaking from how tightly he’s gripping the headboard.

His cock is sticky with precum that’s dripping down in a near-steady stream by the time Roy withdraws his fingers and reaches for the lube once more. He slicks himself up without wasting any time and then reaches for Wally’s thighs with sticky fingers, spreading them open wider as he slots himself in between them and then lets go in favour of supporting himself against the mattress and allowing Wally to hook his ankles over Roy’s shoulders as he lines himself up and then pushes into him with one long, slow thrust.

Their moans blend together, filling the air of the small bedroom as Roy bottoms out and then immediately begins to pull back out.

 _“Christ,”_ he grits out as Wally clenches tight around him as if he’s trying to keep him in, “Fuck, sweetheart, you’re even tighter than I remembered.”

Wally’s gut seems to flip in response to the praise, and he whines as he rolls his hips up.

“Feels so good,” he says breathlessly, lashes fluttering as Roy pushes into him again and forces another moan from between his lips, “Oh, _oh_ , fuck, _Roy_.”

“That’s it,” Roy encourages, his pace gradually increasing as Wally’s body adjusts to the girth of his cock splitting him open, “Sing for me, sweetheart. Tell me how it feels.”

Wally’s mouth falls open on another moan, the sound lengthening and rising in pitch until each of Roy’s thrusts is pushing sharp, staccato little cries from him.

“Please,” he cries out, his cock still dripping messily as every drag of Roy’s inside him seems to press up against his prostate just right, “Please, Sir, fuck, pleasepleasepleaseIneeditpleasesogoodfuckcanIcomepleaseletmecome.”

Roy huffs out a _‘shut up’_ and lifts a hand off of the mattress, and Wally whimpers, his eyes wet and wide and desperate as Roy’s palm covers his mouth and presses down. There are tears streaking down his face as Roy speeds up, fucking into him hard and fast so that his entire body is jostled by the force of every thrust. Their eyes meet for a few seconds and Wally bites down on his tongue in an effort to stave off his approaching orgasm, but the burst of pain does little to distract him.

He clenches around Roy’s dick as tightly as he can, trying to draw him towards his own release in the hopes that Roy will let him come, too, and Roy grunts, swearing under his breath as his fingers press tighter against Wally’s cheek.

“Fuck, yeah,” he murmurs almost-feverishly, “That’s it, slut, fuck, just like that. Hnng, so tight, babe, such a good little fuckhole for me, _shit_. Gonna make me come, sweetheart, fucking hell.”

Wally whines sharply, although it comes out muffled by Roy’s hand, and his hands twitch; Roy’s gaze cuts to them immediately, and Wally forces himself to grip at the metal bars even more tightly to show his dedication.

“Yeah?” Roy huffs, his own eyes closing for a moment as he groans again, “You want that? Want me to fill you up, slut? Get you off by stuffing you full of cum?”

Wally feels the way his entire body seems to jerk at that, and Roy gives a breathless laugh as he finally drags his hand away from Wally’s mouth, sliding it down to his throat, instead, and squeezing at his neck as he speeds up, chasing his own release now.

“Fucking slut,” he grits out, “Filthy little bitch, forgot how much you love this shi--- _fuck!_ ” Wally’s jaw drops on a strangled cry as Roy hammers into him, working himself through his orgasm as his dick jerks and spills inside of him, and his own cock follows suit, lights bursting behind his eyes as he squeezes them shut and comes so hard Wally thinks he’d be breathless even if Roy wasn’t choking him like his life depends on it.

Roy’s thrusts slow gradually until he comes to a stop, and Wally trembles as he keeps himself in position and blinks his eyes open to meet Roy’s. There’s still so much heat reflecting back at him from that dark gaze, but there’s something soft, too, and Wally can’t stop the low whine that escapes him right before Roy leans in to capture his mouth in another kiss. He shifts above him, carefully reaching up to help guide Wally into lowering his legs, and then he pulls back from the kiss, too, and Wally gives another quiet whine of unhappiness.

Warm hands rub up the length of his arms until deft fingers are helping him to unlock his own from their death-grip against the headboard, and Wally gives a whimper of pain that makes Roy’s brow crease with concern. He massages the backs of Wally’s hands as he pulls them away from the bars, moving lower to do the same with his wrists before he lifts each of them in turn to his mouth and kisses over Wally’s rapidly-beating pulse.

“Good boy,” he murmurs, and Wally whines again as a shiver runs through him, “You did so good, sweetheart, I’m so proud of you.”

Wally’s tears return and he shakes his head weakly, and Roy nips at his wrist in warning before lowering it again in favour of carefully massaging one of Wally’s arms and then the next.

“Yes,” he says, “Yes, Wally, you’re so good, my sweet boy.”

Wally’s breath catches as his tears fall faster, and he reaches his free hand up to fist at his mouth in order to stifle the sob that escapes. Roy just sighs softly and shakes his head, finishing with the other arm before he moves to pull back, and Wally sobs again at the loss when Roy’s now-soft cock slips out of him.

“Shh,” he murmurs, but he’s still pulling away, and Wally sobs harder. He hears Roy swear from somewhere nearby, hears a bit of rustling and the sound of a drawer opening and closing, and then Roy is back, a wet-wipe in his hand as he gently cleans Wally’s cock and then drags it lower to clean between his asscheeks.

“It’s okay,” Roy says softly as he works, “I’m right here, sweetheart, shh, let me take care of you.” When he’s finished and has tossed the wipe towards the trash, Roy seems to hesitate for a moment, and Wally slowly opens his eyes to look up at him, taking in the creased brow and clouded look in Roy’s eyes for a moment. If Wally didn’t know any better, he’d almost guess that Roy looks… lost. Or surprised, perhaps, but with what Wally isn’t sure.

Either way, Roy seems to rally a moment later, shaking himself out of it as he lays himself out over Wally and kisses him again, reaching down to coax Wally into hiking one leg up against his hip before he rolls over onto his side, bringing Wally with him. Wally, for his part, falls into the kiss eagerly, kissing Roy like his life depends on it as he moves with him and then presses closer. Roy’s kiss gentles and slows after a moment, and then he breaks it in favour of pressing several shorter kisses to Wally’s lips before those, too, cease. He shifts again, tucking Wally’s face in against his neck, and then he reaches for the blankets that have been pushed to the end of the bed, tugging the thinner sheet up to cover them both.

“I’ve got you, Wally,” he murmurs softly, making him shudder, “Go back to sleep, sweetheart, I’ll be right here, hm?”

Wally shakes and presses closer, his eyes drifting closed as Roy’s hand slides into his hair and starts massaging his scalp.

“Love you,” Wally hears himself whisper, and Roy huffs out a sound that could almost be called disbelieving before pressing his lips to the crown of Wally’s head.

“Love you, too, sweetheart,” he murmurs, and Wally gives a low sigh of relief before letting himself relax fully and drift towards sleep.

* * *

Wally wakes slowly, his body feeling warm and heavy as he starts to stir, and he blinks his eyes open when he hears a huff of displeasure before the arm he’s just now noticing is slung around his waist tightens. Roy’s face is slack with sleep when Wally focuses on him, his lips parted slightly as his chest rises and falls with slow breaths, and Wally finds himself captivated for several long moments, just staring at him.

“Stop starin’,” Roy murmurs, and Wally feels his cheeks warm with a blush as he ducks his head against Roy’s chest, feeling the rumble that runs through it as Roy’s hand slides to the small of his back.

“Morning,” Wally finally says, and Roy huffs again before letting his hand slide lower, making Wally yelp when Roy gropes his ass. Roy chuckles, squeezing again before he lets go and lets his arm fall away so that Wally can sit up. The blanket pools low over his hips as he does, and he can’t help licking his lips when he looks over at Roy and sees the slight tent in the blankets covering him from the waist down.

“Looks like part of you’s awake, at least,” he teases, and Roy cracks his eyes open to glare at him even as Wally shifts, slipping down underneath the blankets and moving between Roy’s legs.

 _“Fuck,”_ he hears Roy groan as he drags his tongue up the underside of Roy’s dick before sucking at the head for a few seconds. He shivers when Roy’s hand slips down to meet him, tangling into his hair and pushing down insistently until Wally opens his mouth wider and sinks down over Roy’s cock, his throat relaxing as he takes him right into it without hesitation.

Roy grunts, his hips bucking up to press himself in even deeper, and Wally moans around the intrusion. He’d be more than happy to stay just like this for as long as Roy wants him to, but Roy has other plans, tugging sharply at Wally’s hair until Wally obeys and starts to bob back up, falling into a quick rhythm that’s guided largely by Roy’s grip. Drool rolls down his cock as he bucks up to meet Wally’s throat when he pushes his head down again, and Wally grinds down against the mattress beneath him as his hands tremble against Roy’s hips.

He comes first, embarrassment making his stomach squirm and his cheeks flush as he makes a mess against the bedsheets, and his moan gets choked off when Roy starts pushing up even faster into his mouth, stealing the air from his lungs again and again until he finally pulls back in order to come all over Wally’s tongue, letting him taste it the way he knows Wally loves.

Wally moans again, swallowing what he’s given before lapping at Roy’s cock, cleaning it up before he finally pulls back and crawls out from under the blankets. Roy drags him into a kiss as soon as he’s close enough, and Wally groans as he ruts against Roy’s leg, his cock still half-hard despite his own orgasm. He makes a noise of surprise when Roy rolls them over and kisses him more deeply as his hand moves down to grip Wally’s dick, jerking it exactly the way Wally likes until he’s shaking beneath him and coming into Roy’s hand with a whine that Roy swallows down.

A cough from the doorframe startles them both, and Roy turns to look over his shoulder as Wally pushes himself to sit up. His racing heart starts to slow again when he sees Jay leaning back against the closed door, a breath of relief leaving him as he lets himself drop back down against the bed.

“Am I interrupting something?” She asks, amusement curling her tone, and Wally gives an embarrassed whine as Roy chuckles.

“Nah,” he says and then wipes his hand off on Wally’s stomach before climbing off of him and getting off of the bed, too, “We were just finishing.”

Jay hums, pushing off of the door and walking over to meet Roy, who tips her head back with a sharp tug to her hair and brushes a kiss over her lips.

“I need a shower,” he grumbles as he pulls back, and Wally watches as he gathers his clothing before slipping into a robe and sliding his mask over his face.

Of all things, it still makes Wally laugh that Sanctuary has _communal bathrooms_ , but he supposes it would be too hard to install one next to every bedroom.

“Don’t have too much fun without me,” he teases, and Wally huffs even as Jay rolls her eyes and strips out of her own robe, though she doesn’t bother removing the domino, knowing they’ll likely be heading out into the communal areas sooner rather than later.

Roy slips out into the hall, the door clicking shut behind him, and Jay crawls onto the bed, laying out on her side next to Wally and looking up at him. She’s quiet for a moment, and Wally meets her gaze for only a few seconds before his own darts away again.

“Okay?” She asks eventually, and Wally forces his breathing to remain even.

“Sure,” he says, unconvincing even to his own ears, and Jay makes a noise of disbelief, but she doesn’t call him out on it. She does, however, press closer, slotting herself against his side and resting her cheek on his shoulder, and Wally sighs softly as he relaxes into her body heat and wraps an arm around her, his eyes fluttering shut again as he dozes off until Roy returns.

* * *

Wally avoids the Chamber that day, afraid to see what his mind might toss at him after last night’s nightmare. He still feels unsettled, though, and finds himself trailing after Jay and Roy more than anything else, just sort of going with the flow and letting them lead. He can sense Jay’s concern, catching her exchanging looks with Roy a few times, but she doesn’t ask if he’s okay again.

He wonders, for a moment, if her asking earlier was just a courtesy, but that doesn’t feel right, not really. He knows that she cares, for some reason he doesn’t quite understand. Aside from this past week or so, they never really had much of a relationship. Sure, he’s her brother’s best friend, but, well.

Jay and Dick never did have the best relationship before she died, and there’s been little reason to get to know one another since she returned.

Since _he_ returned.

Yet, for some reason, Jay seems to care about him beyond just the fact that they’re having sex, and it would be baffling to him except for the way that he finds himself feeling similarly. The more time they spend together, the more he finds that he actually _likes_ Jay. Likes her company, her wit and her sense of humour, and the way she cares with every piece of her heart in stark contrast to what Bruce would have everyone believe.

Maybe it’s that, that sense that she’s a kindred spirit of some sort, someone else who has been so deeply misunderstood, that draws them together. Because Wally feels that, too, if he’s being honest. It’s different, he supposes, because everyone thinks he’s someone _better_ than he really is, when it’s the opposite for Jay, but it’s like they’re two sides of the same coin, maybe, or reflections in a mirror.

She slips away after lunch for her own session in the Chamber, and Wally finds himself actively missing her presence as he and Roy watch some movie he’s not even remotely paying attention to in Roy’s room until she returns. Her own smile seems more brittle than it had that morning, but Wally doesn’t ask, and neither does Roy.

Whatever is bothering her, she manages to shake it off as afternoon fades into evening, and Wally allows the guilt building in his gut over not asking to clear out.

* * *

Wally finds himself lingering as the night draws to a close, not wanting to head back to his room and be left alone, and Roy keeps shooting him these considering looks, eyes raking over Wally’s form as if he’s undressing him with his eyes until Wally feels like his whole body is thrumming with pent-up energy and anticipation.

“Wally,” he says finally, his tone steady and firm and _commanding_ , and Wally’s attention snaps over to him as his heart starts to beat a little faster, “Come here.”

Wally obeys in, well, a flash, zipping over to sit at Roy’s side where he’d indicated, and Roy hums, his lips curling into a lazy smirk.

“Arms out,” he says, and Wally swallows hard as he does just that, his arms spreading wide as he stretches them out, “Good boy.”

Wally shudders, staying put even as Roy pulls away and digs through his side-table before he returns with two pairs of metal handcuffs dangling from his fingers. His eyes widen, breath picking up as he watches Roy cuff first one hand, and then the other, to the metal bars of the headboard. Roy’s hand grabs his chin when he’s done, lifting his face until Wally looks at him through heavily-hooded eyes, and Roy seems to consider him for a moment before deciding that he likes what he sees.

“Now, stay just like that for me, sweetheart,” he purrs, and Wally manages a small nod before Roy lets go and pulls away. “Jay,” he calls, fingers snapping at his side before Jay sidles up to him, curiosity and arousal both clear in her gaze as she looks from Roy to Wally and then back again, “Takes his clothes off.”

She shivers, nodding as she moves to do just that, and Wally helps where he can, lifting himself up as she drags his pants and boxers down and off. She hesitates when, after removing his socks, she gets to his shirt, and she glances back over her shoulder at Roy, who simply raises an eyebrow expectantly. Her gaze lowers as she turns back to Wally and reaches for the kris holstered on her thigh.

He inhales sharply when she slices into the collar of his shirt, starting the rip that she goes on to tear the rest of the way with her hands. She cuts at the shoulders, too, when she’s done, until the rest of the material falls away from his skin, and Wally shivers in the cool air of Roy’s bedroom as they look him over.

Roy slides closer, taking the dagger from Jay and setting it aside, and he chuckles when he returns to run a hand down Wally’s chest, all the way down to his groin. He squeezes none too gently at Wally’s semi-erect dick, and Wally whimpers as he looks up at him with wet eyes.

“Sir,” he breathes, and Roy huffs out a laugh before letting go of his cock in favour of raising his hand so that he can slap him across the face. It’s not a particularly _hard_ slap, but it makes Wally jolt nonetheless, his cock throbbing between his legs as he gets harder.

“I don’t want to hear a word out of you,” he warns, and Wally whimpers again as his eyes go wide. He forces himself to nod, though, and shivers at the approving smile Roy gives him before he turns to Jay and drags her in for a kiss, licking into her mouth with a passion that makes Wally ache with desire before he pushes her away from him.

“Strip,” he orders, and Jay scrambles to obey, climbing off of the bed for as long as it takes to peel off the tank top and bra she’s wearing and then drop her skirt and panties. She tears off the thigh holster and then kneels at the edge of the bed, hesitating, until Roy himself shifts further down the bed and points to the space between himself and Wally.

“On your hands and knees,” he says, “Let me see that eager cunt.”

She obeys just as easily as before, crawling over to plant herself between the two of them, and Roy’s left just enough space that she’s nearly in Wally’s lap; he can feel her breath as it ghosts across his thighs, and it makes him shiver, his hips rolling up as if to push his cock closer to that warm, wet mouth.

Roy _tsks_ , and Wally flushes with embarrassment as he forces his hips to still. He looks at Roy again when Jay whimpers, his mouth going dry at the sight of Roy teasing his fingers up and down Jay’s slit before two of them push into her. His gaze shifts to her face, watches as her lashes flutter and her mouth drops open around panting breaths as Roy drags those fingers in and out of her slowly.

“You get wet so fast,” Roy scoffs, and Jay whimpers as a low whine of arousal escapes Wally’s throat, “God, you really are just a slut, aren’t you? So ready to take a cock at the drop of a hat.” Jay trembles, her grip on the blankets on either side of Wally’s knees tightening, and Wally fights to keep himself still.

He adds a third finger, then, still pumping them so slowly inside her, and Jay squirms, pushing back against him eagerly until Roy slaps her ass in warning.

“Greedy bitch,” he grunts, and Jay whimpers as tears well up in her eyes. She jolts, giving a sharp cry when Roy suddenly speeds up, his fingers driving into her hard and fast, “Is this what you wanted? Hm? That good enough for you, slut?”

She opens her mouth to say- something, God knows what, but all that comes out is a wet moan as she shakes her head and pushes her hips back again. Roy chuckles, and the dark tint to it has shivers running down Wally’s spine as he lifts his gaze again to watch him. There’s a near-sadistic glee in the other man’s gaze as he watches his fingers fucking harshly into Jay’s cunt, and she cries out, her head dropping to hang with shame, when he moves even faster, keeps going until she’s giving a high moan and the sound of his fingers thrusting into her grows louder and wetter.

She just came, Wally realizes, and his own cock jerks with his arousal and his envy.

Roy’s fingers are shiny with slick when he withdraws them and wipes them off on Jay’s ass before he shoves his own pants and underwear down to his hips, freeing his cock. Wally licks his lips at the sight of it, flushed and hard and leaking just a little, but he doesn’t have long to look before Roy starts dragging it between her labia, getting it wet enough to line himself up and thrust into her.

She cries out again, jolting along the bed, and Wally groans when she nudges closer to him, his cock close enough to feel the warm puffs of breath against its head when she gasps. It’s like a special form of torture, and Wally whimpers when Roy catches his gaze with a knowing smirk. He leaves them just like that for a few moments longer as he settles into a quick pace and then finally reaches out to grab Jay by the hair, pulling her back slightly so that she’s looking up at Wally as Roy fucks her.

Her breath quickens as she meets Wally’s heated gaze, mouth dropping open on another moan as her fingers twitch like she wants to reach out for him but knows that she shouldn’t. She pushes back against Roy, instead, and he groans as he pulls her hair harder, making her give a sharp cry as tears spill down her cheeks.

“Roy,” she chokes out, and Roy’s other hand settles at her hip, his nails biting into her skin as he pulls her back harder on his cock.

“Fuck, I love you like this,” Roy grunts as his grip on Jay’s hip tightens, and she gives a wrecked moan as she pushes back against him, her expression shuttering for a moment so brief that Wally himself almost misses it, “Such a needy little slut for me, shit.”

Wally can’t quite help the frown that turns his lips down when he hears that. It takes him a moment to discern _why_ , though, because he's never cared before. Hell, last night was a stark reminder of the way that he's always _liked_ it when Roy speaks like that to him, and Jay seems to like it, too.

“That’s it, bitch,” Roy goes on, “You were made for this, weren’t you?”

But Roy had been sweet with him, too, just like always, and for as much as Wally wracks his brain, he can’t find any evidence of Roy treating Jay the same way whilst being intimate, can only come up with the looks of devastation and heartbreak that Jay often has for Roy.

 _‘I love you_ like this _,’_ Roy had said, but all Wally can really hear is _‘I love how you let me fuck you however I want.’_

And maybe he’s being unfair, because Roy likely doesn’t mean it like that - not _consciously_ , at least, Wally’s thoughts interrupt - but it still sits uncomfortably in Wally’s stomach. For all he knows, _Jay_ likes it like that, but that doesn’t feel right, either, not when he’s seen her respond to even the barest amounts of praise that he himself has given her.

 _I love you_ is probably everything Jay’s been wanting to hear from Roy for God only knows how long now, and the qualifier must hurt like a punch to the gut.

He shifts uncomfortably, wrists tugging uselessly against the handcuffs, and Roy looks up at him and smirks.

“I think Wally’s getting impatient,” he stage-whispers, and then his palm lands hard across Jay’s ass, making her yelp, “Better hurry it up, slut. Make me come so you can hop on your next dick.”

Jay makes a noise not unlike a sob and rocks herself back against Roy faster, and Wally can only assume by the groan that he lets out in response that she’s clenching up around him, making herself tighter for him. He spanks her again several times until she’s coming with a loud cry, and Wally feels his own cock twitch at the thought of how she’s got to be contracting around Roy, drawing him along with her to the edge as he grunts and slams into her roughly a few more times before he goes still.

He lets go of her hair, finally, dragging his hand down her spine until he can grab her by both of her hips, and her head tips forward without his support. She squirms when he starts moving again, tears streaking down her cheeks from hazy, unfocused eyes when she glances up at Wally, and Roy thrusts into her slowly a few more times. She whines sharply, and Roy laughs.

“Yeah?” He teases, “You like that, slut? Like when I fuck my own cum deeper into you?” She whines again, a shudder running down her spine, and Wally can’t help the groan that passes through his own lips, “Bet you can come again just like this, can’t you? Gonna come all over my soft dick like that’s all you need? Just _something_ inside your greedy cunt?”

He laughs again, and Jay whimpers when he slaps her ass once more.

“Do it, and I’ll let you sit on Wally’s cock, slut.”

Jay looks up at him properly, then, her cheeks flushed and her gaze just a little off-centre, and it’s like he’s watching in slow motion as her mouth drops open on a moan, her muscles locking up and almost convulsing as she shakes her way through another orgasm.

He barely registers the breathless quality to Roy’s voice when he swears, wincing slightly as she clamps around his oversensitive cock.

Jay’s arms give out on her, sending her crashing down into Wally’s lap, and she makes a soft noise of complaint when Roy pulls out and then shoves two fingers into her right away. Wally whimpers as her breath shivers out against his cock, his hips jerking before he can stop them, and she makes another little noise as she shifts. Her tongue darts out, licking tentatively at the base of his dick, and Wally swears as he tosses his head back and curls his fingers into fists, forcing himself to stay put.

“Fuck, you’re soaked,” Roy groans at the same time, and Jay lifts her hips just slightly to try and push back on his fingers even as her tongue swipes at Wally’s cock again, “Yeah? You still want more?”

Roy smirks as he slides his fingers free, and he looks over at Wally again with a long-familiar heat in his eyes. It makes Wally shudder, his mouth suddenly dry as he tries to swallow the tension rising in him.

“Get up, then,” he mutters, scoffing when he finally looks down at Jay again and notices what she’s up to, “Christ, look at you, can’t put you near a dick for ten seconds without you turning into a needy little whore.” He sighs and slaps her upper thigh, making her jolt, her tongue sliding hot and slick against Wally’s cock when she jerks her head forward.

“Get. _Up._ ” Roy says again, “You’re going to ride Wally’s pretty cock until I tell you to stop, bitch. How does that sound?”

Wally shudders again, his own eyes wide as he looks between Jay and Roy, as he watches her struggle to push herself up on shaking, unsteady arms.

“Yes, sir,” she whimpers, and Wally realises that it’s the first real words he’s heard from her in a while. It makes him wonder, for a moment, if her mind goes as soft and hazy as his own does when he’s getting fucked, but the thought disappears and his cock jerks again when she pushes up onto her knees and clumsily climbs into his lap. Their moans mingle together in the air as she sinks down onto him, and, fuck, Roy was right; she’s absolutely drenched. His hips lift involuntarily, grinding his cock up into her more deeply, and he moans again even as Roy’s chuckling paints his cheeks red.

“God, you’re _both_ pathetic,” he says, and Jay bites down on her lip as her eyes water, “You like how wet she is, Wally? You like having your cock up such a sloppy, used cunt?” He scoffs, and Wally whines in embarrassment.

“You deserve each other.”

Jay shakes against him as she gets her hands on Wally’s shoulders and pushes herself up, using him as a support as she rides him until they’re both moaning desperately. The handcuffs clang loudly against the metal rails of the headboard every time Wally tries to reach out to steady her, to guide her into going faster, and it’s only a sharp command from Roy that makes him stop before he simply phases right out of them.

Wally’s first orgasm crashes over him, leaving him breathless and boneless as he slumps against the headboard, and he swears when she just keeps going, clenching herself around him as she works him through it and then digging her nails into his shoulders as she forces herself to move faster, chasing her own pleasure as she keeps riding his still-hard cock.

He tips his head back, staring up at her and taking in every shift in her expression. He watches as she bites her lip, as the skin at the corners of her eyes tightens. Takes in the way her hair sticks to her sweat-slicked skin, framing her face, and the way tears clot in her eyelashes.

“Jay,” he murmurs, forgetting all about Roy’s instructions to stay quiet, and her eyes widen slightly as they seek out his own, her orgasm ripping through her and leaving her gasping as she gushes around his cock, those wet lashes fluttering and smearing her tears back onto the tops of her cheeks.

She goes still for barely a heartbeat before Roy’s voice is back, barking out that he didn’t tell her to _stop_ , and she gives a low moan as she forces herself to resume the rise and fall of her body. Exhaustion shakes through her limbs as she whimpers, and Wally cranes his neck so that he can drag his lips along her jaw.

“So good,” he tells her gently, and she shudders, “That’s it, sweetheart.”

She tips her own face down, then, her lips seeking his until they’re locked in a searing kiss. He can taste the salt of her tears, but that doesn’t stop him from slipping his tongue into her mouth. He swallows her cry when he starts vibrating inside her, his teeth dragging over her bottom lip when he finally pulls back and gives her a dazed smile.

“C’mon, Jay,” he encourages her, “Get yourself off again, babe.”

She whimpers, shaking through the exertion as she rides him faster, and Wally can’t help but groan at the way he can feel her fluids and Roy’s and his own cum dripping down his cock every time she lifts herself, sliding up to the head of his cock before dropping back down. It’s wet and filthy and so goddamn hot that he feels like he’s dying, and he tugs at his restraints again when Roy presses himself against Jay’s back and starts mouthing at her neck. He reaches around her, his hand cupping the front of her cunt as he dips two fingers down to start rubbing at her clit, and Jay _wails_ , the slick, heated walls of her cunt contracting almost rhythmically around Wally’s dick and making him whine.

“Look at you,” Roy coos, “God, you’re such a useless little slut, aren’t you? How many times was that, hm?” His fingers venture lower, teasing around Wally’s cock and then pressing into her alongside it, and Jay cries out as fresh tears well up in her eyes. “Keep going,” Roy tells her as he brings his other hand up to grope one of her tits, “Don’t be such a selfish bitch. Make him come again.”

Wally swears under his breath, Roy’s gaze pinning him in place as their eyes meet, and everything else seems to fade away for a moment; there’s only Roy, Roy and that steady, heated look in his eyes as he stares Wally down, as his fingers press against Wally’s cock and make Jay feel that much tighter as his own hips buck up to meet her every time she drops down on him again. She cries out when he starts vibrating faster, and the sharp prick of her nails against the back of his neck draws him back to full awareness as she breathes a litany of sharp gasps against his ear.

“C’mon, Wally,” Roy says, “Put another load in her, show her what she’s good for.”

Jay whimpers as she seats herself in his lap and starts rocking in against him almost desperately, and Wally swears again, his head tipping back and his eyes squeezing shut as he fucks up into her just as rapidly, bouncing her in his lap as he speeds up until he’s finally coming again, his cock jerking and twitching as he paints her insides white once more.

“Good boy,” Roy murmurs, pulling his fingers free and then shoving them into Jay’s mouth, stifling her shout as she, too, comes once again. She gives a feeble little whine around the intrusion when Roy asks her if that’s enough, if she’s finally done, and Wally’s head feels so damn heavy as he forces himself to lift it so he can look at the pair of them.

There’s a softness in Roy’s eyes that settles something deep inside him even as he takes in the tears, sweat and spit streaking all over Jay’s face and the utterly dazed look in her eyes. He slumps back against the headboard when Jay finally stills in his lap, his own eyes closing for a moment as he greedily sucks down air, feeling as if he’s just run the length of the state in mere seconds.

His lashes flutter, but he doesn’t open his eyes, when Jay gives another little whimper and then lifts herself off of his cock before collapsing against him. He hums as Roy releases his hands, letting them drop like weights down at his sides for several long moments before he forces himself to lift them, one arm wrapping around Jay’s shoulders and holding her against him as the other hand settles to rub comfortingly against her hip. Roy’s chuckle feels so distant, as does his own responding mewl, but he turns his face searchingly when he feels lips ghost over his cheek. He’s rewarded with a chaste kiss and another low chuckle, and he only gives a token protest before relinquishing his hold on Jay when Roy moves to take her from him.

“Lay down, Wally,” Roy murmurs, and he obeys instinctively, sliding down and squirming to get comfortable even though he feels so _cold_ , all of a sudden. The heat and weight of Jay settling back over him helps with that, though, and then Roy is pressed against his side, too, one arm slung over Jay’s waist where she’s laying on top of him, and Wally gives a contented sigh that Jay echoes as she nuzzles into his chest. He pets absently at her back when he lifts his own arm to hold her, too, and turns his head to face Roy, his eyes cracking open to look at him. He purses his lips, and Roy rolls his eyes playfully before pressing in to kiss him properly, his tongue working slowly to pry Wally’s lips open and lick into his mouth. Wally sighs as he settles into it and tucks his face against Roy when they finally part even though it pulls uncomfortably at his neck.

He loses track of time as they stay like that for a while, floating in the pleasant haze of good sex and two warm bodies caging him in. Roy starts to stir first, shushing them both when they give matching little whines.

“I’ll be right back,” he says, and Wally clutches Jay closer as Roy pulls away and gets out of bed.

True to his word, he returns less than a minute later, and Wally hums when Roy carefully coaxes Jay down onto the bed. She makes a questioning noise and Wally frowns, opening his eyes when she tenses against him. There’s a surprised look on her face, and Wally glances down to look at Roy, who’s dragging a wipe over her thighs. It doesn’t really make sense to him, at first, why she’s surprised, because this is the Roy he’s used to, but his confusion shifts into an aching sadness when he finally figures out that, maybe, that’s not the case for Jay.

After all, he thinks this might be the first time since they started this that he’s seen Roy give Jay more than a perfunctory kiss and half-assed murmur of praise after sex, even though he’s seen them being plenty soft together outside of it. He thinks about that lost look on Roy’s face the night before, like he’d surprised himself by acting on age-old instincts to care for Wally when they’d finished, and it sets the cogs in his mind to working.

He can’t help but wonder if it’s something about _him_ that’s bringing this side of Roy out again, and it makes his heart feel a little bit lighter. If just being here can remind Roy to be better, then maybe this whole arrangement isn’t so ill-advised after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the first part, and I will try my best not to keep you waiting too long for the ending.


	2. ii.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /slinks in with her tail between her legs and drops the update in your lap
> 
> I am… so, so sorry. Real life has been a bitch, and I got a smidge burnt out on this, and. Yeah. I’m so sorry that this is coming out significantly later than I said it would be. I really, really hope it’s worth the wait.
> 
> This chapter ends around where I intended to leave the fic off, but I realised that it just. Wasn’t going to work. That it would be too abrupt, because, honestly, the end of your story really shouldn’t also be the climax lmao. So, now there’s going to be a third part, but I have a few other wips that I need to update first, so it might not be out until the new year. I appreciate your patience ♥
> 
> Alright, there is a bit of dialogue taken from Titans Rebirth vol. 1 and from various issues of the Heroes in Crisis run in this chapter, so, you know, credit where credit is due. I don’t think any new trigger warnings apply, except maybe for a type of panic attack [and the spoiler-trigger warning in the endnotes], but I will say that the whole D/s vibe comes through even more in this chapter, imo. It wasn’t my intention to mislead in calling it undertones, but, apparently, I’m just. Incapable of doing that. My bad.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for sticking it out if you’re here to read part two, and I hope it was worth waiting for. Enjoy!

Wally smiles to himself as he follows the familiar sound of Linda’s quiet singing to the kitchen, lingering in the doorway when he reaches it to take in the scene. Her back is turned to him as she stands in front of the sink, yellow rubber gloves up to her elbows as she scrubs the dishes from dinner. She bobs along with the song playing lowly on the radio, and Wally feels his heart swell with affection for her even as his gaze slides off to the side of the kitchen where Jai and Irey are sitting at the table with a deck of cards between them; Crazy 8s, if he were a guessing person.

Irey scowls as she draws three new cards before finally getting one she can play, and Jai’s smug laughter as he immediately puts another card down of the same suit finally draws him into the room.

“Who’s winning?”

Irey turns her scowl on him at that, but it does nothing to dampen the bright grin on Wally’s face as he reaches out to ruffle her hair.

“Irey sucks at this game,” Jai pipes up, and Wally chuckles.

“Hey, be nice,” he chastises gently, “It’s all in the luck of the draw!”

Irey turns back to her brother, sticking out her tongue as she draws another card. Her eyes light up with a rather self-satisfied gleam as she lays the eight down and announces a new suit, and Jai groans.

“Sounds like the tides are turning,” Wally teases, ruffling Jai’s hair, too, before he steps back, “Good luck, kiddo.”

He moves over to Linda then, stepping up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist as he drops a kiss against her jaw.

“Hello, beautiful,” he says smoothly, and he laughs when she flicks wet, soapy water at him from over her shoulder.

She hums, relaxing against him as she finishes the last of the dishes and then pulls the plug from the drain.

“How is it that the Fastest Man Alive is always late to help with the dishes?” She teases, and Wally smirks as he tucks his face into her hair and inhales her scent.

“You coulda left them,” he points out, “I can finish them and still greet you with a kiss before you even realise I’m home.”

Linda huffs, and Wally imagines the way she must be rolling her eyes at him.

“Speaking of greetings…” He hedges after a few seconds, and she turns around as he loosens his arms, her own moving to wrap around his shoulders as she leans in to kiss him. Wally melts into it with a sigh, drawing her closer as he deepens the kiss. He steps back after a moment, pulling Linda with him, and he dips her playfully and he kisses her until they’re both breathless.

One of the kids feigns gagging from behind him, and, distantly, Wally registers himself wishing that he could stay in this moment forever.

Linda pushes at his shoulder eventually, and he straightens, pulling her back up with him, and he smiles at the faint blush on her cheeks.

“Wallace,” she says, attempting - but failing - to sound stern, “Behave. We have company.”

Wally blinks, his brow furrowing in confusion as he follows her gaze back towards the doorway he’d entered through just moments before, and he sucks in a sharp breath. Jay is standing there, her lips curled into a playful pout as she picks nervously at the hem of her skirt.

“Took you long enough,” she simpers as she pushes away from the doorframe and walks over to him.

Wally feels frozen as her arms wrap around his shoulders, mimicking the way Linda’s had been positioned earlier, and she flutters her lashes at him coyly before leaning in to steal a kiss. He makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat, but when he raises his hands to push her away, he ends up grabbing her hips, instead, and pressing into her kiss. She smiles at him as she pulls away, and Wally blinks, feeling stunned, before he whirls around to face Linda with wide, guilty eyes.

“Linda, I-”

But Linda doesn’t look angry, or sad, or even _hurt_ , when he looks at her. No, she’s _smiling_ , soft and sweet, and his words die in his throat.

“Shh,” she murmurs as she steps back into his space, her palming cupping his cheek as she leans in and brushes a gentle kiss over his lip before resting her forehead against his, “I understand, Wally.”

Jay’s hand slides over his shoulder, and Wally winces, shutting his eyes.

“Sanctuary?” He whispers.

“Yes, Wally?”

“I’m ready to leave.”

* * *

Wally has trouble shaking the session, the guilt seemingly gnawing at him as he leaves the Chamber. His feet carry him automatically to Roy’s room, but he finds himself hesitating before he knocks because there’s such a high chance that Jay will be in there, too, and he’s not sure he’s ready to face her.

In the end, he turns and carries on to his own room, slipping inside and flicking the lock behind himself before he drops down onto his bed. He stares at the ceiling for a while, attempting to will his mind into blankness, and he sighs when it fails. Wally reaches up to remove his mask and sets it aside on the nightstand before he rolls over onto his side, his knees drawing up towards his chest as he curls in on himself.

What is he doing here?

He’d come to Sanctuary to try to find a way to cope with the loss of his former life. The loss of his wife and their kids. Is he taking the coward’s way out by trying to “move on” instead of adjust? Or is this the only real path to healing?

What would Linda say? _His_ Linda, that is, not the- The _copy_ running around in this universe.

What had she said to him, that day in the speedforce?

_“You have to let me go now.”_

_“You’re confused, Wally.”_

_“All the possibilities and alternatives cluttering your mind have to go, no matter how fond you are of them.”_

She would support this then, wouldn’t she? She would be… willing to see him move on and be happy again?

But hadn’t she also told him to give the other her a chance? Hadn’t she encouraged him to get to know the Linda of this world, to try to start over with her?

Then again, wasn’t that kind of all in his own head, too?

Wally groans, his eyes screwed shut so tightly that he can see white spots blinking behind his eyelids.

Nothing about this is _fair_ , dammit. Why does he have to make this choice? This, this _impossible_ choice? Why him?

Why is he struggling so much with it? Surely no one else would. Put any other hero in his shoes, and Wally is sure they’d know exactly what they needed to do.

And where do Jay and Roy come into this, anyway?

Would he be struggling with this same problem if they weren’t here? If Roy hadn’t tried his hand at playing God, at deciding that he knows what’s best for everyone? Isn’t Jay just meant to be a convenient distraction? A way for him to dip his toes back into the water and decide if he wants to dive in or stay on familiar land? Isn’t Roy just him grasping at something safe? Something familiar, comfortable?

Couldn’t he still decide to stop this nonsense and resolve to try again with Linda? He wouldn’t even have to tell her, probably. He could pretend none of this ever happened, pretend he had never waivered, that he had always stayed faithful, had always kept his hope that they’d come back together. Who would know, really?

What happens at Sanctuary stays at Sanctuary, right?

God, but how was that fair to Roy? To _Jay_?

What did it make _him_ , if he had just used Jay as a springboard, as another step towards his own recovery with no consideration for her? Roy was- Different. Their history had always had a certain come-and-go nature to it, like a well-worn safety blanket that you could return to when you needed it. He wouldn’t hold any of this against him.

But Jay-

God, she didn’t deserve it, did she? What did she even think about all of this? She’s in love with Roy, anyway, so why should she really have anything invested in their- Well, whatever this is? Would she really care if Wally decided to bow out?

He thinks about how she feels when she’s cuddling up to him, even when they haven’t just had sex. Especially then, really. Thinks of the comfort that radiates from her as she nuzzles his neck, as her fingers trace absent patterns over his chest. Thinks of the hesitant look in her eyes when she tips her head back to look at him, when she asks if he’s okay.

Thinks of the look in her eyes when he’s gentle with her and how it almost looks _softer_ than the way she looks at Roy. Thinks about how he made that promise to himself to give her some of the affection that Roy was withholding and wonders if maybe it was a little _too_ effective, if he’s somehow conned her into developing feelings for him.

Is it really so wrong to keep going as they are if they’re both getting something out of it?

Yes, he knows, it is. It really, _really_ is, because he can’t knowingly bring Jay to rely on this, to rely on _him_ , if he’s not all-in. If there’s still a chance that he might pull the rug out from under her.

She’s here, after all. That should tell him all he needs to know about her own mental state. Throw in her own issues with her family - with the _Bats_ \- and he’d have to be the biggest piece of shit in the world to use her like that. How many times has she been through that before? Been strung along with false promises of happiness, and security, and _love_ , only to be turned out at the first sign of trouble?

He can’t do that to her, too. He can’t teach her to rely on him and then turn around and decide to go back to Linda in a few months’ time. Can’t leave Roy to catch her once again when he’s here, too, already trying to deal with so much of his own bullshit.

_Fuck._

He’s backed himself into a corner without really noticing, hasn’t he? And he needs to decide fast what he plans on doing about it.

* * *

Roy’s always had this way of making Wally forget all of his anxieties, though. He’d just about resolved to talk to Jay, to tell her that he’s not in any place to be doing this, that he can’t keep doing what he’s been doing when his head is such a mess already. That he never should have gotten involved with her in the first place.

But then, Roy.

Wally’s never really been able to say no to him, not when it counts, so it really shouldn’t be any surprise that he’d allowed Roy to drag him in deeper.

Maybe he’s just weak. Weak enough that a few rough words whispered against his ear have him hard and aching, staring up at Jay in awe as she lowers herself onto his cock. And, God, but she feels _good_ , hot, and wet, and seemingly moulded to fit around his dick perfectly. It’s more than enough to chase away any doubts that this is wrong, that he shouldn’t be doing this.

After all, how could something that feels so _good_ ever be bad for them?

His hands skate up her sides as she reaches back to hold her ankles, her body arching as she puts her chest on display, and she moans as he cups her breasts. He squeezes at them, catching her nipples between his fingers and pinching as she rolls her hips and whimpers.

God, but she’s gorgeous like this.

No. Not just like this: she’s just gorgeous. Period.

He tells her as much, and the embarrassment brought on by Roy’s amused snort is worth it for the blush that paints itself across her cheeks. For the wide-eyed look she gives him, like she can’t believe the words that just came out of his mouth. Wally smiles at her, his gaze raking all along her body and then lingering just as long on her face, and her blush only darkens, her eyes shining as she gazes down at him until Roy slides in behind her and cups his hand around her throat. Her head falls back, then, breaking their eye contact, and Roy mouths at her jaw as his other hand drags down over her front to where the two of them are joined.

She whimpers sharply, her hips bucking wildly for a moment as Roy teases her clit, and Wally feels his own mouth go dry as he watches Roy’s grip on her throat tighten, cutting off her vocalisations.

“You’re so fucking easy, slut,” he hums, and Wally groans at the way she clenches around him suddenly and reaches up to hold Roy’s arm with both her hands, “That all it takes, hm? A few sweet words and you’ll give us whatever we want? _Pathetic_.”

Her rhythm stutters slightly, and Wally gropes at her breasts one last time before dropping his hands to her hips, steadying her as her jaw works soundlessly and Roy squeezes even harder.

“I think you’d give it to us anyway,” Roy continues, and even Wally shivers at the utter disinterest in his tone, “And you’re going to, aren’t you? _Aren’t you?_ ”

Jay gives a tight, jerky nod, and Roy’s lips curl into a smirk.

_“Good girl,”_ he coos mockingly, and Jay trembles as Roy chokes her a few moments longer before suddenly letting go. He nudges at the back of her neck, and she leans forward obediently, her hands moving to Wally’s shoulders. She jolts when Roy slaps her ass, whimpering as she rocks herself back and forth on Wally’s cock, and Wally’s own hands slip back further, groping at her ass and dragging her forward.

Wally’s moan catches in his throat when he feels Roy shove two fingers into Jay alongside his cock, and she gives a sharp gasp of her own, her legs shaking where he can feel them pressed against his own thighs as she pushes back against the both of them.

“Yeah?” Roy purrs, “You like that, slut? Wally’s cock not enough for you?”

Jay whimpers, her eyes squeezing shut as she clenches around them. Her walls tremble and spasm as she comes, and Roy chuckles as he works a third finger in.

“Damn,” he murmurs, and Wally groans as he reaches for Jay’s hips again, steadying her as he thrusts up into her when she starts to slow, “That all it’s gonna take, huh? What are you gonna do when I split you open on my cock, too?”

Wally swears under his breath, his eyes wide and wild as he looks at Roy over Jay’s shoulder; the dark look in the other man’s eyes has a shiver running down his spine.

“What d’ya say, Wally?” Roy asks, voice raising to talk over Jay’s cry when he forces a fourth finger into her, and Wally moans again at how fucking _tight_ she is right now, how much tighter she’ll be if Roy does what he’s talking about, “You think we should show her a real good time? Wreck her sweet little cunt together and leave her loose and gaping and ruined?”

Jay whimpers again, her eyes flying open as she stares down at Wally in shock, and he feels heat growing in his belly at the startled but aroused expression on her face. God, it’s been so long, but Wally knows how she feels, knows the trepidation and anxiety, but also the fierce, burning desire at the thought of being torn apart on two dicks. It’s been even longer since he was on this side of it, too, and a tremor of excitement runs through him.

“Yes,” he croaks, his grip on Jay’s hips tightening as he pulls her down on his cock, driving a sharp cry out of her, “Yeah, fuck, _Roy_ , do it. C’mon, fuck, she can take it.”

Wally nearly cries when Roy withdraws his fingers a few seconds later, leaving her loose around him in a way he’s never felt her before, but all he really manages is a low whine before Roy’s hand is in Jay’s hair and pushing her down against him. And then he’s there, too, the blunt head of his cock pushing in above his own, and Wally can’t fight the moan that tears out of him as Roy sinks into her, his cock dragging along Wally’s own and pressing it down against the slick, heated muscles of her cunt.

Jay muffles a scream against his shoulder, bucking like she wants to pull away, and Wally drags a hand up her back to cup the back of her head as he unconsciously thrusts up into her, drawing matching groans from Roy and himself.

“Fuck,” Roy grunts, one hand settling at the small of Jay’s back as the other grabs at her hip to steady her as he wastes no time in starting to move. His dick is hot and hard against Wally’s, dragging along it with the most delicious friction as Jay trembles around them both, her breath puffing out against his neck and shoulder as she gasps.

“Yeah,” Roy goes on, his own eyes shutting for a moment as he tips his head back, “That’s it. Fuck, shoulda done this ages ago. So tight, sweetheart, shit.”

Jay whimpers, blinking overstimulated tears from her eyes as she manages to lift her head, and Wally’s fingers twist into her hair before he drags her forward and kisses her hard as he rolls his own hips up, a slow grind compared to the way Roy is picking up speed as he pounds into her mercilessly. She moans into his mouth, kissing back almost clumsily, and it only serves to turn Wally on even more.

“Your pussy’s never gonna be the same after this, bitch,” Roy grits out as he continues to move, “Gonna have to take you just like this all the time, stuff you full to feel anything cuz your cunt is stretched and ruined like a proper slut.”

Jay sobs against Wally’s mouth as she clenches around them instinctively, almost like she wants to prove she still can, to prove she can make herself tight for them. He pulls back slightly, his mouth trailing down to nibble at her jaw, and Wally glances up at her through his lashes. She’s so flushed, her eyes wide and wet and her lips parted around high moans of pleasure, and Wally swears as a familiar feeling crashes over him, leaving him hot and tingling all over as his cock jerks and spills inside her.

Roy gives a breathless chuckle at that and shifts to hold onto both of Jay’s hips, dragging her back hard against him to meet each rough thrust. “That’s it,” he groans, “Fill her up, Wally, fuck, s’even better when she’s sloppy and wet, isn’t it?” Wally makes a low noise in the back of his throat, agreement and arousal and overwhelm all rolled up into one expression, and, fuck, he’s still hard, of course he is. It makes it easy to keep going, to keep rocking up into her, his cock pushing deeper to fill the empty space left behind each time Roy pulls back.

“Just like old times, isn’t it?” Roy growls as Jay shakes and trembles between them with a shout, her cunt contracting around them as she gushes, hot and wet, around them, “How long’s it been, hm? _Fuck_ , missed wrecking your sloppy cunt like this, Donna, shit, feels so good, baby girl.”

Wally’s breath catches in his throat, his eyes blowing wide as they raise to look at Jay again. It’s like everything else whites out in that moment, his ears ringing as he stares up at Jay and watches her expression fall, watches the way she closes her eyes for a long moment and grits her teeth before forcing out an exhale, the stricken look easily replaced by resignation, and then, abruptly, determination, when she opens her eyes again. Wally wants to scream. He can feel it building in his chest, and he drags her down instead, kissing her hard before he drags his mouth up to her ear, nibbling at the lobe.

“Jay,” he breathes, and she makes a low, wounded noise in the back of her throat, “Fuck, _Jay_ , you’re so good. God, you feel amazing, darling.”

It’s a paltry consolation, he knows, but he doesn’t know what else to _do_ ; Roy doesn’t even seem to have noticed his slip, his continuing words nothing but a dull roar against Wally’s eardrums, but there’s no tone of apology to go along with them.

He reaches between himself and Jay then, his fingers finding her clit easily and rubbing over it as he continues to murmur against her ear, praising her and saying her name, reassuring her that he, at least, knows who he’s with. That he _sees_ her. A single tear slides down the curve of her cheek, and Wally catches it on his lips before drawing her into another kiss, his fingers drawing a sharp gasp from her as they start to vibrate. He doesn’t let up, just keeps going until she’s squirming above him and gasping against his lips, until she’s clenching around them again with another orgasm, and then his cock starts to vibrate, too, and Roy swears, his pace quickening.

Because maybe Wally can’t fix this, can’t take away what just happened, but he has more than a few tricks to help _end_ it.

Jay whines against him and finally pulls away, biting down on his shoulder as his assault on her nerves continues until, finally, Roy is coming with a long groan, the feeling of his release dripping down over Wally’s cock pushing him into his own second orgasm. Jay screams through one last climax before Wally slows the vibrations of both his dick and his fingers until they finally come to a stop and she sinks against him like her strings have been cut.

Roy slumps forwards over Jay’s body, pinning her between them, and the three of them stay just like that for a long moment as they catch their breath and come down from the exertion. Jay’s the first to start moving, squirming between them as she tries to lift her head, and Wally reaches up to nudge Roy off of them. Roy goes easily, rolling over onto his back and smirking up at the ceiling as Wally helps Jay steady herself before she climbs off of him. She seems to hesitate for a moment before squeezing in between them, and Wally’s heart aches for her, for the way she probably wants nothing more than to flee and lick her wounds in peace.

If he were in her position, he’d hate to know that someone had seen through his pain so easily. The embarrassment would threaten to drive him halfway across the globe as fast as his legs could carry him. And Jay is _proud_ ; it must be killing her to think that Wally is pitying her.

She’s tense between them, not feeling comfortable curling into either of them, for once, and Wally could throttle Roy for what he’s just done. Instead, he turns onto his side and drops a kiss to her shoulder as he reaches across her to grab her hip, his fingers gently massaging against her skin. She gives a slow exhale, her eyes shut tightly, and Wally can feel the way she trembles with tension even as she tries to make herself relax.

He kisses her shoulder again and waits for the tension to subside.

* * *

Jay slips away not long after that, claiming she’s still too keyed up to sleep and needs a smoke; Wally has his doubts - knows better, if he’s being completely honest - and he reaches out to catch her hand as she gets out of bed. Their eyes meet for a moment, and the smile she gives him is so deeply pained that he can’t bear to keep holding on when she pulls free. He watches as she pulls her clothes and her robe back on, as she sticks her domino mask back over her eyes, and wills himself not to turn on Roy right then and there. Jay probably wouldn’t appreciate him causing a scene, and that’s the only thing that stops him as he watches her slip out into the hall without a backwards look.

Roy huffs when the door closes behind her and rolls over, nuzzling into Wally’s shoulder and brushing his lips over his skin.

“She’ll be back,” he says, and Wally gets the distinct impression that Roy is trying to reassure him.

So maybe he can feel something of the tension thrumming through him, then.

“Yeah,” Wally murmurs, and he wonders if Roy knows what he’s talking about, wonders just how much he realises that Jay will keep coming back no matter how many times he hurts her. Wonders if he realises just how much he’s taking her loyalty for granted.

If he does, it doesn’t seem like it bothers him much. Roy dozes off not long after, and Wally tries to do the same, but his thoughts are racing too fast to allow him any rest.

It must be so hard for her, he thinks, to always be second best (less than, perhaps, because Wally’s _seen_ Bruce with all of his kids, at this point, and it doesn’t really paint the greatest picture). He was there when Jay first became Robin, too, and he still remembers, with no small amount of shame, the way that he and the other Titans - and, Hell, just about everyone in the League, too - only ever really saw her as not-Dick.

And now she’s Roy’s glorified stand-in for Donna, and--

And his own, for Linda. If he’s being honest.

He can’t imagine that Jay doesn’t know it, too.

Wally’s no stranger to self-esteem issues, to feeling like you’re not good enough, like you’re _replaceable_ and _unnecessary_. Like you’ll never be someone’s first choice. Like you should at least try to be _useful_ so they’ll keep you around anyway.

And Linda and the Titans, they’d helped him with that, helped him move past it and accept that he’s not just “the other Flash”, not just a redundancy and a second-rate speedster, not just someone to warm the bed with when there’s no one else around, but he still _remembers_ the feeling.

The point is, he knows how she probably feels - and it sits uncomfortably in his gut to realise that he may be just another person re-enforcing that for her.

Wally slips out of bed after a while, keeping quiet so as not to rouse Roy, and dresses himself to go out into the common space. It’s not quite late enough that no one is about, but no one really pays him any mind when he makes his way down the hall and out the front door. He looks around for a moment before spotting a figure sitting alone on a small hilltop a few yards from the house and starts to make his way over.

He can tell as he gets closer that it’s definitely Jay, and he pauses, his head cocking to the side curiously, as he watches little white bits scattering in the wind as she flicks them from between her fingers. He has the fleeting thought that maybe she’s tearing up the pages of a diary, or perhaps an ill-advised love-letter to Roy.

As he starts moving again and gets closer, though, Wally sees that it’s not actually paper that she’s shredding; they’re flower petals, pulled from their pistils and scattered into the breeze. He imagines, for a moment, that he can actually hear the words he’s sure she must be reciting in her mind.

_He loves me._

_He loves me not._

Pity sinks like a stone in his gut, and Wally’s hands clench into fists at his sides. He’s not too proud to admit that a part of him wants to turn around and find Roy, wants to drive his fist into his friend’s face and demand an explanation for what he’s playing at. To beg him to admit that he really is just that oblivious and doesn’t know what he’s doing to Jay.

Instead, he keeps walking and makes sure that his footfalls land loudly enough for Jay to hear him approaching.

“Don’t let Ivy see you doing that,” he jokes as he stops next to her, and she huffs a small laugh as she lets go of another petal before tilting her head to look up at him. She drops the half-plucked flower back onto the ground, and Wally nearly loses his breath as he watches the way the hurt and sadness melts from her expression only to be replaced with flirtation. It doesn’t look any different than it usually does, and, yet, Wally can’t help but feel that it looks _wrong_. Misplaced.

Fake.

“What can I do for you, West?” She asks as she shifts, turning towards him a little more fully and brushing her lips over the front of his thigh, and Wally’s breath catches despite himself. He’s only human, okay, and he knows exactly how good that mouth feels wrapped around his dick - and when she’s on the ground in front of him like this, his mind can’t exactly ignore the thought.

She arches slightly when he reaches down to brush her bangs away from her eyes, and she lifts one hand to his groin, the pad of her thumb teasing the length of his zipper before moving as if to pop the button. Wally’s hand snaps out to stop her, gripping perhaps a bit too tightly, at first, until he catches the slight grimace on her face. He loosens his grip as he takes a breath, giving her a gentle squeeze in apology.

It’s just.

_Fuck._

He isn’t sure if she’s leaning into sexuality as a cover for feeling vulnerable - something he knows all too well that her older brother is wont to - or if she genuinely thinks that that’s the only reason he would seek her out.

Looking back at their interactions since all this started, Wally can’t exactly fault her for jumping to such a conclusion, if that’s the case.

It’s an uncomfortable realization.

Almost as uncomfortable as the way the hurt floods back into her expression before she can stop it, making her eyes shine and her bottom lip quiver.

Jesus Christ, he’s been an asshole. He has no right being angry with Roy if he’s not going to be angry with himself, too. Maybe it’s not the same, maybe it’s still _worse_ what Roy is doing, dragging her along after him when he so clearly doesn’t return her affection (because fuck giving Roy the benefit of the doubt; he has to know. How could he _not_?), but-

God, she’s so _young_ , Wally’s not sure if she’s even twenty-one yet, and it’s so obvious right now with both sadness and the low light of sundown softening her features. Don’t they have some kind of obligation not to take advantage of her like this? Because that’s what they’ve been doing, isn’t it?

Fuck, does she even _want_ to have sex with him? Or has she been doing it for the same reason she seemingly does everything else in the bedroom - because Roy expressed that he wanted her to?

He lets go of her a second later, snatching his own hand back like he’s been burned, and looks down at her with wide eyes. The bitterness and self-contempt that twists her features next hits even harder than the hurt did, and Wally has to swallow against the bile that rises in his throat.

_“Idiot,”_ her expression seems to read, _“You really thought he’d want you?”_

Wally swallows again and then slowly lowers himself to sit down, flashing her a smile that he can only hope passes muster.

“I didn’t come out here for that,” he tells her gently, and then he pats the grass next to him, “Sit with me?”

She hesitates for a moment, but finally scoots over to sit next to him, and the tension in her shoulders slowly starts to ease away when he wraps an arm around them and pulls her in against his side.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” He asks, his gaze fixed ahead of him, watching as the sun sets, and he hears her take a sharp inhale before she lets it out and lets herself really lean into him, “Couldn’t tell you the last time I stopped to watch one.”

“Not used to seeing them from the ground,” Jay mumbles, and Wally can’t help but chuckle.

“Bats,” he says, rolling his eyes playfully, and she huffs, nudging against him with her shoulder.

“Shut up.”

He laughs again, and Jay settles against him even more comfortably, falling silent as they watch the sun sink further towards the horizon.

Wally allows himself to be quiet for a while, too, taking a few slow, calming breaths to try and calm his ever-racing mind so that he can actually _focus_. His mind eventually drifts back to the moment he’d interrupted her, recalling in vivid detail every minute change to Jay’s expression, and it doesn’t make him any less uncomfortable than it did the first time. He’d be willing to bet that she really _did_ think it was why he was looking for her; using sex as a defense mechanism just… doesn’t seem like her.

Then again, can he really say that he knows her all that well?

Regardless, if he operates under that assumption, well, Wally doesn’t really like the picture that he sees.

Because it paints the picture of a young woman who is so desperate to be _seen_ , to be _wanted_ , that she’s willing to take whatever scraps she’s given. A girl who is in love with her best friend who, in turn, is only sleeping with her because she’s there and willing whilst his heart is caught up in someone else. And she _knows_ it.

He thinks back to what had happened earlier that day and can’t shake the sneaking suspicion that it’s not the first time it’s happened. Remembers in rapid-fire succession every time they’ve had sex and how Roy _never_ fucks her when she’s facing him - and, Hell, she’d _told_ him that, hadn’t she? The second time they hooked up, she’d been so _surprised_ that Wally wanted to see her face.

Because, if he’s not looking at her, Roy can see her long, dark hair and pretend she’s someone else.

And Roy pushes her and pushes her, but he’s always been like that, so Wally can’t really infer anything from that - except that Jay meets every suggestion and degrading comment with agreement, and he doesn’t know enough to say if she’s just _like that_ , like _him_ , or if it’s because it’s Roy asking. And if it’s the latter…

If it’s the latter, Wally never should have gotten mixed up in this with them.

And maybe it’s too late to take it all back, just like he'd considered earlier, because, Christ, she’d looked so hurt over the way he’d rejected her advances just now; if he tries to completely bow out of their little arrangement--

Well, Wally isn’t sure he even wants to think about how much it would hurt her. But he _can_ resolve to do better, can’t he? He can resolve to actually get to _know_ the girl sitting next to him - the girl he’s been _sleeping with_ , for fuck’s sake. To see her as more than just a means to an end, as a form of stress relief and rediscovered intimacy.

Wally thinks, for a fleeting moment, about telling Dick what’s been going on, and shame washes over him and leaves him feeling hot. He’s sure his best friend would be tearing into him right now if he knew that Wally had been--

Had been _using_ his little sister the way he has been.

Jay deserves better than that - in the way that _anyone_ does, of course, but also because she’s _Jay_. Because the glimpses of the real her that Wally has managed to see tell him that she’s brilliant and so very capable. That she’s compassionate, and loyal, and _selfless_.

And that she is painfully, heartbreakingly _lonely_.

Cast out of her home by a father who has brought her to significant physical harm more than once and estranged from the rest of her family, all while struggling to carry the loss of her most recent team. Roy is _all she has_ , especially with Kori off in space again. It’s no wonder she’s willing to put up with so much if it just means that she still has him. Still has _someone_.

Wally’s going to make himself be that someone - or, at least, one of them. Because she deserves to have that, and because he can’t stand the thought of disappointing his best friend. Because he _knows_ Linda would be ashamed of his behaviour.

Because he’d have wrung the neck of anyone who treated Irey that way if she’d had the chance to grow up properly.

Not because he wants to keep fucking around with her guilt-free.

He comes back to the present long after the sun has already gone down, jolting slightly when he realises it but relaxing when Jay turns her head and presses a kiss to his shoulder.

“Welcome back,” she hums, and Wally feels it when she tries to suppress a shiver. He frowns and readjusts his grip on her, tugging her even closer against him and then starting to rub her arm.

“You okay?” She asks after a few seconds have passed, and Wally lets out a slow breath.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, thinking that he should be the one asking her that question, “Yeah, I’m alright, Jay. Thanks for sitting with me, I guess I wasn’t much for company.”

Jay just shrugs and leans her head against his shoulder for a second before she produces a carefully woven crown of flowers and holds it up.

“It’s okay,” she says with a small smile curling her lips, “I’m pretty good at keeping myself busy.”

_Yeah,_ Wally supposes, _I bet you probably are, aren’t you?_

Her smile fades slightly, and she starts to lower the crown back into her lap. Wally could kick himself.

“S’pretty,” he finally says, and then he reaches out to take it from her and positions it carefully on her head, “It suits you.”

He can’t really see it in the low starlight, but the way she ducks her head and brushes her hair behind her ear has Wally picturing the delicate blush that’s probably spreading across her cheeks. He takes her hand, then, and starts to stand up, pulling her up with him and turning towards her for a moment.

She blinks up at him, confusion flickering across her features as she tries and fails to determine the correct expression that she thinks he’s expecting from her, and Wally’s heart _aches_. He leans in, pressing his lips to her forehead and letting them linger for a moment, and the confusion remains even as it’s joined by a raw look of what he can only describe as _longing_.

“C’mon,” he says as he squeezes her hand and turns back towards the house, “Let’s head back inside.”

* * *

Wally kind of wants to scream when he sees the way Roy and Jay are with each other the next day, Roy seemingly oblivious to his mistake the night before and Jay so ready to push it aside and play her role. Honestly, he feels a little sick watching Roy press his lips to Jay’s temple and wrap his arm around her waist, watching Jay look over at him with those wide, trusting eyes when Roy himself isn’t looking.

God, this is a mess, and he’s _involved_ now, can’t just go on ignoring it, but he has no idea how to start untangling this knot.

Roy’s distracted for much of the afternoon, practically glued to his phone as he fires off texts, and Wally isn’t surprised to see Donna’s name when he manages to catch a glimpse of the screen. But he still lets Jay curl into his side after she leaves and comes back, wraps his arm around her shoulders and tucks his chin against the top of her head when she lays it on his shoulder. Wally can’t help the frown that tugs at his lips and pulls his brow down when she cuts him a hard look.

It could be a “don’t you dare judge me,” or a “don’t try to take this away from me,” or any number of other sentiments, and Wally is uncomfortable with the way he doesn’t know her well enough to decipher it for himself. Shouldn’t he know her better than that now, all things considered?

Linda. Dick. Roy. Garth, Donna, Lilith… He’d always been able to read each of them.

God, what is he _doing?_

He shakes his head slightly, his teeth worrying at his bottom lip as his gaze flicks from her to Roy and then back again, and something in her features softens slightly. Her lips twist into a sad smile, and Wally sees the way her shoulder lifts ever-so-slightly as if to shrug.

They chat idly, with Roy throwing in his own two cents every so often, but when Roy finally puts his phone away and drops his hand from Jay’s shoulder to slide it up under the hem of her shirt, instead, Wally finds that he can’t do it, can’t stick around and be a part of it again. He stands up suddenly, and Roy’s brow creases as he looks up at him.

“Wally?” He asks uncertainly, and Wally can only stare down at them silently for a few moments before he shakes his head and turns to walk away. Before he does, he catches the hurt look on Jay’s face and has to grit his own teeth to keep from apologizing.

“Jesus, what’s with him today?” He hears Roy ask, but the door closes behind him before he can catch Jay’s response if she offers one.

He wanders the grounds for a while after that, anger and frustration bubbling beneath his skin, and, damn. Damn, he wants to _run_ , wants to burn off the nervous energy thrumming through him and not have to think for a while.

He could be back before anyone even _notices_ , though he’d rather take his time. And he can, can’t he? It’s not like he’ll really be missed, not if Jay and Roy will be keeping each other busy for a while.

Wally exhales slowly, letting a familiar sense of calm descend over him, and then he’s gone, nothing but a trail of lightning left to singe the grass in his wake.

* * *

He feels calmer when he returns a few hours later, a familiar tiredness weighing him down and making his muscles burn, and it’s. It’s good.

He needed that, probably. A speedster isn’t meant to be kept so stationary for so long.

And it _has_ been a while, hasn’t it? Three weeks, just about, since he’d first crossed the threshold into Sanctuary.

So much has happened in that short time, and yet he isn’t sure that he’s actually made any real _progress_.

But running gave him time to think, and Wally decides that he’s the one holding himself back, not anyone else. That maybe, just maybe, moving on really is what he should be trying to do.

He’s still not sure, though, where exactly Jay and Roy fit into that.

* * *

He’s passing by Jay’s room on his way to his own when he hears it - a loud, hitching sob - and it stops him cold.

And it’s not his place, maybe, but he can’t… He can’t just _walk away_ , not when he knows that she’s sitting in her room _crying_. He knocks before he even makes the conscious decision to do so, and then holds his breath, waiting for--

The door opens and even with the domino mask covering her eyes - a precaution, he supposed, because she has no way of knowing who might be at her door, or maybe she'd been so upset that she didn't stop to take it off in the first place - he can still see the evidence on her face, can still see the tear tracks making a path down her cheeks and the quiver of her lip. She sucks in a breath when she recognizes him and another sob wracks through her before she throws herself at him, and Wally winds his arms around her as he pulls her closer.

It isn’t hard to pick her up, just like he'd seen Roy do before, to close the door behind himself and carry her back over to the bed. To lay her down and crawl over her and gently peel the mask away from her eyes so that he can peer down into them even as they overflow with tears and she turns her face away from him.

“Jay,” he whispers, and she shakes as another sob tears out of her, “Oh, Jay.”

He bundles her close and rolls over onto his back, holding her against him as she lets herself cry, as she twists the fabric of his robe into her hands and clings to him. He lets go only long enough to discard his own mask and then rubs soothing circles into her back as he quietly reassures her that he’s here, that she’s not alone.

“Why won’t he choose me?” She chokes out, sounding more broken than Wally thinks he’s ever heard someone, and he wonders, for a moment, if she means Roy or if maybe she means Bruce, if this is a delayed response to whatever had happened in her Chamber session earlier.

For all he knows, it could be both.

“It’s- It’s all in _my_ head, and I still can’t make him choose me,” she continues, and it reassures him, at least, that Roy hasn’t fucked up again, but that’s all it really tells him.

His heart aches either way, because he gets it. He really does.

Every damn time he goes into that simulation, he’s left feeling bereft. Feeling like he’s losing his family all over again. Like he’s _abandoning_ them. He knows he needs to let them go, needs to make _himself_ make _them_ let him go, if he really intends to move on, but he just.

He can’t.

So, yeah. He gets it.

Wally presses her closer to him as he ducks his head to bury a kiss against her crown, and she trembles against him, taking these quick, hitching breaths that can’t actually be helping her any.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I’m so sorry, Jay.”

He stays just like that, holding her in his arms until she finally cries herself out, and then holds her longer still, drawing her back in when she tries to pull away, when she tries to kiss him and then starts crying all over again when he turns his face away from her.

“Shh,” he murmurs, “You don’t have to do anything, Jay.”

God, he wishes she’d believe him, wishes she’d accept that he is willing to do just this, to provide comfort to a friend in distress without expecting anything in return.

“Let me just be here for you,” he adds, and he thinks the desperation in his voice is a little too raw, a little too honest, but he can’t make himself care because it makes her shiver and bury her face in his neck, her tears dripping down to wet his skin and the collar of his robe.

“You’re not alone,” he whispers against her hair, “You don’t have to be alone.”

She sobs, clinging to him more tightly, and Wally resolves to just be there with her to help her put herself back together when she’s ready.

He doesn’t intend to stay the night, but somewhere between Jay crying into his chest and his whispered words of reassurance, they peel out of their clothing and fall asleep, and Wally sleeps straight through the night; it’s the most peaceful sleep he’s had in a long time.

* * *

Wally awakens slowly, the heat and weight of another body draped over his own acting like a comforting blanket against the world. In those hazy moments of half-awake/half-asleep understanding, he thinks of Linda and nuzzles into the hair tickling just beneath his chin. He’d like to stay in this moment a while longer, he thinks, though he isn’t sure why it seems to be such a pressing thought.

He inhales slowly, the familiar scent of coconut shampoo nudging at his senses, and it takes him a long moment to register its familiarity as _wrong_.

Blinking his eyes open, Wally looks down at the mop of dark, tousled hair, and feels his heart stutter in his chest.

_Oh,_ he thinks mournfully, _Right._

He works to keep his breathing even, to keep his disappointment from coming out in a sigh or a whine, and the arm he has slung around Jay’s waist tightens. She stirs at that, her hand slipping up over his chest to cup the curve of his neck, and she gives a soft sigh before she opens her eyes and lifts her head.

“Morning,” she murmurs, and Wally’s heart catches in his throat as his heart stutters all over again.

_What the fuck._

“Good morning starshine,” he replies, his lips twisting into what he hopes looks like an easy grin. Her cheeks tint pink as she drops her gaze, lashes fanning out over the tops of them, and Wally swallows hard.

“The Earth says hello,” she finally replies, and his smile feels a little easier, then.

Right, Jay’s a theatre nerd. He totally knew that.

Wally hums, fingertips slowly tracing shapes against the small of her back, and Jay shivers against him.

She looks up at him again after a moment, her teeth worrying at her bottom lip as hesitance clouds her gaze. He makes an encouraging noise in the back of his throat, the tip of his nose dragging along her hairline before he presses a kiss to her forehead.

“Thank you,” she says, finally, and Wally’s fingers press just a little harder against her back.

“Of course,” he replies, and she ducks her head again. Wally frowns, shifting slowly to roll over until she’s pinned loosely beneath him.

“Hey,” he murmurs, and her gaze darts away for a few seconds before finally meeting his own, “I mean it, Jay. You don’t have to thank me. I wanted to be there for you.”

His heart aches as tears well in her eyes, nothing but a small squeak escaping when she opens her mouth, and Wally can’t take it; he dips down, pressing a lingering kiss to her lips. She melts into it immediately, her arms moving to wind around his shoulders as she presses closer to him, and Wally pushes down the spark of guilt he feels, as if doing this now will somehow negate what he’d told her the night before.

“Jay,” he breathes when they finally break apart, “I meant that, too. We don’t have to-”

“I _want_ to, Wally,” she interrupts, somehow succeeding in looking both vulnerable and fierce at the same time. She swallows hard before brushing a kiss over his jaw.

“Please,” she whispers, and Wally is only human.

It’s not like any of the other times they’ve slept together thus far; it feels distinctly _unlike_ fucking, if he’s being honest. He touches Jay slowly, gently, and she opens for him so beautifully, her cheeks and chest flushed as her breathing picks up. His lips follow a slow trail between her breasts before continuing down over her abdomen and lower belly. Her breath hitches more and more the lower he gets, and Wally hums when he feels her fingers curling into his hair.

_“Wally,”_ she gasps when his tongue first lavs over her clit. Her thighs twitch, wanting to pull together as he moves lower to replace the two fingers curled inside of her with his tongue, and Wally feels his own cock twitch with interest.

God, the taste of her. The _smell_ of her.

Wally wants to drown in it.

She mewls softly when he curls his tongue, fucks it in and out of her again and again at the same time that his thumb starts rubbing circles against her clit. She does move her legs then, bending her knees to draw them up until Wally’s face is trapped between strong thighs. Her fingers tighten in his hair for a moment before easing, massaging against his scalp as if in apology as she gives a low moan.

Her actions only spur him on, and Wally moans against her as he drags his tongue up her slit and then presses closer, feeling her wetness against his cheeks as he stabs his tongue into her again and drags it against velvet-soft walls.

He feels the trembling begin in her thighs a few heartbeats before she cries out, her fluids gushing over his tongue as her legs tighten around him, and Wally moans again as he drinks her down, his dick now rock-hard in his boxers as he grinds absently against the mattress.

He keeps licking at her even as she comes down from it, and she whimpers when he finally pulls out and drags his tongue over her lips and up to her clit, flicking over it with his tongue as he pulls his fingers away.

“Oh,” she gasps, her fingers tightening in his hair again, “Oh, _oh_ , Wally, _please_.”

Wally slides three fingers into her then, his lips closing around her clit before he starts to suck, and she clenches around him with another sharp cry. Her voice trembles over a moan as he sucks, as he works his fingers in and out of her with increasing speed, and the sound of them moving inside her is slick and filthy and _hot_.

He scrapes his teeth ever-so-gently over her clitoris, and she nearly chokes on the moan that tears out of her as she clamps around his fingers and comes again. Her legs fall open a moment later, and Wally can see her chest heaving as he looks up from beneath his lashes.

He keeps his fingers inside of her as he moves back up her body, curling them to rub gently at her g-spot, and she whimpers, eyes wet when she blinks up at him. Wally smirks and dips down, kissing her, and she groans at the taste of herself on his tongue.

“Please,” she whispers when he pulls back again, and he groans when she clenches pointedly around his fingers, “Please, please let me, _Wally_ , want to make you feel good, too, please, pleasepleasefuckme, Wally, _please_.”

Wally stares down at her as if in awe, his cock throbbing between his legs, and it takes him an embarrassingly long time to shake off the overwhelming cloud of arousal enveloping him.

“Shh,” he finally says as he pecks a kiss against her bottom lip and then another against her jaw, “Shh, darling, I will. I will, Jay, shh.”

She whimpers again, blinking up at him as she bites her lip against further pleas, and Wally is so, _so_ glad he can almost always go more than once right off the bat, because he’s sure he’s going to blow the second he breaches her.

He kisses her once more before he slides his fingers free, smiling slightly when she whines at the loss, and then shifts to help her wrap her legs around his waist. He reaches between them to grab his cock, then, dragging the head of it through her dripping slit several times before guiding it right to her opening. He grips hard at the base as he starts to push into her, trying to stave off his own excitement, and he can’t help but chuckle when she gives a frustrated huff when his fist meets her cunt, blocking him from going any deeper.

“Shh,” he teases, “I’m going to give you all of it.”

Her cheeks burn bright at that, but so do her eyes, and Wally’s chest feels impossibly full as he lets go of himself and slides home with a drawn-out groan. She clenches around him as soon as he starts to pull out, miraculously still holding onto his control, and Wally swears quietly.

“Darling, you’re still so fucking tight,” he groans, and she whines in response, her hips rolling up to take him back in the small amount he’d withdrawn.

God, but he knows that move. Knows the sheer desperation that it comes from, and Wally leans in to kiss her with a similar desperation, one hand running up her thigh until he can grab her ass as he presses the other forearm into the bed just above Jay’s head, using it as a support to keep himself from crushing her.

She kisses him back like she’s starving for it, and Wally rolls his own hips, pulling out slowly until there’s nothing but the head of his cock stretching her open and then presses back in just as slowly. Jay arches up against him, one hand clutching at his hair as the other clings to his back, her nails biting in against one of his traps.

He keeps at that excruciatingly slow pace for as long as he can, his mouth trailing down to her throat when she can’t stop breaking away from their kisses to moan instead.

“Harder,” she chokes out after several failed attempts, and her ‘please’ is more exhale than actual speaking; it makes heat flare inside him, and Wally shifts, straightening up as his hands move to grip her hips. She fists her own hands into the sheets as her legs fall open and blinks up at him hazily, her lips parted on hitching breaths and her hair sticking to the sweat on her face.

She looks _beautiful_.

Wally tightens his hold on her and pulls himself back before slamming into her hard enough that he has to yank her back down to keep her in place. She yelps, her eyes blowing wide with lust as he does it again, moving harder and faster with each thrust until he’s all but hammering into her, driving sharp, staccato cries out of her each time he pulls her down to meet him, forcing her to take him as deeply as she can.

Drools slips from the corner of her mouth as she moans, and she shudders all over when Wally growls down at her, her cunt clamping hot and tight around him as she comes, squirting up against him as her passage feels like it floods around his cock. Every slide of his dick squelches in the air, overpowering their voices, and Wally stares down at the wetness clinging to her pubic hair and her thighs as he lets himself move a little faster than he should, pistoning in and out of her for a few intense seconds before his own orgasm crashes over him and his cock jerks and pulses, spilling his release into her to mix with her own fluids.

Jay clenches around him dutifully, her hips rocking as his own movement starts to falter. He slumps against her when he finally stills, his mouth seeking hers out for a searing kiss as she slowly lifts her trembling legs and wraps them around him once more. The kiss gentles after a while until they’re doing little more than breathing against each other’s lips.

Neither of them comments on the fact that Wally is still hard until their heart rates have slowed and they’re no longer breathing like they’ve just run a marathon. Wally shifts, moving to pull out, and Jay’s legs tighten around him.

“Wally,” she says softly, and he looks at her, inhaling sharply at the adoring look in her eyes, “You can fuck me again, if you want to. I… Please? I want- _Please?_ ”

Wally blinks down at her dumbly for a moment, even as his dick twitches inside her, until she clenches around him again and he finally snaps out of it.

“Are you sure?”

She nods, rocking her hips slightly, and Wally looks at her a moment longer before nodding. He kisses her gently before he pushes himself back up, his hands moving to hold her thighs open as he rocks into her slowly.

She blinks up at him, gasps out a soft _‘oh’_ , and Wally holds her gaze the whole way through, lazy and unhurried as he fucks into her with short, deep strokes until she screws her eyes shut, tears beading at the corners of them as another, albeit weaker, orgasm hits her. Wally’s own climax follows only a moment later, and he buries himself as deep as he can get as he comes.

This time when he slumps back down, Wally lets his cock slip free and rolls onto his back, dragging Jay with him until she’s laying over him not unlike the position they’d slept in. She curls in close, her lips brushing over his pec with every shuddering breath she takes, and Wally swallows hard as he stares up at the ceiling with wide eyes. His hand rubs idly up and down her side as their legs tangle together, and Wally tries very, very hard to keep his mind in the moment, to not let it stray into panic and anxiety over the weird feeling in his chest.

It helps, a little, when Jay starts to tremble against him, gives him something else to focus on as he draws the sheets up around them and holds her close, whispers words of praise into her ear until she’s blinking at him hazily and leaning into his every touch.

That’s how Roy finds them a short while later, and Wally is fast enough to catch the blatant look of surprise on his friend’s face before he successfully covers it up.

“Up and at ‘em, lazy bastards,” he chirps as he opens the curtains on the window, and Jay groans as she ducks her head beneath the blankets.

“Ugh,” she bemoans, and Wally’s lips twitch into a smile, “Does it _ever_ rain in this part of the country?”

Roy laughs, and Jay kicks at him petulantly when he tugs the blanket off of them.

“Gotham has given you unrealistic weather expectations,” he says, and Wally exhales slowly, letting their playful ribbing wash away the sense of impending doom he’d felt the moment Roy had walked in and seen them.

Because if anyone else will be able to see Wally’s confusion right now, it’s Roy Harper.

And he’s not sure if he’s ready for that; someone else knowing would make it _real_.

Wally thinks he’d much rather live in denial just a little longer.

* * *

Breakfast isn't the awkward affair Wally had been expecting, but then, it's not like Roy could _see_ what they'd just done. What he'd seen was nothing more than a little post-coital cuddling.

So why had he looked surprised? Was there something in his gaze, when Roy first walked in? Some hint of too much softness?

Maybe he was just surprised that they were together when Jay had been so eager to flee from them both two nights before.

Yeah, that was probably it. He was just surprised that Jay had spent the night with him instead of spending it alone or with Roy himself.

Solving that particular mystery doesn’t help as much as Wally had hoped, though, because it only gives him more time to notice and think about the way his gut churns when he looks at Jay and Roy together.

It feels like jealousy, and Wally isn’t sure he’s ready to admit what that means.

Fortunately, the feeling eases when he’s faced with only Roy, and an unexpected visitor showing up shortly after lunch gives him the opportunity to spend time alone with his friend.

* * *

There’s someone at the end of the hall, cloaked and masked like so many of Sanctuary’s residents are. Unlike those others, this person freezes when Wally, Roy, and Jay turn the corner and come into view, and their fingers twitch at their sides before curling into fists. The noise they let out sounds pained, and it stops Jay in her tracks, her eyes widening behind her domino as she stares down the hall.

Wally frowns, feeling his brow crease in a mix of confusion and concern, and Roy bumps into Jay, not noticing that she’d stopped until it was too late. His hands settle on her hips to steady her, and Wally can hear the inhale that betrays his desire to comment although his words must die on his lips as none come out.

“Jay?” The new arrival says, voice hesitant - not with uncertainty, but with what Wally would almost call barely-restrained hope. The voice sounds familiar, too, though Wally can’t immediately place it.

Jay remains frozen for a moment longer before she shakes herself out and gives a low scoff.

“Names, Replacement,” she says, and Wally blinks as he cocks his head to the side. Roy huffs out a laugh, shoulders relaxing as he lets go of Jay’s hips.

“I looked for you,” the man says, and Jay gives the softest of whimpers from next to him, “After- You know. I looked for you. _O_ looked for you.”

Jay lets out a shuddering breath before she squares her shoulders and walks forward, approaching the man.

“We’ve got somewhere off-the-grid,” she says with a shrug, and the man’s hands clench into tighter fists for a moment before relaxing and falling open. Wally feels himself twitch when the man moves to step forward, but Roy’s hand shoots out to catch his arm as he shakes his head.

“It’s okay,” he murmurs, and Wally wishes that he could see his face when he looks over at him.

He looks over at the other two when Jay lets out a surprised sound, and Wally feels his eyes widen and jaw drop with his own surprise at the sight of Jay wrapped up in the kind of hug that looks so tight it must be painful. She seems to hesitate for a few seconds before she raises her hand to pat awkwardly at the dark locks adorning the man’s head.

“I’m fine, baby bird,” she huffs, and Wally’s mind finally seems to catch up to him at that - because he knows that one: Dick uses it, too.

Something inside of him relaxes further with the realisation, and Wally feels the tension bleeding out of him as he watches Tim squeeze Jay even tighter before lifting her up off the ground. She yelps, and Tim laughs, although he doesn’t hold her up for long. Not that he doesn’t have the strength for it, Wally knows, but it’s probably a little weird when Jay already towers over him with her feet firmly on the ground.

“Are _you_?” Jay asks when he sets her down again, and Wally notices the way Tim flinches ever so slightly before giving an easy shrug.

“Yeah,” he says, and it sounds so convincing that Wally wants to believe him despite all evidence to the contrary (the kid’s _here_ , after all), “Just stopping by for a few days.”

Jay stares him down for a moment before giving an annoyed huff and grabbing his hand. She starts leading him back down the hall, grumbling under her breath about ‘stupid masks’ and ‘can’t see your face’ and ‘that’s supposed to be my schtick.’ Tim stumbles along after her, and Wally imagines that his expression under his mask must be one of bewilderment now; if Roy’s chuckle is anything to go by, he’s just had the same thought.

“Change of plans,” she calls back over her shoulder, “You two go on without me.”

Wally looks over at Roy, wishing he could see his friend’s face, and Roy just shrugs before continuing down the hall towards the door.

“You heard the lady,” he says, and Wally shakes his head, glancing back to where Jay and Tim have disappeared around the corner, before he follows after Roy.

“Are you sure that was a good idea?” He asks when they finally come to a stop somewhere out on the grounds, and Roy glances over at him before looking back out towards the trees.

“Yeah,” he says after a few moments have passed, “Tim’s a good kid. Jay’s favourite, if you’d believe it.” He huffs out a laugh, and Wally has to admit that he sees the irony in it, too. It would figure that the brother she’d tried so hard to kill when she first returned to Gotham would end up being her favourite once she got to know him.

Still, Tim is a Bat at the end of the day, and Jay’s not exactly on speaking terms with any of them right now.

“She’s gonna be pissed if he tells B she’s here,” Wally points out, and Roy hums thoughtfully.

He tips his mask up to rest on the top of his head and inhales deeply, seemingly reveling in the fresh, country air, and Wally swallows hard, his mouth suddenly feeling dry, as he watches him.

“He won’t,” Roy says finally, and Wally cocks his head to the side, making an inquisitive noise, “Like I said, he’s a good kid. If he was looking for her before, it wasn’t on Daddy Bats’ orders.”

Wally considers that for a moment as he watches a flock of birds fly overhead in perfect formation. If Tim had been looking for Jay on his own, was it because he was worried? Given his response to seeing her a few moments ago, it seems plausible. Did that mean he disapproved of Bruce’s behaviour towards her? Perhaps her way back to Gotham isn’t as blocked as she seems to think; surely if Tim is on her side, Dick must be, too, right?

It isn’t like Dick hasn’t had his own issues with Bruce in the past, after all. Isn’t like Dick has any problem telling Bruce where to shove it when he thinks his father’s in the wrong.

Right?

“Besides,” Roy pipes up, effectively cutting off Wally’s train of thought before he can follow it any further, “He’d have to admit he was here, too, and B wouldn’t like that.”

“He helped create this place,” Wally points out, and Roy scoffs.

“To help _others_ ,” he says, “God forbid he acknowledges that anyone in his own flock is in less than top form.”

Wally sighs, but he doesn’t bother with arguing.

It’s not like Roy’s wrong, after all.

* * *

Tim doesn’t stick around much that evening, but he does join them the next day, and Wally finds himself wondering how he ended up surrounded by his best friend’s little siblings. It’s just weird, is all. Aside from Roy, these aren’t his Titans, and yet it’s so easy to be around them. To feel safe enough to let his guard down.

Which is, honestly, ridiculous, because they’re both Bats, and that means they’ve likely got twenty contingencies between them on how to take down a speedster should the need arise.

But maybe that’s _why_ Wally feels safe. Maybe it’s reassuring to know someone around him might be able to take him out if his control slips - because, by God, his control seems to be bound by a thinner and thinner thread every day as the rest of his world continues to cave in around him.

And that scares the Hell out of him.

In any case, it isn’t a hardship to have Tim hanging around, especially when he seems more-or-less content to keep himself at Jay’s side, clearly relieved and grateful to have his big sister around again after months of being unable to track her down, of _worrying_ , and, perhaps, regretting how things had played out. The only thing Wally could do without is the critical, analytical way Tim seems to watch him.

No, not him - them.

Either way, really. It makes shivers run down Wally’s spine, makes the hairs at the back of his neck raise. It’s weird, because as safe as he feels around the kid, he doesn’t exactly feel _comfortable_ , if he’s being honest. He wishes he could tell how much of it was on purpose and how much of it was just Tim’s own way of looking at the world. If it was just Tim taking after his father, constantly cataloguing every detail around him so that he can analyse them further at his leisure.

Jay doesn’t seem to mind, anyway. She notices, a few times, and merely responds with a cocked eyebrow and some small gesture to distract him - the boop of a fingertip to his nose, an arm thrown around his shoulders, the tip of a nose nuzzling into his neck. Tim always looks so startled, at first, blinking and freezing for a few moments before he eases into the contact, and it makes Wally’s heart ache for reasons he isn’t sure he’s ready to place.

(Because Dick was never quite touch-starved when he lived with Bruce, was he? But Bruce had _changed_ after Jay died, had pulled back and held the world - his partners included - at an arm’s length.

And that’s the only Bruce that Tim ever really knew, isn’t it?)

Oh, but the kid is good at faking it - at pretending to be a _person_ \- now that Wally is looking, now that he sees the way that Tim’s lips twist into a smile that isn’t quite right as he blushes and ducks his head at Jay’s teasing, as he laughs along with Roy’s stupid jokes. Sees the uncomfortably knowing looks he shoots Wally every so often and the little crease he gets between his brows when he watches Jay and Roy interacting.

Tim disappears with Jay after dinner that evening, dragging her along for a joint session in the Chamber, and Wally tries not to be too curious about what, exactly, they might be trying to tackle. Tries not to wonder if Jay being here has waylaid Tim from whatever his original purpose was.

If he’ll end up staying. If he’ll be _back_.

* * *

Jay stays with Tim that night. Or, at least, Wally suspects that that’s the case, because he can hear the low drone of voices when he passes Tim’s room on his way to Roy’s. He tries not to focus on the spark of jealousy that he feels at that, tries to just be happy that Jay has found someone else that’s on her side.

When Roy lays him out and really takes his time pulling him apart and putting him back together, it’s a little easier to push to the back of his mind.

* * *

Wally’s surprised, the next afternoon, when Tim asks him to stay back after Jay announces that she’s in the mood to do some baking and Roy has trailed off after her, heading for the kitchen. Tim shuts the door behind them with a sharp click and turns to look at him.

“What’s up, Timbo?” Wally asks, trying not to give into the anxiety that’s begun to swirl in his gut, that continues to increase the longer Tim looks at him with that steady, analytical gaze from the day before.

“If you hurt her,” Tim says after a while, his expression melting into something smoother, something softer and more pleasant, and Wally feels himself flinch in surprise, “You’re going to _wish_ that I was the type of man who killed.”

Tim doesn’t appear threatening at all. In fact, he looks perfectly polite now. Perfectly _poised_ , like they’re discussing something benign and inconsequential.

So why is Wally’s heart hammering in his chest like he’s just run several marathons? Why are more and more of the hairs at the back of his neck raising the longer Tim looks at him?

He swallows hard, forcing himself not to look away, and he sees the way the corner of Tim’s mouth twitches as if he wants to smirk.

“I’m not planning to hurt her,” he finally says, and Tim cocks his head to the side, his gaze turning more considering, more _assessing_.

“That doesn’t mean that you won’t,” Tim points out, his jaw ticking as he glances towards the door, towards the hall and everything that lies beyond it, and Wally feels his heart sink.

So Tim sees it too, then.

“I’m not Roy,” Wally says. He sounds defensive even to his own ears, and Tim’s attention returns to him. The younger man - boy, really, because he's even younger than Jay - is quiet for a long moment before he seems to uncoil, tension that Wally didn’t even register he was holding releasing from his shoulders and his face.

“We’ll see,” Tim murmurs, sounding almost demure, and then his expression shifts again, a wide smile stretching across his face as he reaches out to clasp Wally on the shoulder before he steps past him. The sudden change nearly gives him whiplash.

“Now, come on,” he says as he pauses to re-secure his mask over his face, and Wally quickly does the same, “If Jay’s really making Alfred’s chocolate coco macaroons, I’m not risking Harper getting to them all first!”

* * *

Tim leaves that night, citing something about Teen Titans business that he needs to get back to, and Wally sees the way that Jay struggles not to deflate, struggles to keep a mask of indifference on her face as Tim hugs her goodbye, murmuring words too low for him to hear into her ear before he pulls back.

“Hey.”

Roy’s voice is low and gentle as he sets his hand on her shoulder before moving it up to cup the side of her neck. She tilts her head slightly, and he leans in to brush a kiss over her temple.

“He’s a good kid,” Roy murmurs, smirking slightly as he pulls back, “You know, for a Bat.”

Jay snorts, shaking her head and stepping back from the doorway. She turns around, a smile on her lips that looks just the slightest bit brittle at the corners.

“I don’t care,” she says, and Wally’s almost impressed by the way her voice doesn’t shake, “He can run home and tell Daddy Bats and Big Bird if he wants to. I’m done hiding.”

Roy scowls at that, fingers twitching slightly as his hands curl into fists, and, damn, he looks like he’s ready to fight. Like he’s prepared to throw down against The Batman himself if he decides to come for Jay again. A shiver runs down Wally’s spine at that raw anger and fierce, possessive fire, and he has to look away before his stupid fucking dick decides to betray him. Because it’s really, really not the time.

“Just tell me where to aim, babe,” Roy says, and Jay’s laughter practically chimes, it sounds so delighted. Wally looks up in time to see her patting the centre of Roy’s chest.

“Calm down, tough guy,” she says, and Wally bites his lip to hide his grin. Jay meets his eyes when she steps away from Roy, her own sparkling with amusement, and Wally huffs out a laugh.

“C’mon, boys,” she drawls, “No use lingering out in the open like this. Wouldn’t want to make it _too_ easy if Daddy Dearest decides to make a house call.”

* * *

“Wally, what are you doing?”

Wally’s shoulders drop as he heaves a sigh, his body turning towards the source of the voice. Linda Park-West stands before him in all her beauty, and his heart aches in his chest as he drinks her in. Her expression is stern, though, lacking the softness that’s usually reflected there when she’s looking at him, and Wally wants to throw himself at her feet, wants to grovel for forgiveness, despite knowing she’s nothing more than a figment of his own imagination brought to “life” by Sanctuary’s programming.

“I’m sorry,” he chokes out anyway, taking a step closer to his wife as he does, “I’m sorry, Linda. I know I shouldn’t have, but I’ve just been so lonely.”

Linda steps forward to meet him, her palm cupping his cheek as she reaches out to him, and Wally presses into that touch, wishing with all his heart that it was real.

“I love you,” he whispers, “I’m so sorry.”

She hushes him quietly, her thumb brushing at a stray tear as it starts to fall down his cheek.

“It’s okay,” she says gently, and Wally’s heart feels like it’s hammering in his chest, “You have to let go, Wally.”

He shakes his head at that, his eyes screwed shut as he feels Linda’s forehead press against his own. He doesn’t understand how he can be telling himself this - because that’s what this is, isn’t it? A simulation pulled from his own subconscious.

God, can his betrayal really run this deep?

“Look at me, Wally,” she says, and he shakes his head again. The exasperated huff she gives sounds so _real_ , and Wally chokes on a sob.

“Wally,” she says again, and he shudders as he forces his head up and cracks his eyes open. Linda looks sad, is the first thing he thinks, and it makes his heart ache even worse than before.

“Linda, I can’t,” he hears himself say, and her eyes close for a long moment. They’re more than a little red when she opens them again.

“You have to, Wally,” she tells him as her thumb brushes along his cheek again, “We had our time. You don’t have to do it all over again.”

He shakes his head in denial, reaching up to cover her hand with his own.

“But- The kids-” He starts, and the tears that drip down her cheeks steal the breath from his lungs.

“They’re gone, Wally,” she tells him, and he shakes his head, tearing himself away from her and turning around.

_“No,”_ he denies, his voice rising, “Don’t say that! They’re not gone. I’ll get them back. I don’t- Somehow. _Somehow_ , Linda. I can’t give up on them.”

He jumps when he feels her arms wind around him, when he feels her lips press against the back of his neck, warm enough to be real.

“You have to,” she says softly, and Wally sobs, his shoulders shaking as he hangs his head and lets the tears stream down his face, “You have to let us go, Wally. You can’t hang onto the past, the what-ifs.” Her lips brush against his neck again, and he gives another low sob as he stands there uselessly in his wife’s embrace.

“You deserve to be happy,” she says as she tucks her forehead against the back of his shoulder, “And so does she.”

“She?”

Linda gives a low chuckle, and Wally covers her hands with his own again.

“Don’t be an idiot, West,” she sighs.

“Linda…”

“Follow your heart, Wally,” she continues, and then-

“Be good to her.”

* * *

Okay, so. The universe is clearly trying to tell him something, Wally forces himself to acknowledge. Not much use in denying it any longer, is there?

But does accepting it really put him any further ahead? Jay’s still head over heels for Roy, and his own heart is still tied up in Linda, even if his affections are… split now. Even if he _did_ decide to do something about his developing feelings, it wouldn’t be fair to Jay, would it?

Except.

It isn’t like they’d be on uneven footing, not if they’re both still dealing with feelings for other people. Moving on together, putting the work in. Choosing each other. That could be good, right? It just means, you know. Talking about it first.

Yeah, talking about their feelings seems like a good place to start, Wally thinks. Terrifying, sure, but. Well, it’s the adult thing to do, isn’t it?

But is Jay the only person he needs to talk to? Should he… talk to Roy first? Tell him he’d appreciate it if he stepped aside and let Wally try his luck at winning Jay’s heart? Because he’s not stupid, okay. They might be able to make it work while pining over Roy and Linda still, but not if they’re still screwing around with Roy, too.

That’s just signing them both up for heartache.

But wouldn’t going to Roy first just seem like he’s, what, asking Roy’s _permission_ , as if he gets a damn say in what Jay does? Is it really his place to step in? Probably not, now that he thinks about it. Jay wouldn’t appreciate Wally’s presumptions here. She’s not something to be gifted from one person to the next, for God’s sake. She has a say. Hell, she has the _final_ say.

But then again, well.

It’s not only about wanting to pursue Jay himself, not really. He just-

He wants her to be happy. Wants her to stop _hurting_ , and _that_ is something Roy needs to be called out on. Even if she rejects him, or he chickens out on asking her, or whatever else happens, doesn’t he have an obligation to tell Roy that he’s being a dick?

It’s not only about wanting to be her white knight, is it? He’s not trying to play the hero or _curry favour_. It’s about Jay herself, about her deserving better, about Wally not just standing by and watching her get hurt over and over again when he might be able to _stop it_. To break the cycle, as it were.

It’s a moral duty, at this point, isn’t it? Because if he keeps his silence, he’s just condoning it, and he doesn’t want that on his conscience.

Wally lets that thought build his resolve and propel him out of the Chamber, lets it lead him to the door of Roy’s bedroom.

Luck must be on his side, because Roy’s alone when he lets himself in.

Roy looks up from the file he’s flipping through, lips curling into a small grin, but it fades as Wally takes off his mask. Roy blinks, taking in the serious expression on his face, and then closes the folder and sets it aside.

“Alright, who died?” He asks, and his voice seems forcibly light; for some reason, it really grinds on Wally’s nerves.

Wally takes a breath, holding it before he lets it out, and tries not to lose his cool.

“We need to talk about Jay.”

Roy’s eyebrows shoot up immediately, and his shock only makes Wally scowl because, dammit, Roy should have known this was coming. Should have known someone would call him out on his bullshit sooner or later.

“O...kay?” He says eventually, brow furrowing as he takes in Wally’s demeanour. Then, suddenly, his expression hardens, eyes burning with a protective anger as his fists clench. It. It actually gives Wally back a spark of hope, if he’s being honest. Reminds him that Roy _cares_ about Jay, cares about her enough that he’s prepared to fight one of his oldest friends if Wally decides to say he thinks she’s bad news or something.

Roy’s voice is sharp as he asks, “What _about_ Jay?”

Wally tries to remind himself that Roy’s anger is misplaced, that it’s based on a false assumption, and forces himself not to look down or away.

“You’re hurting her, Roy,” he says, and it comes out so much quieter than he’d intended it to. Yet, somehow his voice seems to ring out, lingering in the air for several moments. Wally can hear his heart beating in his ears, can feel the jump of his own pulse.

Finally, Roy scoffs, his expression fading from that protective anger to something more judgemental.

“What the Hell are you talkin’ about, Kid?” He asks, and Wally feels himself frown, his eyebrows drawing together, “That’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever said.”

“Roy,” Wally starts, his hands clenching into fists at his sides, “I’m being serious.”

“So am I,” Roy bites back as he crosses his arms over his chest and looks Wally over coolly before smirking, “I’m not _hurting_ her, what the fuck? I’d think you’d be the _last_ person I’d need to explain a little kinky sex to.”

Wally feels his cheeks burn with that, but he ignores his embarrassment in favour of scowling.

“That’s not what I’m talking about,” he huffs out, and he scowls harder at Roy as he takes a step closer to the other man, “I meant _her_ , as a _person_. Her feelings. Her- Her _heart._ ”

Roy’s expression shifts too quickly even for Wally to track, but it finally settles on incredulous disbelief as Roy forces out a laugh.

“God, you actually believe that, don’t you?” He asks, and Wally’s frown deepens as he crosses his own arms and gives a tight nod, “Christ, Wally. You’re projecting so hard right now.”

Wally sputters and falls back a step in surprise, and Roy sighs.

He hisses when Roy opens his mouth to continue, cutting him off, and Roy huffs before falling silent.

“I’m not _projecting_ anything, Roy,” Wally grits out, “Jay is in _love_ with you, and there is no fucking _way_ you don’t see it, so don’t try to tell me otherwise. Fuck, Roy, anyone with _eyes_ can see it after spending ten minutes with the two of you!”

Roy’s expression shutters as Wally speaks, but he doesn’t let that stop him from speaking his mind now that the floodgates have opened.

“I’ve been trying to figure out what the Hell you’re playing at for a while now, Roy,” Wally continues, his eyes narrowing as he steps up to Roy again, “I thought you were just in denial, at first, but that’s not it at all. You _don’t_ care for her the same way, and yet you’re stringing her along so you can, what, keep getting your rocks off until Donna takes you ba--”

Wally’s eyes widen, his words cutting off when Roy snarls and bolts up from the bed, shoving him backwards and causing him to stumble. He steadies himself easily enough, but he can’t school his expression half as well. He opens his mouth to speak, but Roy cuts him off this time.

“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, West,” Roy spits out, and Wally catches his wrist before Roy can grab the front of his shirt. Roy’s nostrils flare, but he doesn’t try to pull his wrist free, simply meeting Wally’s gaze instead.

“Don’t throw your own fucking narrative on me and Jay just because you want everyone to be as miserable as you are,” he snarls, and Wally feels his brows shoot up in surprise even as his heart clenches in his chest. That-

That _hurt_ , and he can’t help questioning how much of this is Roy’s anger speaking and how much he actually _means_. His bottom lip trembles ever so slightly, and something in Roy’s eyes softens.

“Jay’s not _in love with me_ , okay?” Roy goes on, his voice quieter now, and Wally shakes his head as he lets go of the other man’s wrist, “I’m her best friend - fuck, I’m just about her _only_ friend. Does she lean on me a little more than might be normal because of that? Sure, but I don’t care. I’m glad to support her.”

Wally can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of him then, a dark, unhappy sound.

“Is that why you can’t look her in the eye when you fuck her, Roy? Because she’s _just_ your best friend?” Roy reels back like he’s been slapped, and Wally smiles vindictively. “Did you think I wouldn’t pick up on that? Did you think I haven’t noticed how, from behind, she looks _just_ enough like Donna that you can pretend it’s her in your bed? You think _Jay_ doesn’t know that’s what you’re doing?”

Roy shakes his head in denial, his mouth working silently around words of protest that he can’t seem to get out.

_“You called her Donna while we were fucking her,”_ Wally hisses, and Roy still has that look like he’s just been hit. And maybe Wally should ease off, then, but something in him just wants to grab the knife and _twist_.

“Fuck,” he continues, “You should have seen her _face_ , Roy. You could feel the hurt from ten miles off, but do you wanna know the worst part?” He doesn’t pause for long, not really giving Roy a chance to respond despite the invitation to do so, “She didn’t even look _surprised_ , just. Just, fucking _resigned_ , and I can’t help wondering if because it’s not the first time it’s happened.”

Wally takes a sharp breath, letting it out slowly through his nose, and tries to smother the flames growing inside of him.

“So don’t fucking _tell me_ I’m projecting, Roy,” he finishes, his chest heaving slightly, “Because that’s not what this is. Jay’s in love with you, and this _thing_ you’ve got going on is _breaking her heart_.” He swallows, holding Roy’s gaze steadily as he adds, “And, at this point, I don’t understand how you could _not_ see it, and I really don’t like what that implies, Roy.”

His own expression turns imploring with that, doubt and desperation and hurt shining in his eyes as he meets Roy’s own wounded gaze.

“Tell me I’m wrong, Roy,” he pleads, “Tell me that, _somehow_ , you missed it. That you really didn’t know how she felt. Fuck, Roy, tell me that you didn’t decide she was worth the sacrifice to appease your own stupid fucking ego.”

“Wally,” Roy rasps, eyes wet and lips parted just slightly as he takes a ragged breath, and Wally feels his shoulders slump as the fight drains out of him.

“You _didn’t_ know,” he says dully, and it should be a _relief_ , but instead Wally can only feel his skin crawling with anxiety over the accusations he’d just thrown around, “How could you not know?”

Roy turns away from him then, walking over to his dresser and gripping at the edge of it with both hands as he leans against it. His spine looks like one long line of tension, and Wally almost hates the way he wants to go press kisses down the length of it, wants to knead at Roy’s shoulders and apologize, tell him that everything is fine, he was wrong, he shouldn’t have pried.

Instead, he curls his hands into fists tight enough that his nails are biting into his palms and stays where he is.

“I’m,” Roy starts, pauses for a moment, and then tries again, “I’m all she has, do you get that, Wally? Do you _really_ get it? Why would- Why would I _assume_ she was in love with me? Look, it’s not like I don’t get that codependency is unhealthy, but that’s just the Batkid _way_. I never even _thought_ \- _Fuck!_ ”

He pushes himself away from the dresser and rounds on Wally, anguish and anger painting his features in equal measure, and Wally can’t help the low whine that escapes him when he steps forward. God, but he’d forgotten just how intense Roy’s own self-esteem issues could get, had forgotten how he and the rest of the Titans all spent so _long_ convincing him of how they felt for him.

To this day, he's not sure they succeeded.

Of course he wouldn’t see that Jay was in love with him - to think that it was even a possibility would be a vain, self-indulgent fantasy, in Roy’s mind.

“Roy,” he murmurs, and Roy shakes his head before he brings a hand up to drag it down his face. Wally steps up to him and reaches out to wrap his arms around him, drawing him closer, “Fuck, Roy, I’m sorry. I should have known that you wouldn’t- Not on _purpose_.”

Roy shudders, and Wally hears him swallow.

“No,” he says, “No, if it’s. If it’s as obvious as you’re saying…”

Wally shakes his head again and squeezes Roy closer.

“It doesn’t matter,” he says firmly, “I know you better than that. I should have figured it out. I just, I got so _pissed_ , because it’s so obvious from the outside that she’s hurting, Roy. I let that get the best of me.”

Roy relaxes against him after a few more moments, his own arms moving to wrap around Wally in return, and they stay just like that for a while until Roy starts to shift awkwardly and Wally lets him go.

“Roy,” he says when the silence starts to feel suffocating, “Do you- I mean. How do you feel about Jay? _Really?_ ”

Roy tenses for a moment before forcing himself to relax again, and he sits down on the edge of the bed with a sigh.

“Not that way,” he says eventually, and Wally had expected as much, but it still makes his heart ache for her, _“Fuck_ , this is shit. I never meant to- I was supposed to be _good_ for her. _Fuck!”_

His fist hits the mattress in frustration and Wally frowns as he drops to his knees and crawls in between Roy’s legs, grabbing both of his hands and holding them as he looks up at him.

“You need to talk to her, Roy,” he says, his thumb sweeping over Roy’s knuckles, “It’s gonna suck, but she’ll appreciate your honesty, I think. And-”

“And?” Roy prompts, his brow furrowed as he looks down at Wally, who breathes in a sharp inhale.

“And I think you need to stop sleeping with her,” he says hoarsely, his grip twitching around Roy’s hands with the instinctive desire to flinch away, as if his body is expecting Roy to be _angry_ with him for trying to tell him what he can and can’t do. Or because he can tell that Wally wants her, too, and thinks Wally’s just trying to sabotage them.

Roy _does_ tense, but he also breathes through it as a pained expression crosses his face.

“You don’t think that’s going to hurt her just as much?” He finally says, and Wally frowns sadly, “Jay has experienced enough rejection to last ten lifetimes, and if I tell her I don’t want to- don’t want _her_ anymore...”

Wally sighs, guiding Roy’s hands to his hair and then letting go, letting him anxiously pick at the strands as Wally rubs his legs comfortingly.

“Just be honest with her,” he says, “Yeah, it’s gonna hurt, but only at first. If you keep doing what you’re doing, she’s only going to hurt worse and for longer. Just. For the love of God, don’t let her think it’s her _fault_.”

Roy jerks, his fingers tugging harshly and making Wally wince for a moment.

“Of course it’s not her fault,” he hisses, and Wally glances up at him unhappily.

“I know that,” he says as calmly as he can, “But if you go and tell her, ‘hey, so, I don’t think we should fuck around anymore because you’re in love with me,’ all she’s going to hear is ‘your feelings for me are making me uncomfortable and it’s making me not want to fuck you anymore.’ And then she’s going to think that she let you down, and if she’d just hidden it better, then she’d still be able to please you. To be _useful_ to you.”

And maybe _now_ he’s projecting a bit, but Wally isn’t so sure that that means he’s _wrong_.

Roy makes a noise of surprise before his expression crumples, and Wally nuzzles into his thigh with a quiet sigh.

“She tries so hard to impress you, Roy,” he points out, swallowing the lump in his throat before he goes on, “And, and I _get_ it. Okay? Cuz I look at her, and I see me in the early days. _If I can just be good enough, they’ll stay. If I give them what they want, they’ll have a reason to keep me._ ” He shudders, his eyes squeezing shut, and Roy’s fingers gentle in his hair, carefully massaging at his scalp as he makes a sympathetic noise.

But this really isn’t supposed to be about him and his shit.

“She’ll need to know that not sleeping with her isn’t a, a _punishment_ ,” he forces himself to go on, “That it doesn’t change the fact that you care about her. Hell, she should know that it’s _because_ you care about her.”

He looks up at Roy again, chewing at his bottom lip as he takes in Roy’s expression, the way it looks guarded, but still thoughtful, with his eyes just a little too bright to be from anything other than the tears he’s holding back. The way it tightens as he frowns and draws his brows together, his fingers twisting a little more firmly at Wally’s hair and making him bite down on a whine.

“Why did you have to tell me this,” he whispers after a while, and Wally’s heart feels like it’s sinking into his gut like a stone, “I have so much shit already.”

Wally reels back, his eyes widening for just a moment before they narrow as he reaches up and frees himself from Roy’s grip.

“What the _fuck_ , Roy?” He demands, anger burning through him as he stares at the man in question. Roy, for his part, seems startled by his vehemence, but Wally plows ahead anyway, “What would you have had me do? Stand back and let you keep hurting her? Are you fucking serious right now, Roy?”

Wally pushes himself to his feet as he rants, speaking too fast for Roy to get a word in edgewise but still slow enough to actually be understood, “Get your head out of your ass, Jesus fuck! Sorry if I just ruined your _coping mechanism_ for you, but you shouldn’t have been using a _person_ as a tool in the first place! Do you think Donna would be _flattered_ that you can’t stop thinking about her? Do you think she’d be _happy_ to know you’re fucking around with other girls and pretending they’re her? What is _wrong with y--_ ”

His words cut off as Roy’s hand covers his mouth, and Wally jolts as his back hits the wall a second later.

“Shut. Up,” Roy snarls, his brow pinched with a mix of anger and guilt as they stare at each other, “Shut _up_ , you stupid fuck. That’s not what I _meant_.”

Wally bares his teeth at him, even if the effect is lost with his mouth covered as it is, and he reaches up to grab Roy by the wrist, his thumb pressing into the bottom of it until Roy hisses and lets him go. It doesn’t do much, not when Roy is still boxing him in with his body, but Wally could get around him if he really wanted to.

So maybe he doesn’t. Want to, that is.

His teeth clack together when Roy grabs him by the throat and pushes his head back until it hits the wall, and Wally swallows hard, his mouth going dry as Roy looks at him through narrowed eyes.

“If I hadn’t said anything,” Wally grits out, his brow raising when Roy’s grip tightens just a fraction, “You’d still be hurting her, you just wouldn’t _know_ about it, like that fucking _absolves_ you.” He grabs Roy’s wrist again, but he doesn’t force him to let go this time - not yet, anyway.

“You’re pissed because you either have to stop using her,” he continues steadily, a familiar thread of lustfearlust singing through his veins as Roy snarls again, “Or accept that you’re a fucking _ass_ if you keep doing the same shit you’ve been doing.” Wally smirks and pushes forward against Roy’s grip, “You’ve always been shit at holding yourself accountable, Speedy.”

Roy’s grip tightens then, and Wally makes a startled noise that tapers out quickly as Roy shoves him back against the wall once again. His pulse quickens, and he’s sure his breathing would, too, if not for the way Roy’s hand is wrapped around his throat.

And, god, he’s _hard_.

Of course he is, though - as if he’d had a hope in Hell of anything different the second Roy’d gotten his hand around his neck. Adrenaline floods him, leaving him trembling as Roy glares and squeezes harder; Wally counts his heartbeats as they pound in his ears, letting himself slip slightly into that hazy space where time starts to slow. He can feel the minute twitches of Roy’s fingers that harold his hand pulling back and, even as he takes in the flood of oxygen that follows when he actually _does_ , Wally surges forward to slot their mouths together, his teeth nipping and tugging at Roy’s lip until he growls and pushes Wally away.

There’s only the briefest of pauses before Roy falls into him, kissing him hard and fast as his hands drop to the hem of Wally’s shirt and slide under it. He isn’t gentle, his nails dragging roughly over Wally’s skin as he works his hands higher, first, and then drags them back down his sides as he shifts, slotting one of his legs in between Wally’s own. Wally groans into Roy’s mouth as he grinds against his thigh, and he drags his own hands up Roy’s back before digging his nails into his shoulders.

He feels dazed when Roy finally parts from their kiss in favour of biting a rough path down the side of Wally’s neck, a breathless moan slipping through his lips as his head luls to the side to give Roy easier access. His heart feels like it’s beating in his throat as he drags his hands down to Roy’s ass, groping and squeezing as he drags him closer. Roy grunts against him and bites harder in retaliation, and Wally feels his legs shaking as he does it again before reaching for Roy’s belt and rushing to undo it. The button and zipper of his jeans follow, and then Wally is shoving them and his underwear down and reaching for Roy’s cock, his grip just this side of too tight as he starts stroking it.

Roy swears against his neck and then reaches down, catching Wally by the wrist and forcing him to let go. He pulls back just long enough to strongarm Wally into turning around, and then he’s pressing in behind him, grinding against Wally’s still-clothed ass as his forearm presses harder against the back of Wally’s neck.

“This what you wanted, Wally?” Roy spits out, and Wally can’t help the high moan that tears out of him as he pushes his ass back frantically, “Did you just come in here to pick a fight because you wanted me to show you your place?” Wally shakes his head and bites out a rather unconvincing ‘no’, despite the fact that he’s not lying, and he jumps when Roy’s free hand smacks his ass.

“You think I can’t tell when you’re being a brat?” He continues, and Wally bites his lip to stifle another moan when Roy spanks him again, “You’ve _always_ turned into a fucking bitch when you’re overwhelemed, _sweetheart_. Stay.”

Wally hisses when Roy’s arm presses against his neck before pulling away, and he clenches his hands into fists where he has them bracing himself against the wall, but he doesn’t pull away. His stomach flips when his obedience isn’t immediately met with praise, and heat flares in his belly at the realization of just how much he’s managed to piss Roy off.

He misses the sound of Roy’s belt sliding free of his jeans, nearly jumping out of his skin when it cracks loudly behind him where Roy must have folded it in half specifically for that purpose. Roy chuckles as Wally winces, a shiver running down his spine, and Wally jumps again when Roy grabs his arm and pulls it behind him. Wally huffs out a breath as he’s forced to shift, letting his body take his weight instead of his arms, and shivers again as he willingly places his other arm behind his back and lets Roy start looping the belt around them both.

“Good boy,” Roy finally purrs, except it sounds _mocking_ , and Wally swallows his whine as his eyes burn. He tests the makeshift cuffs when Roy pulls away, and they’ll do as well as anything else; there's no such thing as cuffs he can’t escape, not unless they have dampeners in them, but they both know he’s not _really_ going to be trying to get out of them, anyway.

He hears shuffling behind him, but doesn’t dare look over his shoulder to investigate; it’s probably only Roy undressing, anyway. He closes his eyes instead, breathing in and out slowly as he centres himself, and twitches in surprise when Roy’s hands reach around him to undo his own pants. Roy remains quiet as he works, nothing but the heavy sound of his breathing reaching Wally’s ears as he’s stripped from the waist down.

He sets his foot back down as Roy pulls his last sock off and then tenses, his eyes squeezing shut and his shoulders starting to hunch up as he waits for-

For _something_.

But the blow never comes, and the confusion only makes him tremble as something anxious flips in his stomach.

Finally, Roy grabs onto the belt and tugs Wally backwards roughly, scoffing as he stumbles. There’s nothing gentle about the way he spins Wally around and shoves him forward, bending him over the side of the bed and then reaching for his hair, forcing Wally to turn his face to the side so he won’t smother himself.

He’s so hard that it fucking _hurts_ , and Wally whimpers as he grinds forward against nothing but air, his legs burning as he only then registers the discomfort of his position.

“Roy,” he finally chokes out, and Roy’s hand pets at his spine from his neck back up to where his bound hands rest against his lower back before disappearing for a moment. It comes back with a resounding crack and a sharp spark of pain that has Wally crying out and pushing his hips back even as heat rises in his face to match the warmth that blossoms on his ass where Roy’s hand had just landed.

“You’re always so quick to jump to conclusions,” Roy says, and it’s so _even_ , belying the anger and frustration that Wally knows he must be feeling, that Wally feels a shiver run through him as he curls his fingers into fists. He jumps as Roy’s palm connects with his ass again, his cock throbbing where it hangs down, curving just slightly towards his belly.

“Do you really think so lowly of me, Wally?” He goes on, and Wally gives a sharp gasp when he opens his mouth to respond only to be caught by another slap. It takes several moments for him to wrack his brain, to pin down what Roy’s even _talking_ about, as each spank that follows pushes him back to square one.

“I’m sorry,” he rasps eventually, the only response that Wally knows should fit regardless of what mistake he made, and Roy hums, as if considering the sincerity of it, “Sir, I’m sorry. _Please._ ”

Roy hasn’t even fucked him yet, and he’s already so desperate to come, oh God. His balls feel so heavy, like they’re weighing him down, down, down, except that’s probably just the way his feet are slowly sliding further and further apart as his upper body tries to sink more comfortably against the mattress.

“Please what?” Roy prompts, pausing the spanking in favour of groping at Wally’s asscheeks, spreading them apart to put the tight, puckered rim of his hole on display.

_“Pleaseletmecome,”_ Wally pleads, the words coming out in a rush, and Roy lets go with one hand in order to spank him again.

“Speak clearly,” he commands, and Wally whimpers before taking a deep breath and trying again.

“Please let me come,” he whispers, a shiver running down his spine as Roy prods at his hole with the tip of a finger.

“I’m not stopping you,” he says coolly, and Wally whines as he tries to shake his head in denial because that’s not the _point_. It’s not that he _can’t_ \- because he can, oh God, he can, he _can_ , just like this, - it’s that he’s waiting for Roy’s permission. Waiting to be _allowed_ , and if Roy isn’t- if Roy isn’t controlling that, then it means he doesn’t _care_ , and-

And Wally knows he fucked up, knows he overreacted, but-

He gives a sharp whine, one that has Roy sucking in a breath in response, his hands stilling for a moment before they slide to his hips and then around to his front.

“Please,” he cries as one of Roy’s hands wraps around his cock. It jerks in his hand, and Wally nearly bites through his lip as he fights to hold himself back as Roy’s thumb circles the head.

“Go on, then,” he says finally, and Wally wails as Roy’s hand slides up to the base and then back down slowly. His cock jerks again, spilling messily as Roy continues to pump him with those slow, steady strokes, milking every last drop that he can get out of him.

His knees buckle in the aftershocks, and Roy swears softly as he loops an arm around Wally’s waist and holds him up.

“Easy,” he murmurs, and Wally just gives a quiet whimper in response as Roy lifts him until his knees and shins are on the bed and he’s folded down into a low, kneeling bow, “That’s it. Good boy.”

It doesn’t sound wrong this time, and Wally _melts_ , sinking lower as he lifts his ass slightly in invitation.

“Please,” he rasps, “Please fuck me, Sir. Please, I was wrong, let me make it up to you.”

Roy hums as he massages Wally’s ass and the backs of his thighs.

“Do you even know what you were wrong about?”

Wally flinches and squeezes his eyes shut, his fingers twitching, but stays stubbornly quiet. Finally, he shakes his head, and Roy sighs as he pulls away. Wally’s eyes fly open at that, not that he can really _see_ much from this angle, and he gives a whine that he hopes sounds as imploring as he feels. He hears Roy sigh again, settling when Roy’s hand wraps around the back of his neck and squeezes gently for a few seconds.

“I’m here,” he says, and Wally shivers before giving a small nod. Only then does Roy let go again, and Wally listens until he registers the opening of a drawer. He closes his eyes again then, content in the knowledge that Roy isn’t going anywhere, and lets himself relax until the shock of cool lube against his heated skin pulls him back. It drips down the curve of his ass and onto his thigh, and Wally shifts restlessly as Roy traces a knuckle back up through it and nudges it towards his hole. The finger uncurls to follow it in, and Wally moans, hips pushing back instinctively to invite more.

“I’m not angry that you _told_ me, Wally,” he says, and it takes Wally several long moments to realise what Roy’s even talking about, the feeling of that single finger working in and out of him chasing nearly all coherent thought from his mind, “I’m angry that you _needed_ to. That there was a problem in the first place.”

Wally whines, something dark and unhappy curling in his gut at the edge of pain bleeding into Roy’s voice.

“I’m angry that I didn’t see it sooner,” Roy goes on, and, suddenly, there are _two_ fingers working him open, “Because I _hate_ that I’ve been hurting someone I care about. Because I don’t know how I’m meant to live with this guilt now that I know.”

Wally trembles, and it’s as much from his own guilt as it is from the way Roy curls those fingers inside him and starts to rub against his prostate. God, he can’t even remember what he said now, but he knows it had been angry, and hateful, and full of accusation. Accusations that Roy didn’t _deserve_ , and he should have known better.

“I don’t _care_ if I never get to, to _fuck_ Jay again,” he says - snarls, really, - and Wally jolts when Roy jabs roughly at those sensitive nerves, “I care that I might be one of the reasons she’s _here_. I care that this is one more mistake I have to claw my way through.”

“I’m sorry,” Wally gasps, eyes wet with tears as his heart seems to stutter in his chest from the guilt, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, sorryI’msorryI’msorryI’msorry.”

Roy hushes him but doesn’t ease up any, still prodding painfully at Wally’s prostate until Wally can feel precum beading up and spilling from his cock in a steady stream as apologies continue to pass through his lips.

“I know you are,” he says finally, and Wally sobs with relief as Roy’s fingers spread apart inside of him, stretching him out a few times before he pulls out and spills more lube into him. He returns with three fingers, working them in and out slowly until Wally is writhing beneath him and begging for more.

And then Roy’s fingers are gone, and the blunt head of his dick is pressing into Wally with a slow, steady pressure that feels like it’s splitting him in half. Wally moans softly, feeling breathless, as Roy slides into him fully only to stay put for several long moments.

“Please,” Wally finally begs when he thinks he can’t wait a moment longer, and Roy huffs before grabbing at the belt around his wrists. He tugs at it sharply, and Wally gets the hint, rocking himself forward and then allowing Roy to yank him back down on his cock. He repeats the motion again and again until Roy’s grunts are just as sharp as his own moans, until Roy lets go of the belt and grabs onto Wally’s hips instead, using his own strength to push Wally forward and drag him back as he hammers into him.

Wally screams with each thrust, turning his face and biting at the bedsheets to try and stifle himself, and Roy’s fingers are pressing into him so tightly that he’d be bruised to hell if he was anyone else.

“C’mon, sweetheart,” Roy groans as Wally clenches around him, his muscles trembling with the way he’s fighting to keep his orgasm at bay, “Come for me, Wally, just like this. You can do that for me, can’t you?”

As if that’s a challenge, as if there’s any doubt that Wally will come for him without being touched.

Wally’s voice breaks over his moan as he comes, his cock shooting all over his belly and the bedsheets beneath them as Roy swears and pounds into him harder, fighting to get through the tight clutch of Wally’s body as it tightens with his climax. Wally gives another cry when he feels Roy pulsing inside him, feels the burn of his cum painting his insides with the proof that he was there.

Roy thrusts into him a few more times as he works himself through it, and then he pulls out and collapses onto the bed next to him, chest heaving as he stares up at the ceiling. Wally whines, shifting uncomfortably until he can get close enough to rest his forehead on Roy’s arm. Roy’s head turns so he can look at him, and he takes in Wally’s expression with a critical gaze before he heaves himself up. He settles a hand around the back of Wally’s neck as he turns and carefully shuffles back to sit against the headboard, and Wally shuffles after him on his knees. His eyelids feel as heavy as the rest of his body, drooping low over his eyes as Roy carefully eases him into lying down with his head pillowed against Roy’s thigh.

He opens his mouth to say something, but his tongue feels thick and clumsy in his mouth, and he whines as distress spikes through him. Roy’s hand squeezes firmly at the back of his neck, and Wally shudders.

“Shh,” Roy soothes before beginning to card his fingers through Wally’s hair, “I forgive you, Wally.”

A sob catches in Wally’s throat and is quickly followed by another, and then another, and another, until Wally simply curls himself around Roy’s folded legs and lets himself cry it out, those gentle fingers never once leaving his hair as Roy continues to murmur quiet praises and reassurances to him.

God, but he doesn’t deserve it; he’s the one who just waltzed in and rocked Roy’s worldview and then accused him of being the worst kind of scum, so why is _he_ the one losing it? Why is _Roy_ the one stuck comforting him and forgiving _him_ for being a jerk? He sobs harder at the thought, and Roy makes a concerned noise from the back of his throat. Wally hesitates for a moment before he makes up his mind and lets himself _move_ ; the belt falls abandoned to the bed as Wally rolls over into Roy’s lap and his arms wind around his waist.

If Roy is surprised, he hides it well, simply adjusting to the new position and rubbing at the tense muscles between Wally’s shoulder blades through his shirt with one hand as the other continues to stroke through his hair.

Wally loses time, he’s sure of it, only half-registering when the door opens and someone else slips into the room. He blinks slowly, pressing into Jay’s touch where she rests her hand on his shoulder and watching as she leans in for a kiss from Roy.

Except Roy turns his face away from her, and Wally’s close enough to see the hurt look that crosses her face before she swallows and pulls back. Guilt lances through him, because that’s his fault, too. He did that, planted doubt in Roy’s mind and made him reject her, hurt her in a whole new way.

Fuck.

Fuck, he can’t do anything right, can he? This wasn’t his place to meddle with, dammit, who did he think he was?

Except. Except he had a reason for meddling, didn’t he?

Something else important he was supposed to tell Roy, but hadn’t.

But…

...what?

* * *

Wally makes himself scarce the next day in the hopes that it will force Roy to talk to Jay, and it does. He’s just returning from another run when he spots Jay out on the grounds, her gun trained on one of Roy’s targets at the edge of the woods. He frowns at the sight, rerouting himself and slowing down as he approaches her. He’s careful to make sure she hears him, not wanting to startle her and cause an accident, but he doesn’t say anything right away.

He sees the way her shoulders rise up and go tight, though, and knows that she knows he’s there. He stops a few feet behind her, watching as she unloads her clip into the bullseye of the leftmost target, the noise of the gunfire muffled by the silencer attached to the barrel.

“I know you’re there,” she says eventually, after she’s loaded a new clip into the gun.

Wally is quiet for a moment longer before asking, “Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” She answers, her tone short and clipped as she raises her arm and fires another shot.

Bullseye on the next target over.

“We’ve been here for weeks, Jay,” he explains, “And Roy’s out here every day with his bow, but I haven’t even seen your guns until now.”

She gives the smallest of twitches when he says Roy’s name, but it’s the only tell she allows herself.

“And that means something’s wrong?”

“You’re not my first Robin,” he says softly, “I know how to tell the difference between training and being so upset you need to destroy something with your signature weapon.”

Jay doesn’t move except to pull the trigger again, the bullet tearing a path straight through the same hole that was left behind by the previous shot.

“Guess you’ve got it all figured out.”

Wally hums, watching as she aims for the centre target and puts three shots straight down the middle of it, spaced evenly through the bullseye and the outer ring. She shifts minutely and then adds another two shots to the outer ring, perfectly aligned on either side of the bullseye.

“You have a lot of nerve,” she says finally, and Wally feels his eyebrows raise and his shoulders tighten, “Asking after why I’m upset like you don’t already know.”

“Jay…” He starts, but then trails off. His mouth feels dry all of a sudden, and, fuck, why didn’t he expect this?

Of course she’d know he was the one who talked to Roy, if Roy didn’t outright tell her himself.

“Why would you tell him that?” She asks when he doesn’t continue, and her hand trembles slightly, “You’ve ruined everything.”

Wally’s gut churns, and he licks his lips absently.

What is he supposed to say to that? That he did it for her own good? That Roy deserved to know? They’re both true, but neither feels right.

He’s saved from having to answer when she continues, though.

“If you think having me out of the way means you’ve got a better shot with him, then I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re wrong.”

Wally blinks, and then falters back a half-step.

Is that what she thinks? That he was, what, plotting to steal Roy from her? That he really thinks he can compete against _Donna_ for Roy’s affections? Even if he wanted them that way, he’d have to be crazy to think it was possible.

“Jay, no,” he finally says, his voice sounding hoarse to his own ears, “This isn’t about Roy.”

Jay scoffs at that, and turns towards the next target, her movements jerky and overly-controlled in a way that betrays her anger.

“Of course,” she practically spits, and Wally knows immediately that she’s misunderstood somehow, “Can’t have the big, bad Red Hood dragging Roy down into the darkness and bringing out the worst in him. God, you’re just like everybody else. I don’t know why I expected anything different. Like you said, _I’m_ not your Robin.”

Wally’s jaw clenches at that, the slight against his best friend stinging just as much as if it was a dig against his own character.

Then again, he supposes it is.

“No, Jay,” he reiterates, stepping forward and placing a hand on her shoulder. His other hand comes up, prepared to derail her shot if she spooks, but all she does is tense under his grip. And then her shoulders start to shake, and Wally moves in front of her, his heart cracking a little in his chest when he sees the tears streaking down her face.

“Jay,” he breathes. Reaching out, he pushes her gun-arm down until the weapon is pointed at the ground, and she squares her shoulders and sets her jaw.

“Don’t bullshit me,” she nearly shouts, “You think I’m bad news. That I’m pulling him down, ruinin--”

Wally darts forward, cutting her off with a kiss, and she sucks in a sharp breath against his lips. She remains still, save for the rise and fall of her chest, and Wally reaches up to knot his fingers into her hair as he kisses her for a few moments longer and then finally stops. He doesn’t pull away, though, resting his forehead against hers instead.

“It’s not about Roy,” he says again, infusing his tone with as much certainty as he can, “It’s about _you_ , Jay. It’s about you deserving _more_ , deserving _better_.”

Jay scoffs again, shaking her head slightly, and Wally finally pulls back enough that he can look at her, but she won’t meet his eyes.

“You _do_ ,” he tells her firmly, “You deserve better than to wait around hoping for the scraps of Roy’s affection.”

“I don’t _need_ more,” she says, and he can tell that she’s trying to sound confident, but, to Wally, she just sounds sad, “It was enough. And now I have _nothing_ , do you understand that? Roy is all I have!”

She tries to pull away then, but Wally tightens his grip on her hair and winds an arm around her waist for good measure.

“Jay,” he says, “You still have Roy.”

She shakes her head again, and Wally frowns deeply.

“Yes,” he insists, “You do.” He inhales sharply, running the words through his mind before he opens his mouth and continues.

“Listen, I get it, I really do,” Wally starts, and Jay makes a disbelieving noise, but she doesn’t interrupt, “I know what it’s like to grow up under the thumb of some asshole who makes you believe that you aren’t worth the ground you’re standing on if you can’t be _useful_. I _know_.” He licks his lips again, the grip he has on Jay’s hair easing before he brings his hand around to cup her cheek, instead, “But the Titans taught me that that isn’t true. Your brother did. _Roy_ did.”

Jay blinks, and a fresh tear breaks free and rolls down her cheek; Wally brushes it away with his thumb.

“No one can make you stop believing that except yourself,” he goes on, and Jay finally leans into his palm, “But you’re doing a disservice to more than just yourself by believing it.” She blinks again, a spark of surprise in her eyes even amidst the confusion swirling in them, and Wally exhales slowly and then continues, “When you think that, you’re making a judgement about every single person in your life. And maybe there are some assholes who deserve that judgement, okay? I’m not saying that there aren’t. But you have to let _them_ be the exception and not the rule.”

He hesitates for a moment, parsing out how to say what else he wants to say, and he’s a little surprised when Jay doesn’t interrupt. Instead, she looks like she’s hanging on his every word, and Wally’s stomach flutters uncomfortably - he isn’t sure if it’s because he’s anxious that she’s relying on him to get it right, or if it’s just because _she’s_ the one looking at him like that. When he finally resumes his speech, Wally lets his tone soften.

“Roy is one of the most loyal people I have ever known, and he doesn’t deserve to have that kind of judgement forced onto him,” he says, and Jay flinches, her eyes going wide for a moment before her expression crumples into one of grief, “When I told him, he wasn’t- Wasn’t _pissed off_ that he needed to stop fucking you, Jay. He was fucking devastated that he’d been hurting you all this time and had no idea.”

Jay whimpers at that, her tears welling up again and spilling down her cheeks when she squeezes her eyes shut.

“I was fine,” she protests brokenly, and Wally sighs.

“No, Jay,” he murmurs, “You really weren’t.”

She takes in a few shuddering breaths, and Wally waits her out, not speaking up again until she opens her eyes and looks at him.

“Jay,” he tells her firmly, “Your worth is not defined by how useful you are to those around you, _especially_ not physically. There is so much more to you than a soldier or a warm body to fuck.”

The wounded noise that she makes at that has Wally’s own eyes watering, and he can’t stop himself from leaning in again. And it’s not a sexual thing, not really, but it’s probably still a bad idea given the words he’d just spoken, but Jay melts into the kiss nonetheless. Her free hand comes up to grip at the front of his shirt, the material crinkling between her fingers, and Wally’s thumb strokes over a damp cheek as he kisses her gently, hoping that it’s providing her with some measure of comfort.

When he finally pulls back, he tips his head up to brush a kiss over her forehead, and she shivers against him, sniffling quietly.

“I know it hurts,” he murmurs, “I know you love him, Jay. But you deserve so much more than he can give you right now.”

He draws her into a proper hug then, holding onto her for several minutes until she finally takes a sharp inhale and tries to pull away. He releases her easily, and she reaches up to wipe away the last of her tears.

“I’d like to be alone right now,” she tells him, and Wally’s heart pangs with disappointment, but he nods anyway, taking a step back.

“Okay,” he concedes, “Whatever you need, Jay.”

She gives a short nod and then turns away from him, raising her gun again as she goes. It takes her a moment to steady herself, but she does, and Wally won’t deny that he’s both impressed and a little sad when her shot goes clean through the bullseye of the second last target.

He’s not one for guns himself, but he doesn’t think most people can aim true with tears clouding their gaze and emotional turmoil thrumming through their veins. The fact that Jay can only tells him how used to not being okay she is.

Swallowing against the lump in his throat, Wally backs away slowly, turning around when he’s a few paces away.

“Wally?” She calls after a few more seconds have passed, and he stops, turning to look over his shoulder. Jay is still focused on the gun in her hand and the targets before her, but she must sense that he stopped, because a moment later, she whispers, “Thank you.”

Wally swallows again, any words he might think to say somehow ending up locked tight inside his throat. In the end, he says nothing, but he sees the way that Jay’s shoulders start to relax when he lingers a few moments longer before walking away.

It will have to do for now.

* * *

Wally hesitates as he passes Roy’s room, debating if he’s really prepared for another conversation that’s bound to be emotional. Debating if _Roy_ is prepared for it, too. If Roy even wants to see him right now, if some part of him still blames Wally for bringing this to light, making him confront it and deal with it.

But. It’s better to get it over with than to keep dredging it back up, isn’t it?

Roy might not even be in right now, anyway. Might be taking out his own pain just like Jay, although Wally’s not sure where he’d go, with Jay taking over his personal range.

He could be in the Chamber, too.

Wally sighs, and rests his forehead against the wall by Roy’s door as he goes back and forth on what he wants to do. Someone walks by him, and Wally’s neck prickles as he wonders if they’re looking at him, if they’re pitying him, or. Or something.

Fuck.

He pulls back and straightens up, knocking half-heartedly with one hand as the other tries the doorknob and finds it unlocked.

“Roy?” He says softly, looking up to see Roy lying in bed with an arm thrown over his eyes. His heart pangs, and he swallows hard as he closes the door behind himself and steps further into the room.

Roy twitches, his chest rising and falling evenly, but he doesn’t move his arm or try to sit up, and Wally sighs as he moves to sit on the edge of the bed. He reaches out, putting his hand on Roy’s leg, and Roy shifts, pulling away from him.

It hurts, but Wally tries not to take it too personally as he pulls his hand back, dropping it into his lap to hold the other one.

“Roy,” he says again, “Are you-”

“If you ask me if I’m okay,” Roy cuts him off, “I’m going to kick your ass from here back to Keystone.”

Wally swallows hard as a shiver runs down his spine.

“Right,” he mutters. Of course.

Honestly, he should have figured that. One emotionally-driven conversation is all Roy can take in one day, especially coming off the coattails of another one the day before.

His mouth doesn’t seem to get the memo, though, because it opens again.

“She’s gonna be okay, you know,” He says, and Roy groans, finally lifting his arm away in order to shoot Wally a glare. He ducks his head, looking away as his shoulders hunch up.

“Sorry,” he mutters, and Roy sighs. There’s a rustle of movement behind him, and then the mattress dips slightly. Wally huffs when Roy’s chin lands on his shoulder.

“S’not your fault, Wally,” he says, and Wally frowns.

Roy’s not wrong, exactly, but it doesn’t feel that way. Not entirely.

“Hey,” Roy says when Wally doesn’t answer, “I mean it, okay? This is shit, but. I’m glad you told me.”

Wally feels some of the anxiety in his gut fade at that, his muscles loosening as his tension drains away. He exhales slowly and turns around, going easily when Roy pulls him in and moves to lean back against the headboard with Wally in his lap. His lips ghost up the column of Wally’s throat, and he swallows hard before ducking his head.

“Roy,” he starts, and Roy sighs softly.

“Yeah,” he says, “Kinda figured.”

“It’s just not a good idea,” he says, sounding conciliatory, and Roy’s arm tightens around his waist.

“I know,” he mutters, and Wally wonders what he’s thinking, if it’s about how them fucking around right in front of Jay is only going to hurt her even more, or if it’s something else. If Roy _knows_.

He swallows again and pulls back enough to meet Roy’s gaze.

“There’s something else,” he starts, uncertain, and Roy raises a brow at him. Wally shifts anxiously, and then goes on, “I… I thought about telling you yesterday, but-”

“But we got a little side-tracked,” Roy fills in, his voice rueful, and Wally chuckles.

“Yeah,” he agrees, “Just. I think. I mean, it’s just-”

“Spit it out, West,” Roy grumbles, but he doesn’t seem annoyed, not really.

Wally takes a deep breath and then lets it out slowly.

“I think I might… ask Jay out.”

Fuck.

_Fuck_ , he can’t believe he just said that. It’s out there now, no take-backs. He’s. He’s going to have to do something about it now, right? He can’t deny it any longer.

His renewed tension must be obvious, because Roy’s hands move up his back to knead at his shoulders. His expression is surprised, but he doesn’t look angry the way Wally had been kind of expecting him to.

Still, the silence is killing him.

“I meant to tell you,” he rambles, working himself up further, “This wasn’t. I didn’t. I wasn’t trying to, to drive a wedge between you, or cause trouble, just so I’d have a shot, Roy, I swear, I-”

“It’s okay, Wally,” he murmurs, deft fingers still working into his muscles, “I… guess I’m not surprised, really.”

Wally makes a questioning noise, his head tilting to the side curiously, and Roy huffs.

“You wear your heart on your sleeve, Kid,” he explains, “It was only a matter of time.” He frowns, looking deeply unhappy, and then adds, “Maybe I wanted this to happen when I got you two involved with each other. Maybe a part of me knew I was holding her back.”

Wally considers that for a moment, and decides it makes sense. Maybe he should be pissed about that, he thinks, because if it’s true, well. Roy kind of manipulated them both, didn’t he?

But.

He meant well, and that should count for something.

Roy shakes his head, visibly pulling himself together, and then gives Wally a sharp smirk.

“This is the part where I tell you I’ll put an arrow through your kneecap if you hurt her, right?”

Wally shudders, and Roy chuckles.

“Seriously, though,” he adds, “I mean it. I’m. I’m _trusting_ you with her, or whatever. Don’t make me regret it.”

Wally swallows, his mouth gone dry, and he manages a small nod.

“I’ll do my best,” he promises.

* * *

Wally thinks about telling Jay the next time he sees her. And then the next.

And the time after that.

Every time he tries, though, he just can’t get the words out. They stick in his throat, choking him, and he hates himself for it. He tells himself it’s just not the right time, though, that it’s only been a _day_ , that he needs to let her at least start to bounce back from the emotional blow of Roy ‘breaking up’ with her first.

It’s bullshit; he’s just a coward.

A coward whose dumb heart can’t remember how to beat its usual rhythm whenever Jay smiles at him, whose stomach decides to start practicing acrobatics every time she leans into him or rests a hand on his shoulder. Every time she _holds his damn hand_ , like. Fuck. He feels like he’s seventeen and stupidly crushing on all of his friends all over again.

But it’s… kind of nice, actually.

Because she doesn’t exactly look at him like she _knows_ , but she still looks like maybe she’d be open to it. Open to him.

They haven’t fucked since that morning in her room, but she still seems _comfortable_ around him. Seems like maybe she’s starting to believe what he said about not needing to offer anything she doesn’t want to give.

And that will still be true if he asks her out, of course it will. But.

Wally’s a little afraid she won’t believe it.

So he keeps his silence on the matter, gives her time to adjust to _this_ before he tries to throw another layer on top of it.

Wally’s not a patient man by nature, but for something like this…

He can wait.

He should have known everything would go to shit as soon as he started letting his guard down.

* * *

It’s a bad day; Wally can tell from the moment he wakes up. When he wakes up alone in bed with thoughts of his wife and kids dancing behind his eyelids, the echoes of their laughter in his ears as he clings to the remnants of his dream.

Still, he makes his way to the Chamber, hoping that maybe a quick session will help him get his head on straight and work through the anxiety clawing at his chest. Except, when he gets there, it only seems to make it worse because his mind is pretty firmly _not_ prepared to cooperate with him.

He’s not even entirely sure where the thoughts are coming from, not when he’s seen firsthand how people like Jay and Roy are right there with him, struggling through their own shit. But it just.

He feels cynical. Angry.

He doesn’t even know _why_ , just that the feeling is suffocating him. His thoughts are in turmoil, spinning around so quickly he can barely make sense of them.

They hiss at him that everything is _fake_ , that everyone here is just. Just _humouring_ him, pretending to need help so he’ll feel better about needing it himself. Because, shit, he needs it; he’d thought he was doing better, but one dream and it feels like the bottom of his world has fallen out all over again.

He’s supposed to be better than this. He’s a _hero_ , for God’s sake. He’s supposed to be a symbol of hope, and. And he hasn’t been, lately.

So it makes sense, doesn’t it? That other heroes would come together to try to reignite that spark in him.

It’s so disgustingly egotistical that Wally feels sick.

It’s not even _true_ , he knows that. He does.

He’s just having a little trouble believing it.

But proof… He’s always worked well with proof. With facts, and evidence. And. And he can get that, can’t he?

Sanctuary seems to disagree, doesn’t want to show him any such evidence, and it only makes Wally more determined.

He’s fixating, he realises distantly, but it’s too late for him to reign it in.

He can collect the evidence himself. If there’s _anyone_ who can do it, it’s him.

And so he does.

* * *

_“It’s not so bad here. Honestly, it’s better than anywhere else has been recently. Isn’t that sad? That ‘not so bad’ might as well be ‘great’?” Jay laughs, and it sounds wet to Wally’s ears, “There are people here. People who want me here with them. Or, well, maybe that’s going too far, but. But they don’t_ mind _having me here, anyway. Still an improvement.”_

_She hunches in on herself, and Wally wants to scream. Wants to tell her that he does want her here. Wants to shake Roy and tell him to_ tell her she means something to him _, because. Because, fuck, even if he doesn’t love her the way Jay so clearly loves him, she’s still supposed to be his best friend. Isn’t that what Roy had called her?_

_And maybe this is from before, from when Roy didn’t_ know _, but, fuck. He really, really hopes Roy put those insecurities to rest when they talked, if it is._

_“I don’t have anywhere else to go, anyway. My d-_ Batman _kicked me out of Gotham. Out of my_ home _, and-” Her breath hitches, and Jay reaches up to rub at the scar on her neck, “And maybe he was right to. Maybe he_ knows _. Maybe he can’t handle it.”_

_She chuckles, and it’s dark, haunting, making shivers run down Wally’s spine, and then she looks up at the camera lens._

_“Batman doesn’t kill,” she says, “But he’s killed me twice. I’m bad for business, I guess.”_

_Her lips curl into a weak smile._

_“Batman doesn’t need anymore dead Robins.”_

* * *

_“So, turns out I’m a piece of shit.”_

_Roy looks _exhausted_ , and Wally wants to cry. This wasn’t what he wanted, wasn’t why he told Roy the truth._

_He shouldn’t be watching this, but it’s too late for that._

_“Jay’s, like, in love with me or something. S’what Wally said, but she confirmed it. Apparently it was_ obvious _.” He sighs, and drops his face into his hands, rubbing at his eyes. “I feel like such an ass,” he mutters, his voice muffled by his hands before he looks up again, “All the shit we’ve been doing… Fuck, it’s not like I ever tried to hide how I feel about Donna.”_

_Wally wants to hug him so, so badly, fuck. Wants to apologize, to tell Roy he’s not an asshole, he just made a mistake. A big one, sure, but a mistake nonetheless._

_“Why did it have to be_ her _?” Roy asks, “All I ever wanted to do was protect her, take care of her. Shit. Instead, I’ve gone and dumped all over her shit about always being second best, like it wasn’t bad enough already.”_

_He laughs, but it’s a dry, bitter sound, resentment and self-loathing clear in his gaze._

_“Fuck,” he grunts, his hands curling into fists, “I need a damn drink.”_

* * *

_“I didn’t know she’d be here,” Tim tells the camera, domino covering his eyes even when he’s supposedly safe from any prying eyes, “I’ve been looking for her for so long… I’ve been. Worried. Guilty. Beating myself up for not doing_ more _, not stepping up to tell B to stop.”_

_A muscle in his jaw twitches, and his hands clench against his thighs._

_“I thought,” he starts and then pauses, swallowing hard before he continues, “I was worried he killed her. But. Roy would have come for B, I think. That’s what I was holding onto, anyway.”_

_Tim hangs his head, his shoulders slumping in defeat._

_“What does it say about me that I thought that of B?”_

* * *

Wally watches video after video, watching them on fast-forward as quickly as he can recreate them from the timestream. They swirl and blend before his eyes, ringing in his ears, until he can barely parse them out.

_”They become my family. I’ve watched so many of them… die.”_

_“When you got no powers except sticks with things on them, you tend to get hurt in this game. And I was hurting in every way, so doctors had me on some pills. Then some more pills. And I kept getting hurt. And there were all kinds of pills.”_

_“So… Okay, then. I’m here. I’m ready. I’m talking… Help me.”_

_“So you understand. I appreciate your work. This help you give. But still, I think, there are others. Suffering more. I would prefer to bite my lip. Thank you.”_

_“Let’s be honest, right, I don’t even know what the Hell ‘will’ is.”_

Bruce. Roy. Booster. Diana. Uncle Hal.

_“Ángel de dios, que eres mi custodio…”_

_“Is Clark Superman trying to be flawed? Or is Superman Clark trying to be better?”_

_“I’ve been at Sanctuary for three months. And some more days. A long time. I guess.”_

_“And you need a guy who’s there. Or an anybody who’s there. Someone who’s been in it, who’s done things as bad as you. You need that. I need that, at least.”_

_“Jay’s the cool, rebellious one. Tim is the dark, smart one. Damian is the cute, dangerous one. Everyone knows. But what the Hell am I?”_

_“Dick’s the funny, nice one. Tim’s the smart, loyal one. Damian’s the obnoxious, little one. So what the Hell am I?”_

_“Dick’s the funny, nice one. Jason’s the rebellious, cool one. Damian’s the cute, mean one. So I get it. I get it more than… I get it. But what the Hell am I?”_

Kyle. Clark, La’gaan, TedDickJay _TimDinahEddieDamianGnarrkBabsDonna--_.

It’s too much. _It’s too much._

* * *

Wally takes off running, desperate to flee from the surge of overwhelming pain in his chest. Distantly, the distorted ringing of an alarm can be heard, but he’s not focusing on it, not focusing on anything except getting away, away, away, run, Wally, run, _run, hold it in, don’t lose control, you can’t lose control, you can’t--_

He should have paid more attention, perhaps, because he trips a few yards out from the house, stumbling and losing his momentum. He shouts, down on his hands and knees, with the blaring of the alarm finally catching up to him, and he can’t, he can’t, he _can’t_ , they need to go back inside, he can’t control it, can’t pull it back in, he’s too compromised.

“Wally?”

Oh, no, nonono, not her, not her. Voice so soft, so worried, so _close_ , a shadow in front of him on the ground, a body kneeling before him, a hand closing over his shoulder.

_“No!”_ Wally screams it, tries to jerk away from her touch, but it’s too late.

His head whips up, his eyes widening in despair as the electrical currents he couldn’t get under wraps surge through their point of contact, running up her arm and overtaking her whole body. She gives a soft gasp a moment before the screaming starts, and Wally wants to _die_.

No, no, this can’t be happening, it was just a moment of weakness, just one moment, this isn’t right.

He watches in stunned silence as flames seem to engulf the two of them, walls of burning red surrounding them like a forcefield as Jay’s eyes glow white and yellow.

_What the fuck_ , he thinks hysterically.

Her screams cut off sharply, and the walls of flame go out a few moments later, blowing backwards with a sharp gust of energy that is nowhere near what it would have been if the speedforce hadn’t been contained first. If Jay hadn’t _absorbed most of it herself_. Still, Wally hears the shouts from behind him, but he can’t turn to look, can’t see if he’s wrought even more destruction than this.

All he can do is stare as Jay crumples before him, unmoving and unseeing, her widened eyes vacant and lifeless.

“No,” he whispers, frantically reaching out to touch her chest, her wrist, her neck, “No, no, nonononoJaynoI’msosorryI’msosorryfucknonono.”

He jumps when he feels a hand on his shoulder again, flinching away and looking up in fright. His eyes burn with tears when he sees Roy’s grim face looking down at him, and his shoulders shake as he babbles out apologies.

“Roy,” he finally chokes out, “Roy, she’s- I- I killed her.”

“I know,” he says softly, too softly, oh God, how is he not losing his _mind_ right now? “It’s okay, Wally.”

Wally stares, stunned back into silence for a few heartbeats as Roy kneels before him at Jay’s other side and carefully lifts her and then sets her down again, laying her out on her back.

His hands fall into formation above her breastbone, and Wally drags the last vestiges of his scattered mind together.

_“It’s not o-fucking-kay!”_ He shrieks, and Roy’s head snaps up to look at him.

“Lower your voice,” he hisses, and then he breathes out through his nose and gentles his tone, “Wally, listen to me. I swear, it’s going to be okay.”

Hysterical laughter bubbles out of him, and Roy frowns but opts to ignore him in favour of hunching himself over Jay’s prone body and attempting CPR. Wally doesn’t understand the point, they both know she’s gone.

“Roy, stop,” he says when he finally manages to choke off his laughter, when it fades into tears, instead, “Roy. _Roy_ , she’s gone.”

Roy’s expression is hard when he lifts his face and looks at him. Determined. It makes Wally’s brow furrow with confusion.

“You can’t let them see her,” Roy tells him sternly, his gaze briefly flickering up above Wally’s shoulder, and Wally hears himself respond as if he’s underwater.

“They’re going to know,” he says, because what’s the point in hiding? They’re all going to know it’s his fault. That he _killed_ her, oh God ohGodohGodohGod. He’s so distracted he doesn’t even see Roy’s hand coming, jolting a little when the palm connects with the side of his face - and maybe that was the point, because it makes him blinkexhalelookatRoy.

“Kid,” Roy says, and it’s still stern, it is, but Wally can hear the undercurrent of panicanxietyfearworry, too, “They _can’t_ see her. No, _listen to me_.” Wally’s mouth snaps shut before his rebuttal can even fully form, and Roy continues, his voice dropping lower as some of the other patients nearby begin to stir.

“You need to take her somewhere: one of my safehouses, or one of yours, I don’t really care, just take her and then send word,” he instructs rapidly, and Wally can only blink in confusion. What is Roy doing? Is he really planning to help Wally, what, _cover this up?_ “I’ll tell everyone you’re taking her to the hospital, okay? But you need to go, Kid. _Now._ ”

As he speaks, Roy reaches out to brush his fingertips over Jay’s temple and then down the side of her face, touching her so, so gently, and Wally’s heart squeezes in his chest.

“I can’t run from this, R- Speedy,” he says hollowly, and Roy’s head cocks to the side.

“She’s going to be okay,” Roy tells him, and Wally can’t help the renewed laughter that bubbles out of him.

“She’s _dead_ ,” he hisses through his fit, and Roy reaches out to cover his mouth.

_“Shut up,”_ he snarls, voice low and quick as he goes on, “Not so loud. Fuck. _She’ll be back_ , okay? Do you get that? That’s why you need to get her out of here before anyone figures out what’s happened.”

_She’ll be back._

Oh.

Oh, God, Roy is losing it, then.

“Just because it happened once, doe-”

“More than once.”

Wally’s mouth snaps shut, and he winces as his tongue is caught between his teeth. Because Roy doesn’t sound delusional; he sounds _pained_. He sounds serious, and tired, and _sad_ , and Wally’s eyes widen as his mind returns to one of the videos he’d watched only moments before.

_“Batman doesn’t kill, but he’s killed me twice. I’m bad for business, I guess.”_

He’d _heard_ it, of course, but it hadn’t. It hadn’t really _clicked_ , not with so much else going on in those fleeting moments before disaster struck.

What kind of cruel mistress is fate, to allow Jay to die at the hands of those she trusts again and again?

His hands shake as Roy bundles Jay - not Jay, her _body_ \- up and passes her - it - off to him, and he’s sure the expression on his face must be as tortured as he feels.

“Run, Kid,” he murmurs before he tips forward to brush his lips over Wally’s forehead, “I’ll take care of things here and then meet you. Okay?” When Wally just stares at him and clutches the body closer, Roy’s gaze narrows and his voice drops into a lower register that has a shiver running down Wally’s spine.

“Okay?” He asks again, and Wally swallows hard before nodding.

“Okay,” he agrees, and then he does what he does best:

Wally runs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout-out to Jane and anyone else who figured out where things were headed ;)
> 
> I’m not… 100% happy with the reasoning in the lead-up to the meltdown, because the canon reasoning just doesn’t fit anymore, not when Wally wasn’t _alone_ at Sanctuary. But I just couldn’t for the life of me come up with another reason, so. You know. Please suspend your disbelief and latch onto ‘panic/anxiety doesn’t always make sense’? Please?
> 
> Hope you liked it!

**Author's Note:**

>  ****Advanced Trigger Warning For Part Two:**** Despite this being a HiC _fix-it_ , there is still going to be Temporary Major Character Death; feel free to message me directly if you want further clarification than that. I think I read somewhere that you can dm on here? If not, you can also reach me on tumblr at [atasteforsuicidal](https://atasteforsuicidal.tumblr.com/ask), though please try to avoid messaging on anon so that I can answer privately!


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